Im done: Today I have reached my... - Anxiety and Depre...

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Im done

3Dwaffle
3Dwaffle

Today I have reached my breaking point. I realized there is no hope for me. Im 26 y.o. and I never been in serious relationship (meanwhile almost all my friends are dating or even engaged/married) Im currently looking for a job but for some time I cant get to “second round” for interview. I dont have any passion/curiosity for anything (hobby). I became very apathetic about life. Im slowly losing my friends as they move out of the city I live in and I dont know how to make new friends(I developed social anxiety over the last months and I lost all my social skills.) I feel anxious/depressed for some time but i am too ashamed to talk about it with somebody. I dont have a single person to talk to about this issues. Im not seeing terapist or taking any meds. I frankly dont know that to do. I am worthless. Sorry for my broken English, im not native.

21 Replies
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Anxiety and depression is nothing to be ashamed of. It’s no different then any other illness. You need to see a doctor.

First off You are not worthless!!!

Secondly your only 26 there is so much more in life

I don’t know your history but I recommend seeing a therapist even just for advice on life

Don’t give up

I am also 26 and have never been in a relationship or had a real job. I had only one job interview when I was 18, just out of high school, that went so poorly I have been too afraid to try to find a job since. I currently have no friends either, though I am very close with my siblings and parents (who still allow me to live with them). I'm only now seeking help and I am really nervous about it but also excited. I don't know your situation and what you can do but coming to this site and being open about it is a good first step. I hope you find some kind of help.

3Dwaffle
3Dwaffle in reply to jacklopez

I hope you find your happiness soon :)

Hidden
Hidden

I realize loneliness is tough. But being in a relationship can be tough too. Having babies can make you feel like you are in culture shock because it is so intense!!! Nothing brings a guaranteed peace or calm except if we can find happiness and peace within ourselves. I forced myself to get married at 24 cause I felt it was the thing to do!!!! Hard!!!!! I have 3 wonderful grown children I love more than anything in this world and a precious grandson who lights up my life too and I don’t regret that At all.. try to find what makes you happy. You are young and I remember those feelings that society puts on us. But just take some time for you too. To feel better and I really think the rest will come to you naturally.

3Dwaffle
3Dwaffle in reply to Hidden

Thank you for reply, I never thought being married or having kids is easy but from my point of view you have SOMETHING and I have nothing. Even my friends are joking Im going to end up like lonely woman with 10 cats.. Its lame but im worried i will be alone for the rest of my life :/

Hidden
Hidden in reply to 3Dwaffle

Life itself is challenging so I wasn’t assuming you thought it was easy. Just not a happiness guarantee. Even tho I do have great kids I sometimes still feel lonely because anxiety and depression make you feel somewhat isolated when no one understands. As far as a cat lady__whoops here I am. I love my cats!! They’re awesome. Brats sometimes but awesome.

Even when you are surrounded with everything you’ve ever thought you wanted you can feel empty. I have been there. I think depression and anxiety do it. Look how many rich successful people with families end it all. I know I need to learn to love myself so I don’t mean to be preachy. I get it. The first part of this week was terrible for me. I remember being worried about being alone when I was young too. So I understand your feelings.

guys, thank you for your replies I appreciate it 🙂 im considering I may ask for therapy appointment

Hidden
Hidden

I totally get what you’re going through. Feeling lonely is often a feeling we experience from time to time, and it is exacerbated when we’re dealing with emotional issues. But hey, don’t feel bad that you’re not married. What is more important is that you learn to love yourself first because having self-love is going to push you through tough times when you go through the ups and downs of a relationship. Don’t rush into love too soon because that one person that you yearn for to love you is going to come along. Im only saying that because I’ve felt like you do in the past, but I’ve learn to change my perspectives on life and it’s helped me to survive. It took me a long time to learn to accept that I don’t have to be in a relationship to be happy.

Hidden
Hidden

I am forty and am in the same boat. It’s nothing to be ashamed of. Admitting you need help is the first step towards feeling better. Relationships will happen when you are able to love yourself. You can’t give what you don’t have. Try and seek help for your anxiety and depression. Take time to heal.

