I have sat staring at this screen wondering how to put everything into words that are not totally negative, angry and at the same time oozing low mood. I was diagnose with PTSD eight months ago. I thought okay couple of months I will be fine. WRONG. I am much much worse. The physical injuries I can live with but I have isolated myself and feel that this body I have lived with for 55 years is not my own and that when I try to do normal everyday things my body says NO. Categorically no by shaking vomitting dizziness. I have infected wounds on my body which will not heal as I rip away at them in my anxious state. I am booked in for counselling Late June. Referred by a nice lady at victim support. I am not a victim I am not weak as a rule. Always had a high risk career and now I am ashamed of my current clinical condition which has been the cause of me leaving the house a total of six times in the last 8 months. That was to walk my dogs in quiet solitary places.
This is not a question how to cure myself. It is to enable me to speak with people who understand because in my world they really do not.