Looking for friends (finally decided on this title after many anxious minutes)

[mirai]

I'm new here, I have severe mental illness from drug abuse, the symptoms of which are mostly depression, anxiety, anhedonia, and depersonalization. I'm on meds, and I know they'll help me, but there's been so many roadblocks that have slowed things down. I always get so close to a better place, to being myself and feeling like a human normally does..

The hardest part is that no one in my life has any idea what this is like. I'm here to find people with similar struggles, even to just talk about anything. Just having a friend who knew what was going on with me would be so helpful.

[Hidden]

Hello! I can relate to not having other people understand what you’re going through. Often times people say I’m faking it just for attention and that really hurts me. I am too looking for people to connect with to gain a positive friendship which I lack.

[mirai in reply to Hidden]

Hi! That really is the worst feeling. It's so insensitive too, like even if they didn't understand what you were going through the least they could do is offer support regardless. Ah but what can you do. At least we have this place!

[Hidden in reply to mirai]

Exactly! So glad you joined. I’m pretty new here too and so far I think signing up was the best decision I made in a long time.

[mirai in reply to Hidden]

Saame. It's such a relief to have people you can share this stuff with.

[Hidden in reply to mirai]

Let me know if you every need to talk. I’m a great listener

[Orangeblossom85 in reply to Hidden]

❤️

[Orangeblossom85 in reply to Hidden]

That is so strong! I’m also faking! I’m also looking for attention all the time. Funny enough, I spend most of my days truly alone and so away from people. Still whenever I pick myself up and ask for help or even just share my thoughts, feelings, struggles, they are so keen and fast on judging me. I’m always surprised how fast people are to assume that they know me better than I could ever do...

[MariaLove123]

I totally relate. I’ve lost friends and even a few family members because they don’t understand. They are happy in different places in their lives than me. They either have jobs or children and I’m stuck in this rut. I think I look lazy to them. I feel a lot of people who don’t have mental illness don’t want to be around it. They are on a different path. Some might think they are better than me. I just know that I can’t find a good friend who wants to be there for me and actually makes an effort to call and hang out with me. I’m new here too so I hope you keep sharing!

[mirai in reply to MariaLove123]

This exactly. The only comfort I can find from this is knowing that when I'm better, the difference will be so night and day that everyone will realize how bad mental illness can really be. And I imagine people saying to me, "wow, you've totally changed and you look so happy and excited about life!". When I'm better though, I'm gonna do everything I can to spread the word about mental illness and help educate people.

And that isolation, knowing that you're in such a bad place that you couldn't even have friendship, it sucks. Especially because it's the thing you need most.

What are your ways of coping with all this? I play video games and watch tv, but mostly I just browse the internet endlessly. I don't really have the energy or motivation for anything else.

[Hidden]

Hi and Welcome Mirai! 🌞

I would love to have a new friend!! Message me anytime! I understand depression well 😮❤️

[mirai in reply to Hidden]

Thank you for the warm welcome! I'm starting to like this site. It's so friendly

[Hidden]

Hello Mirai and welcome !!! We’re all your friends here so I hope you find this place helpful xx

[mirai in reply to Hidden]

Thanks!! I've been here less than a day and have already talked to so many nice people

[Hidden in reply to mirai]

Yes they’re an amazing bunch! I hope it brightened up your day today and always x

[techguy]

I had issues just like you. I found acupuncture and it changed my life.

I also changed to a really healthy diet and more exercise. There is an end to the crap they call depression,you just have to do whatever you can and you will come out.

[shodan95 in reply to techguy]

I agree. Exercise and healthy(ish) diet helped me regain self-esteem and feel dedicated to something during deep depression. Cooking and caring for myself when feeling uncared for by the world helped me a lot because I would have otherwise just made my condition worse eating junk and gaining more weight.

[shodan95]

I can totally relate. In my culture, mental illness or even just struggling with heartbreak is frowned upon. I spent many lonely nights depressed and anxious in a house full of people who supposedly loved me. What got me through day by day was journaling and therapy. This site didn't exist when I was struggling, so I'm glad it's here for you during your battle. Stay connected! You've already made a really smart decision to reach out here.