Hey your not worthless we are all put on this earth for a purpose you just havnt found yours yet i surgest going to the doctors and maybe getting some help through therapy or medication finding a job is difficult in its self hunni stick in there

3D Waffle

I just want to say that (unfortunately) there are so many of us in your shoes. Glendajean was right about finding our happiness within.....no one else can do that for us. We have to fight! I am 55 and I have developed awful social anxiety but when I look back thru my life, I have always been socially awkward and anxious. I’m not sure why now it is really getting to me and is so painful. I was married, divorced, 2 amazing grown children but I have not had a serious, loving relationship since my divorce. I’ve cut off a lot of my friends for various reasons, some for good reason, some for -I don’t know why’. Being aware of what’s happening is the start. You are there, push forward to make new friends, repair others. Go on-line and type in Meetup.com, it is all kinds of groups of people with many interests. It’s not necessarily for dating but there are groups for that. You name it (hiking, dancing, photography, dog lovers, walking groups, and even things like social awkwardness, meditation, yoga). Your area sill be a bit different of course. But pick just one and take the 20” of courage to walk in the door to meet new people (I know that’s not easy), just 20” Talk to people, and don’t give a rats ass what a single one of them thinks of you or the way someone might look at you. All that worrying is in our depressed, anxious brains..we make these things up. I have adopted more of that attitude, be you! Don’t worry about that relationship right now, and societies pressures. I’m 55 and single and trying to avoid societies stigma.

I also want to say that your sweet responses to other posts shows that you care. Remember that YOUR kind words could save someone’s life!!

We are here for you and each other.

Go to the library or book store and try reading some self-help books too. It’s different that using your phone or computer because you are out of the house (near people). Even though I’m not conversing with any of them, it somehow comforts me to be with others. People are what get us through this life. Even those in this site. God Bless.

3Dwaffle
3Dwaffle in reply to Haley7

You are so kind and helpful ❤️ wish u all the best ☺️

Hidden
Hidden

You are not broken. You are just lost in the funk of anxiety and depression. They go hand and hand. I myself have been there. It is hard to reach out to meet others as you feel like you may not deserve it, but you do. You should seek out a therapist that works in cognitive therapy. It can be life changing.

I feel so sorry you are feeling so low and have reached breaking point. You are very young and have so much to live for although I know at this moment in time it doesn't seem like it. I am wondering if trying to help others may be a way making friends or at least interacting with other people, even if they are older or not exactly who you might choose for friends. There are organisations who are always in need of a pair of hands to help, even if it's a charity shop where you can meet kind and sincere people. The Salvation Army are wonderful people who I am sure would support you if you are not seeing a therapist. They may be able to point you in the right direction for help. Sometimes just helping others, even if it's a menial task, can lift your spirits and make you feel worthwhile again. I wish I could recommend something to help you. I would volunteer for something just to be able to meet somebody to begin with and hopefully you will be able to get a job before too long. I feel so sorry you are having such a tough time at the moment but I'm sure life will get better and things will improve. Good luck and thinking of you.

rach1402
rach1402 in reply to pump321

That is such good advice, those of us with anxiety and depression are sensitive and we care too much! Finding a healthy way to channel that can do so much good for others and ourselves. I agree that we can feel lost sometimes and helping people can give us a sense of purpose and make us feel part of something worthwhile. Along with seeing a doctor and/or therapist, charity or community work is definitely worth considering x

Since there is still somewhat of a stigma regarding mental health, I can understand why you do not want to talk to anyone about it. However, talking about it is the only way that is going to help you. Have you broached this subject with your doctor? It sounds like you may have depression. I’ve been diagnosed with severe depression and many of the symptoms you are describing sound like what I go through. I am attaching an article that may help you understand what you are going through: bit.ly/2kl1RR2. I strongly recommend that you speak with your doctor so he can direct you toward counseling or medication. If you are having difficulty finding a professional counselor, here is a list that practice within the US: bit.ly/2bYaQqv. In the meantime, please try not to add additional pressure onto yourself. Learn to love and be happy with yourself. The relationship and job will fall in place later. Think about what would make you feel good about yourself and self-indulge, whether it’s a little shopping, a spa day, writing in a journal, or working out at the gym. This is the time to take care of you so don’t be afraid to be a little selfish! I will be praying for you and the improvement of your situation. Please take care of yourself. God bless.

Hi chinadoll1374, thanks for your kind reply. As I live in a post-communist state in eastern Europe I must say that when it comes to mental health the implicit bias is enormous.Until last week I wasn’t even able to seek for the help. After I posted here, I realized I need professional help.I did a bunch of work this week,I would say. Firstly, I set up my first therapeutic session on Thursday(yesterday) and I must say I like it:).I will definitely give it a try. I also tried “alternative psychology”. Few days ago one therapist I contacted recommended me something like art therapy. Today I finished my second drawing and on Monday I have an appointment to discuss and analyze my drawings. I bought some psychological books with exercises I can do at home.. I appreciate your effort, I’ll check it out later.

3Dwaffle
3Dwaffle in reply to 3Dwaffle

Wow, I have read the article and I think I have all symptoms except significant weight loss/gain..

That is wonderful that you have been so proactive in getting help and doing what is necessary to get better!

Haley7
Haley7 in reply to 3Dwaffle

Awesome!!!!

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