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[Candacegreen]

Good evening everyone. Does anyone else have a problem with lying? I have been doing this off and on to the point to where my husband wants to end our marriage. Growing up i thought lying was the way and i had to always do it to protect myself. What to do?

[AZ1970]

I don’t have an specific ideas, other than to get help from a therapist. It’s really good that you see what you are doing and want to change.

[Strongheartforever]

This is poison. You need radical truth to lead a healthy life. Maybe you can’t be truthful to yourself somehow, you lie to yourself or try to escape reality. Won’t work. Radical truth. That’s how intimacy is built, the only way to connect with another being. And this is your purpose. Love is lost in lies, found only in truth. Let this be your mantra. Every lie is like the ink of an octopus, poisoning with faulty manipulation. Picture the lie that comes out of your mouth as poison smoke. You’ll be loved deeper and truer when your world is free of all the ugly cobwebs.

[Crackerjack4u]

Hello Candace and Welcome. As you said, in your younger days to protect yourself you felt the need to lie, but you are not a child anymore and real adult relationships are built on trust, and the truth. Without the truth a relationship can not have trust which is what holds it together.

Have you asked yourself questions as to why you feel it's necessary to lie, especially in your marriage? Was the actual marriage itself based on lies to begin with? Did lying become a habit as a child that carried into adulthood, are you still needing the protection that caused you to lie as a child, are you doing things that you are afraid or ashamed to tell the truth about, etc. etc.

To answer your question of What To Do, I suggest finding out why you feel the need to lie by talking to a therapist, and Stop doing it because it isn't going to do a thing but cause you problems. Good Luck hun!!