GOD KNOWS IM TRYING

[OB73]

MY LITTLE BOY ASK ME TO BE WITH HIM IN HIS SCHOOL BREAKFAST FOR DADDYS I SUFFER FROM ANXIETY DEPRESSION AND SOCIAL ANXIETY PANIC ATTACKS GOD KNOW I WOULD LOVE TO BUT IM AFRAID I MIGHT HAVE A EPISODE AND I WASNT ALWAYS THIS WAY IM SO HURT THAT I MIGHT NOT BE ABLE TO SHOW UP AND THIS IS NOT ME I WAS ALWAYS THE STRONG DAD SUPER DAD AND NOW IM AFRAID TO DRIVE OR EVEN BE AROUND PEOPLE ... WHAT IM GOING TO DO THIS IS HEART WRENCHING AND I DONT WANNA BREAK HIS LITTLE HEART BY NOT SHOWING UP FOR HIM .. GOD HELP ME!!! PLEASE😥😥😢😢😢😢😭😭😓😓😓🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾

[Starrlight]

I’ve been through similar and the times I went I was glad I did and the times I didn’t go I still wish I had.

P.s. my psychiatrist says not to avoid but I get that sometimes we just need a break

[b1b1b1]

Would a tranquilizer help?

[Frederik96]

For this reasons we have Lorazepam and Alprazolam, you can enjoy it and it’s easier the second time without. Because ur brain will save the victory and that the situation is not harmful

[OB73 in reply to Frederik96]

ARE THOSE MEDS THAT WILL CALM IT DOWN??

[aequitas1983 in reply to OB73]

Yes, while I would not depend on them due to addiction long term (as in....you don't want for every obstacle in life to be dependent on medication to get you through), you will be calm and able. It will help your social anxiety and general anxiety. I've been there and we all want to be strong, present, and able for our children. Please be kind to yourself....you are a strong father that this is a big issue for you not to miss. You're great. If you have the medication, they will help. Worst case, you could prepare yourself prior with meditation and relaxing....knowing you're okay. You will be present for your child....and you are the amazing parent you are. I know exactly how you feel as far as fulfilling this moment.

While I would never advertise for the benzo class.....they would work. If you're already prescribed them you should be set. If you aren't, you'll need to speak with your doctor. I would not start off any conversation saying you want/need them as this seems to be a habit seeking behavior. I would see your regular doctor because seeing a doctor for the first time asking for these medications will also set off red flags. If you do not already have an active prescription for these meds, hopefully they can set you up with a one time fill for it and you're able to use it for situational issues like this or severe anxiety bouts that are out of your normal range.

Best of luck with this and please treasure that moment with your kiddo and enjoy every moment of it.

[Frederik96]

Exactly Panic attacks anxiety … They block the GABA receptors in your brain. I don’t know the American name of this medics, but Pfizer Tavor Expedit is a Dragee that melts under you tongue and starts helping after just 10 minutes. Not for use longer than 14 days straight it’s addictive, or like I say better addicted than life over but that’s something everyone has to decide

[OB73]

Im on clonazipam .25mg i take it about everyday and been on it for bout 10months it help some but the other antidepressants do not agree with my system

[Arymretep]

Yes, Diazapam is good for things like this to get you through, only for short term as said or occasional use have a chat with your Doctor .

[OB73 in reply to Arymretep]

I dont wanna become addictive to this stuff I never been a drug addict in my life ....smh God help me..

[Arymretep in reply to OB73]

Diazapam is only for short term use so you won’t get addicted to it if used in the proper way, hopefully they would help you to be there for your son on his special day, as I said talk it through with your Dr.

[Frederik96 in reply to OB73]

There is a time when your frustration and suffering is so strong, that you thank god for this medics. I wouldn’t consider me a drug addict. It’s a medication I need. I don’t take it for fun or because , my childhood dream was to take this stuff.

[Frederik96 in reply to Arymretep]

Yes diazepam is an option too :))

But often the effect is too long

The half time of Diazepam is 2 to 3 times longer than the other two

Maybe it’s me but diazepam makes me veery sleepy 😴

[OB73 in reply to Frederik96]

Thankyou Bro!!! 😪

[Frederik96 in reply to OB73]

Hey everything to make u and your son happy. We sit in the same boat And as Bro‘s and Sister we need to change our position in this world.

[Arymretep in reply to Frederik96]

People react differently to different drugs, they suit me if I have to get through a difficult situation, i usually find half the dose is enough to calm me down

[Frederik96 in reply to Arymretep]

Yeah that’s true I life now for one year as a benzo permanent user and I wanted to switch to Diazepam because of not so many up and downs per day but sadly not for me It was my own decision I didn’t slide into an addiction. I was for weeks only full of anxiety and panic. I couldn’t eat and watched just under the roof and hoped the day is finally over. So I made a choice which rescued my life

[OB73 in reply to Frederik96]

Thankyou bro i wanna get better this is consuming my everyday of living with my family ...

[Frederik96 in reply to OB73]

I know what u mean. It destroyed my life from one day to another as well. I guess having children makes it even worse.

