New here

[heavy_gecko]

Hi all! I'm new here and just wanted to say hi and vent a little. I'm looking forward to having a place where I can do that with people who understand depression, because I feel like I can't talk to anyone in my life without being made to feel like 1) it's my fault and I need to "stop" it, or 2) I don't "need" to be depressed because I'm perfect and great and nothing is wrong with me. Well I'm not perfect, I definitely have problems like everyone else, but the fact that I'm feeling terrible right now is a separate issue. And if I could just "stop" being depressed, I would have already. Duh. It's just lonely and frustrating having no one to say this stuff to who understands. I end up hiding it all the time from my loved ones because it's easier than trying to explain it AND get the support I want. So I usually just pretend nothing is wrong. But it's taking its toll on me and I'm glad I found this community where I can say this stuff. So hello, and thanks whoever is listening!

[DemureRose]

Welcome! I joined this community maybe a year ago and it’s the best thing ever. Having a safe place to vent and ask questions is such a relief. I’ve also met some great people on here.

I have social anxiety and so many times people don’t understand. My friends get annoyed when I ask them to order food for me or when they hear me practicing asking a question under my breath. And they know I have anxiety but I don’t think they comprehend the disorder part and not the fact that it’s a disorder.

I hope you find this community to be as helpful as I have.

[heavy_gecko in reply to DemureRose]

Thank you, I'm sure I will 😊

[Shomacco]

I’m new here too. I get where you are coming from. I think I’ve been saying its ‘ok’ for so long and knowing it is not that its become one of the things I’m great at, Hiding in plain sight. I’m just tired of hiding...

[heavy_gecko in reply to Shomacco]

Someone I know once posted on FB the "face of depression" and it was a bunch of smiling people. I felt that was very true.

[Shomacco in reply to heavy_gecko]

I saw this one and it really resonated with me. huffpost.com/entry/living-w...

[Agora1]

Oh we're listening and we care. Welcome heavy_gecko, I'm glad you are here

with us. This is a safe place for you to come and be the real you. No pretense

necessary. We understand and we support each other through thick or thin.

I'm glad you took that first step forward. xx

[heavy_gecko in reply to Agora1]

Thanks so much for your kind words!

[Kat_21]

Hi, I'm new here, too. I know how you feel. It's hard to pretend and smile when inside you have all these voices and thoughts that just won't let up. Here if you need to talk. Welcome!

[heavy_gecko in reply to Kat_21]

Thank you!

[aromafi]

Hi heavy_gecko, it’s nice to meet another person who is new here as well. I can understand where you’re coming from and like you said, if we could stop it then why bother with all this trouble? I still have things to work on despite seeing a therapist, taking medication, downloading mental health apps, and reaching out to others. I feel like I’m doing my best with what I can in the moment, and it feels like there’s just a sense of pressure to get better right here, right now. It also doesn’t help when you reach out for help and some people don’t get your situation or know what to say. I hope you will find that support you are looking for here.

[heavy_gecko in reply to aromafi]

It's a lot of work just coping day to day. And yeah, people don't really know what to say to help, so it's a very lonely struggle. Thank you 😊

[Want2BHappy3]

I can relate, I don’t talk to anyone about what I’m going through, they don’t want to hear it. I pretend everything’s fine. I have a counselor who calls me every 2 weeks. I think I have a good one this time. Have you looked into that? 😷🙏

[heavy_gecko in reply to Want2BHappy3]

I've tried counseling in the past but haven't had one in years. Honestly I haven't been motivated to seek one out, mostly because it means bringing up the whole issue openly again, and that would start too many fights with at least one person in my house. I'd rather avoid it and keep managing on my own. Most days it's fine, thankfully. There are hard days but I just keep my head down and wait it out. Not ideal though.

[Islandgirl15]

Hi I am also new to this joined last week and I can totally relate to what you are saying as I don't really talk to anyone either and pretend everything is fine.

[heavy_gecko in reply to Islandgirl15]

It's pretty draining. On the bad days all you want is someone to understand. That's why I went online to find support.

[Islandgirl15 in reply to heavy_gecko]

I had my mums funeral on Thursday. Friday and today have been down days so far, I'm hoping for a good day soon.

[heavy_gecko in reply to Islandgirl15]

Oh no I'm so sorry about your mom ☹

[Lindamoriarty12]

Welcome, you are soooooo strong never forget that, we care..I feel the exact way I feel like I can't talk to anyone about my mental health but I've started little things that make me feel a bit more positive, so I have started to post on this, I have got started painting, I have tried listening to postcasts,excercising even if its just 5mins on youtube, listening to happier music and I have got a diary to write my feelings, what I'm grateful for daily and something I want to achieve each week.everybody is different but this helps me when I'm at my worst..

I feel as though I am making progress for once in my life. I have suffered from anxiety and depression my whole life I'm 25 years old. I was sexually abused from a young age from a family member and I really struggled throughout as my mom was in and out of hospital my whole life and I was in foster care.

please know you are a strong, beautiful and an amazing person.You are Enough!!

if you ever need a chat please message me okay?

[heavy_gecko in reply to Lindamoriarty12]

Thanks for your kind words! I also do art, and listen to happy music, and try to stay busy. It's a long term struggle.