Am I Really Welcome?

[Squadray]

Um Hi, I'm completely new to this so I don't really know how to start. But I find myself feeling alone and unsure how to communicate my feelings related to my depression. People in my peer group say they understand and that they're here for me but I feel like they don't take me seriously. So, I guess I'm asking this community for help.

[bridder01]

Howdy Squadray! Welcome to the community! You'll find the people here are very nice and supportive. Don't be shy to share what's on your mind! When it comes to communicating, just take a breath and let the words flow. Express yourself in the way that you feel comfortable. We're all here to listen

A friend,

Brian

[Squadray in reply to bridder01]

Hi Bridder01. I really can't even express the relief I felt when I read your reply. To be honest I teared up a bit, so thank you. Today like most days I just feel like I'm trapped in this dark hole that I can't get out of no matter what I do. I need people that understand what that feels like because it's really starting to be overwhelming.

[bridder01 in reply to Squadray]

I can totally relate Squadray. It feels like the walls are closing in and you just want the pain to end. If you ever need to talk, or vent, I'm here for ya. The rest of the community is here for you too. Never be afraid to share. You're not alone in this fight!

[Hidden in reply to bridder01]

Glad to see you back! I have been waiting for you to post again. How are things going with the tumor?

[fauxartist]

welcome squadray...and your in a very good place to share...these are kind people who come from all walks of life and we all have understanding of what it's like to struggle socially when we feel on the outside with our issues....friends mean well....but it's good to find those that live with what you have to everyday to relate to and know your really not alone.

[Squadray in reply to fauxartist]

Hello Fauxartist. Thank you for taking time to respond to my post. I feel like I'm driving a wedge between myself and those around me because I can't always manage my feelings. I have so many down days and so few good ones, and it seems like no one understands.

[CazO46]

Hi, you are absolutely welcome Squadray. You might find it easier to share online than with friends. People here won't judge you and have lots of life experience that hopefully will help you. Take care and stay in touch

[Squadray in reply to CazO46]

Thank you, that really means so much!

[Dubba61]

Hiya Squadray, n yes, you really are welcome. Everyone here has depression/ anxiety of different sorts. So we understand your reluctance when sharing with Peers. People mean well, but, they haven't "walked a mile" in our shoes." Have they? Best of wishes😊👍🌻

[fauxartist]

I understand what your saying....and if they are good friends....maybe explain to them not to take it personally when your having down days and just except that's part of who you are and let them in your life that way, explain this is just a part of you that you cannot help and are doing your best, but you just have to ride it out....if they are good friends they will accept that about you and understand. If they don't ....then they don't. It's a good sign who will be there for you and who won't ...it's good to know.

Here you can express a lot of what you may not want to talk about openly and without judgement or harassment....these are really kind people who are understanding. Writing about your stuff is also very cathartic and helps take some of the power out of our pain.

[RaqXo]

Welcome squarely. Glad you found this community! I totally understand the feeling of being in a black hole. My mom and sister don’t really understand what I’m going through so I really appreciate coming here and venting when I’m loosing it. Many of us can relate here. I hope you find this helpful. Take care.

[Squadray in reply to RaqXo]

Thank you! I really can't believe how nice everyone is already, this was probably one of the best choices I've made for myself in a long time.

[RaqXo in reply to Squadray]

aww I’m so happy you feel that way. Continue reaching out to people. Continue finding solutions. One step at a time and don’t be too hard on yourself.

[Squadray]

How do you make it through your toughest days? I try to fill all my days with work so I have no time to think negatively. This isn't really working to well for me anymore.

[RaqXo in reply to Squadray]

Through my worst days I have to just wait it out. I force myself to go for a walk or I vent here. I’ve learned that this a process of finding what will work for me.

[Squadray in reply to RaqXo]

Yeah that makes sense. I just want to be happy everyday, I wish it wasn't so hard.

[RaqXo in reply to Squadray]

I can relate. I would do anything to just feel at peace and happy like other people. If I find things along the way that help me I’ll share it

[Squadray in reply to RaqXo]

You are awesome, thank you

[CazO46 in reply to Squadray]

I find work a good distraction but it only works for a while. I've started to do a bit of meditation as I'm hoping over time I can become more comfortable with just being who I am and accept the things I have no power to change. I find it helpful sharing here. You might find you can also help others which can feel good and make you feel more connected. I've started reading again which takes me to a fantasy world for a few hours. Maybe you could think about things you might enjoy... Even crazy out there things!

[fauxartist in reply to Squadray]

this is never an easy answer for me because the ups and downs of emotion vary depending on what's going on in my life stress wise. Frankly on the days I'm going through a down turn, I like to write or clear my head in the garden, or go for a drive if I am up for it. If it's really a dark day....I just try to remind myself this too shall pass....and what my head is telling me isn't what's really wrong....I try to look for reasons to be so down....but the reality is it's chemical imbalance....I do take SSRI's that level out the down days a bit....but it's just part of the disease management to remember the blues will pass.

[Hidden]

Help is here. We will take you seriously. Maybe you can express your feelings through a poem, a picture you can upload, or write a song? You will find much kindness, open-mindedness and very little judgment here. (I say very little because while I know that most of us on here would never judge you, I cannot guarantee that for everyone. Bad apples are everywhere.) But these are the qualities that I have found on this site so far. If you really do not know where to start, can you make a list if that feels comfortable? Like list your symptoms, diagnosis or medicines (whatever you are comfortable with) Or maybe just how you feel in general about your life? Or struggles and fears? Dreams that you've had? Anything you are confused about? There are many places you can start, and you can start with a little and then add more, and you can find many listening hearts here. Just start wherever you are comfortable. We don't want to push you, we just want to help you. I hope these ideas help!! ; )

[Squadray in reply to Hidden]

You know what I think a list might actually be a great idea. I know there's no judgement but I still feel kind of stupid for feeling the way I do. I think alienated is the best word to describe how I feel on a day to day basis. But I'm going to take your advice and create that list Thank you!

[Dabela]

Hello Squadray and welcome! I really can’t think of anything to say that hasn’t already been said but I just wanted to also extend my hand out and say if you ever wanted to talk to someone you can message me anytime. For me depression can feel like it’s eating me alive and like it will take everything from me until there is nothing left. And it can be really isolating. I’m so glad you’re here and I hope it can provide some relief just to know you’re not alone 😊

[Squadray in reply to Dabela]

Every response I've gotten has lifted my spirits in some way shape or form, including yours. I'm 100% going to take you up on that offer (So I hope you meant it) :).

[Dabela in reply to Squadray]

When I read you’re response I smiled from ear to ear lol so yes I promise I meant it! ❤️

[AmIHappy]

hi welcome to this community ! actually i have joined this community 1 june only! But feel free to share your thoughts and we will also share as we sail on the same boat! It is not easy to communicate who dont understand us but here most people will understand for sure!!