[Nothingnoted]

Thats ok. He loves you. He so proud of you. Your his idol

[Dolphin14]

I like to rephrase the words to dependence and tolerance. This is what happens with benzos and many other medications.

When taken as prescribed with MD guidance you will be ok. Quality of life is so important. If you build the tolerance and dependence over a period of time, you will most likely have withdrawal when/if you decide to come off.

I'm now working on a slow weaning off of benzos. It was my choice.

I hope you can find peace so you can enjoy life's precious moments.

🐬

[aequitas1983]

I responded to another comment and read through others and it sounds like you got great advice. If you are already prescribed a benzo (Klonopin) and it isn't quite enough for this situation, you may talk to your doctor about a dose adjustment or going to a different type. A slight modification might do wonders in general and for this day. If it's just a slight modification for the day (such as the doctor says take double the dose today only), you shouldn't have to worry about addiction. This especially if you aren't taking the medication on a daily basis.

I know it's as important to you as it is for your son. Get yourself set with the meds, relax a bit before the breakfast (tea, music, whatever makes you feel good), and enjoy that time. I totally understand from showing up at these functions myself. It was so important to me and our presence, while seemingly mere, makes their day. I know missing out on them hurts us as much as it hurts them a little (sometimes luckily not at all because they understand). So, hoping the best for you getting this straightened out and made possible. Hope it's a day he won't forget. Sounds like he has one heckuva dad. Best of luck and much love from one dad to another. You got this.

Edit to add: Besides the medication....envision this day positively. The drive, the walk in, greeting the folks at the front. See a good day. Do not let the negative possibilities in on your vision. You'll be out of your comfort zone a bit BUT it's going to be okay. Think about the smile, the hug, and enjoying breakfast with your son. How happy you'll feel. And for the record, sir, you're still a super dad....that part never ends. Anxiety/mental health issues can't take that from you.

[hungrymonky]

i hope you can go! but it’s understandable if you can’t make it. sometimes we don’t need to push ourselves past certain limits. you sound like a good father. if you aren’t able to, he will forgive you and you can make it up to him. god hears your prayers and he will help you 💜 god bless

[aequitas1983 in reply to hungrymonky]

Agreed, completely! Kids do understand and it's okay to know limits if it's just not working out. Make it up to him, find another opportunity, or show up for lunch (if allowed) randomly on a day one feels more ready for that. Either way does not change if one is a good father. To see this post made me happy and sad....happy to see someone so passionate about making their kid's day but sad on the doubts....because internally you can see Oscar cares immensely about this day and his son. I hope it does work out but if it doesn't, you're right, it's okay! Great post and thoughts.

[Frederik96]

Yaiii welcome to the team ☺️☺️

[Frederik96]

Yes I agree with Luna. The dose isn’t really enough to solve something.

[jonnylongton]

Oscar, only a thought from what i can remember from when i had a lot of phycology. i suffered same as you i didnt dare leave the house, if i did had to be in or else something bad would happen so i had to use set times . Well one week after weeks of discussing David the Phycologist bought in a small rock of a gemstone, he called it a soothing rock and when i got panicky to rub it. Also , and this ended up working for me , he told me to imagine the stone to be the anxiety and the depression, and keep saying to it "im not letting you spoil my fun , you can try , but you know what im going to take you with me to enjoy it. So instead of concentrating on my fears i used the stone as my fears and rather than it keeping me in, take it with me , and if i got a little anxious id rub it and under my breath say "listen be quiet im trying to get things done, and id rub it"............ so silly i know !!!!! but you know what after a couple of weeks it started to work . Never agaiin did i have to be back for 11.30 to make sure the gate was locked and bolted, and the door shut, id come in at 1 or 2 o clock , and nothing bad happened to me . He got me to use the power or my mind in a different way . Please give it a try. Whatever you do , i pray it works for you as i know how much hurt you must be going through . x

[Positivechanges]

Being at my daughter school always caused me anxiety so I can relate to how you feel. For me it got a little easier each time. When you face your fears it makes you stronger. Try deep breathing and meditation exercises before you go. Taking CBD also helps or there is a natural pill called Calm Aid that's made from lavender that really helps me when I need it. Don't overthink about you anxiety. Your son will be so happy to have you there.

[Dansing]

PLEASE TRY TO GO AND BE STRONG!

JUST THINK.HOW HAPPY YOUR LITTLE.BOY WILL BE.

MAY GOD GIVE YOU STRENGTH !

[mhg22]

i feel sad for you not being able to be at your sons big day...

it is heartbreaking im sure for you

but you know yourself well i guess and if you really cannot risk having an episide in public at your sons event then its for the best you follow you intuition

kids are resilient and they love is no matter what

they are the only people on earth who can love purely and innocent

my kids never hold grudges when my sickness gets in the way of me being there because they are kids and kids cannot hold grudges like us adults

i am doing my best and the see that! just like you are doing your best and your son will see that!

[wiggity_whack]

No advice for you really, just chiming in to say that the same exact thing happens to me regularly. I don't know what the source of your anxiety is, but I found out that mine is due to OCD (which few health professionals know anything about). Here's a little info, just in case:

treatmyocd.com/blog/gad-vs-...