Overwhelmed

[Dananxiety]

Hi all. I am 56 yr old retired guy. In between 2 relationships right now. Been living with my ex for 20 yrs. Found someone new and it just took off. Anyway been on med for depression for 18 years. Now anxiety/panic disorder is off the charts.

[Marshall64]

Welcome to the forum. Is your relationships causing your recent increase in anxiety?

[Dananxiety in reply to Marshall64]

Hi Marshall. Yes both relationships are stressful. Trying to stay friends with the ex as we have pets together. Also new girl is very needy.

[Hidden]

Hi Dan, I totally understand. I deal with a lot of anxiety and panic. And depression. I’m 50 but still working which in some cases helps because I have something to focus on.

Is the relationships adding to the issue? Have you found a good therapist and found any medication that helps?

Feel free to chat with me. We are here to help and share. You are not alone.

[Hidden]

Welcome to the family, Dananxiety.

You will find that this community is very helpful. Hey, two relationships can definitely cause mental health issues.

[Hidden]

Are you keeping this new relationship a secret? If so that could be making your situation worse. Secrets tend to make us sicker at times.

[Dananxiety in reply to Hidden]

Hi Glenda. New relationship is out in the open . It wasn't originally. My ex and I have pets together so a clean break is difficult. Being pulled in 2 different directions is straining .

[Marshall64 in reply to Dananxiety]

Look at it this way, you got two girls fighting over you. Stressful yes, but some guys would like to be in that spot. The pet situation is tough though. May need custody arrangements.

[Hidden in reply to Dananxiety]

Yes it is or would definitely be straining so I’m so glad it’s out in the open. I’m sorry about your pets. They are just like family so I know that makes it hard!!

[Hidden]

Hello and Welcome!

Why do you think your anxiety is heightened? Is it from leaving the old, somewhat comfortable, safe past for the unknown and unproven future? Hmm...

[Dananxiety in reply to Hidden]

Hi Gratitude. Yes the change is a stressor. It's hard starting over at my age. Never planned this. It just happened.

[Hidden in reply to Dananxiety]

Hang tough Dan and don’t stop fighting for your balance. I think it’s doable. Your situation with your pets is and would be a nightmare for me. I can empathize with you there. I really think that you’re going to be fine...this is a period of growth and change for you. Please stay in touch with the group and let us know how it’s going. Sending you hugs!! 🌞

[kevinloveslen]

Hello Dananxiety, I read your post and thought I would write a response and try to give you a little encouragement. It seems that having one new relationship can be extremely stressful, especially when the other person requires quite a bit of support. Then to add on to that another relationship, I can understand why you are dealing with anxiety and panic. Do you have any support systems outside of those relationships? Are you a member of a men’s group at church? Are you a member of any professional organizations? Do you have any hobbies? I wish you the best and will keep you in my thoughts and prayers.

[Dananxiety in reply to kevinloveslen]

Thanks for the support, Kevin. The new person is very lovable but needy, wants to move forward and needs a lot of attention.

The old person and I are still friends, spends time at my place because we have pets together. We also have a 20 year household to divide up.

Additional support? Looking for a therapist and an anxiety support group. Hence I joined here. A few friends but all they say is "dump, dump" them lol. I have to put myself first in these relationships. That is my first step in dealing with two needy people.