Day 4 and still going strong, not even tempted to go back.

[Katdoll1987]

It's really not even bothering me that I've quit. The first time i tried it was absolutely horrible. But i made it 7 months. Maybe it's easier this time because i know now what to expect? I know it gets easier and that i won't always be consumed by cravings. But also I'm in so much pain which makes it easy to say no to cravings. Extremely painful swallowing and sore throat on one side, ear pain and excessive coughing and throat clearing. All on the right side. I go back to the ENT on the 4th. They've been putting me on antibiotics and steroids for the last 6-8 months with no relief. I've been going through this so long i can't even remember when it started anymore. They've ruled out strep, ear infection, I've been also treating it as post nasal drip or allergies by taking clariton and nasal spray. I'm doing salt water gargles and drinking special teas for sore throats. Nothing takes it away. I had a CT scan 2 weeks ago that came back normal but I'm not convinced. I think the next step will be endoscope. I pray they give me one soon. I need relief from this pain. I'm afraid the list of possibilities is running short. I worry for my little boy if i am sick. He's handicapped and depends on me for everything in his life. He can't speak or care for himself. He's only 14.. My grandmother was diagnosed with throat cancer at 35. Im 32. I don't know what else to think anymore. My husband tells me not to jump to conclusions but as everything else is being ruled out and there's not much left it can be it's getting hard to think positive. I have so much fatigue now i can barely function. My husband has been picking up all the slack around here and i feel so terrible about it. Even walking across the hall from my bed to the bathroom exhausts me. I'm really afraid.. Oncology and Hematology have been monitoring my white blood cell count for a while now last check i jumped from 15,000 to 20,000 in a week. I've lost 30 pounds in the last few months without trying. I feel sick and afraid. I'm sorry everyone i have nobody else to talk to about this. My husband is really the only one who knows. I haven't told my family or parent's any of this. I don't want them to be afraid and sad and i don't want their pitying me. I just don't want to be in this much pain anymore. I can't function it hurts so bad. I hope everyone else is doing well and going strong. Please stay quit. Cigarettes really do kill.

[Briarwood Administrator Ducky]

Hi Kat, you’re doing really well on day 4 and getting all those feelings off your chest is a very good idea. It’s a lot to deal with at the moment but hang in there, stay strong and let’s hope you can get relief from the pain soon.

Lots of healing hugs coming your way and keep up that great quit🚭✅😘

[Hidden]

Bless your heart hon you are going through a lot to be so young but welcome to the group and we will do our best to help 😊.. but not smoking is a great start hon..😊😊❣️😎

[Okradon 8 MONTH WINNER]

Stay strong Kat. You’re going through a lot, but smoking will only make things worse. You are a winner!

[Corrina125 LONG TERM WINNER]

Hang in there Kat, I know you are going through an awful time and my heart goes out to you. Sending you virtual hugs and thoughts xxx

[louloubelll LONG TERM WINNER]

Dear katdoll, i know its hard not to think the worst, i think its human nature to do so. Im so sorry you are not doing well and in so much pain😞. It could be one of those nasty viruses. Im happy to hear you have a great husband who looks after things , thats fantastic. How is your boy doing? I hope well. Im sending healthy happy😁 vibes to you 🌼 and positive thoughts too🌞🌞🌞

[Katdoll1987 7 MONTH WINNER in reply to louloubelll]

My little guy is doing so well! He's back in public school in the middle school after spending 4 years in a private school only for children with disabilities. He's doing so great with all the typically developing children and being included with them. I'm so proud of him!

I don't believe what i am experiencing with my throat is a virus. I've been dealing with this roughly 6-8 months now. I've been on so many antibiotics and steroids and also tons of antihistamines to dry up mucus incase this is a post nasal drip issue. None of it takes away the symptoms and they keep getting worse. I just don't know what else to think anymore. Doctors have ruled out strep throat, ear infection, bad tonsils, tonsil abscess. I don't know what else is left. I see the ENT tomorrow night so I'll see what he says. Again.. 😞 my primary care doc thinks i need an endoscope done. I know I'm young but we have a heavy family history of cancer. My grandmother had throat cancer and a trachea surgery lost her voice box by the time she was 35 years old. No matter what's wrong i will fight it and stay strong. ❤ how have you been dear? It's been a long time!

[louloubelll LONG TERM WINNER in reply to Katdoll1987]

Dear Katdoll, I'm so happy to hear how good your son is doing❗🌞 our children's well being makes ours so much better😉. I understand your worry about cancer. If they find it , they will take care of it. Have faith that they will find whatever it is. I know it's hard to be positive, but it makes it so much more bearable🌹🐼. Keep us close and up to date as we want to be supportive🐱. It has been awhile since we've talked, it's good to have you back🌼🌼🌼❗

[Hidden]

Just checking in to see how your doing 😊😊

[Katdoll1987 7 MONTH WINNER in reply to Hidden]

I'm still in a lot of pain but I'm hanging in there! The worst part is I'm also healing from a hysterectomy that i had done November 18th. I'm still going strong not smoking tomorrow makes one week cold turkey. I've done it before but relapsed after 7 months. I know it takes a few attempts. My second attempt i relapsed after 2 months i believe. This is my 3rd attempt. I'm hoping it's my final one ☺ thank you for checking in on me! You're so sweet!

[Hidden in reply to Katdoll1987]

Good for you kat am sorry your in pain but am proud of you for not smoking..🍀🤗😊😎