What can I do?

[broken4886]

I’m dying inside. This break up is eating me alive. I started a new job two weeks ago and I can’t focus. The job is such a good opportunity but I’m messing it up because I can’t think about anything but the break up and how fucked I am in terms of finances. She left me with a mess. Now I’m at my parents. She’s saying doesn’t want to give me my dog. My bank account is overdrawn by hundreds and hundreds of dollars. She was bad with money and I was trying to keep us a float. But with the new job I haven’t had a paycheck in over 3 weeks.

She was my best friend. Theres hole in my heart. What will I do? Together 3 years. I’ve been blindsided. I know sometimes my anxiety and depression made me hard to deal with at times. Panic attacks and being irritable towards her. But I never cheated or lied or hit or put her down. I always supported her. I tried to do my best for us. I love her so much. I never laughed with anyone more. She’s my whole heart. Please help me.

[broken4886]

I just want to stop thinking of it even for a little. Just some relief. The pain is so bad I feel like my chest is caving in.

[broken4886]

I’m so scared about what’s going to happen. Or what if I can’t do life without her. I feel so dumb for not seeing this coming. I’m so unprepared. I should have been more responsible with money choices.

[piglet52 in reply to broken4886]

It’s okay to feel that way. But if she couldn’t handle you with all your depression and anxiety then maybe she wasn’t the one. Don’t be too harsh on yourself. It’s a difficult period of time right now bc you feel hopeless and maybe you won’t be able to “live without her” or “do it without her” but at the end of the day. You’re still trying to survive and provide for you, sometimes people just don’t know what they can or can’t handle. But you’ll be okay. I care. And I understand what you’re going through. Just keep pushing and you’ll get somewhere without her.

[broken4886 in reply to piglet52]

I just wanted to do it together. I thought we would get married one day. I feel like everything I thought the future was holding is gone. I miss her so much.

[piglet52 in reply to broken4886]

Your future with her might be gone, but your own future within you and what you can do is endless. You can still achieve whatever you want to even if you feel like you wish it was her by your side.

[Katelan24 in reply to broken4886]

I feel the same

[gogogirl in reply to broken4886]

Hey, I know what regrets are in different ways and I am old . I guess old is all relative. I'll bet you're beating yourself up also because of money- take care of yourself, your job, your dog, family, and whoever else is in your life. You can also talk to crisis lines, and maybe 211 has some ideas about the money also. You also need to get your dog back- focus on that. If she cannot handle money- she cannot take care of a dog.

[Katelan24]

The same thing happened to me. Like the exact same thing same everything here for you!

[soulsquest7]

Man, I share your heartache and pain. I've been through some tough times as well. Please try to remember to not be too hard on yourself. Rather, speak peace into your life. You can do this by remembering positive, true statements about who you are. Here: bit.ly/2zkuh7x are some helpful ones. Also, don't be ashamed or embarrassed to see a counselor or pastor. These are great resources that can help. They've helped and continue to help me!!

[gogogirl]

Is that your dog? If she won't give you your dog- that is stealing, right? You can take her to court. Also, please for your sake in the future- take care of your own finances- good luck to you.

[broken4886 in reply to gogogirl]

We got the dog together. But he was financed in my name. I did get him back but now I just feel horrible for taking him from her. Because she loved him too. I just feel like no matter what I do I’m upset.

[gogogirl in reply to broken4886]

You did the right thing- enjoy the time with your dog, and remember sometimes disappointment or loss can take time to process. Maybe you can meet other people with dogs and get a group going. If she did damage to your finances- that is part of the reality- also. Plus you have your parents and now a job. Give yourself a break and think about the good that you have.

[broken4886]

I don’t want her to hurt. But I do want my dog. The whole thing is so confusing and upsetting

[gogogirl]

You'll look back, and some day see this was a period of growth- what kind of work do you have? Maybe just talking about that can help.There are so many interesting people on this site, educators, scientists, artists musicians- builders, engineers , lawyers- , hi tech people - you name it- it's here.