Hi all,My mother in law died last week while I was away on holiday with my husband. She had been taken into hospital on new year's day with pneumonia and had contracted numerous other infections during her stay. My husband and his siblings are not on good terms due to disagreements about the care of his mum over the past few years. They have now shut him out of the funeral planning process. It breaks my heart to see him trying to grieve in isolation without the shared memories of his family. The last straw came a couple of weeks ago when one sibling rang the house to order my husband to visit the hospital by means of abusive and foul language. My husband, generally very easy going and accommodating, told the sibling that he would hang up if they continued to verbally abuse him. The sibling continued so he hung up. Since then his family have kept him in the dark about arrangements, not updating their group chat. Worse though is the visit from his brother, who he was very close to but who has lived abroad for most of his adult life, who is now taking the side of his other siblings. Since he has been back, he has only contacted my husband once to pass on his UK phone number. My husband had to ask when the funeral was, and has been given the bare minimum of information, not even knowing if he will be offered a place in a funeral car.
I understand grief affects people in different ways but it is so sad to be ostracised in this way.