I have found gifts that came from my experience also. Compassion for others, connection with animals, solid intuition, song writing and music to express feelings, helping others who struggle with the wisdom I have gained, and strong leadership because I had to take care of myself at a young age.
The tips you gave about the brain fog were great. I am currently in the recovery process and I have a way to go but I do acknowledge that gifts have come from my experience. I'm glad you brought this up. Thanks so much for helping me remember this.
Very nice. Yes compassion, and a connection with animals. I like that!
A wonderful idea to share these things!
After dealing with PTSD, I've learned how truly strong and courageous I am - I can confront and overcome, and I have gotten so much better at appreciating my strength.
I am less judgmental about what others have been through. Humility does that.
I have learned to live within myself and my needs to rest and recuperate - if an activity is not right for me, I have no problem saying "No thanks."
I am a truly blessed person with a lot of gifts, and it is my obligation to steward my gifts lovingly.
I've learned when a woman is not right for me, and how to walk away rather than start dating her.
Great! I think we may find some similarities in our experiences. Less judgmental that fits me too. PTSD may have some purpose. I know that sounds weird, but it is a part of who we are. I am trying to see how it makes me better too!
Absolutely - if PTSD feels like lemons, let's look at the lemonade! I think you've opened a great topic area. Absolutely - the PTSD has defined much of who I am.The way I say it is "I may have healed the wounds, but I'll always have the scars." That helps me see how I function in the world.
Years ago, I worked with a prison ministry. We'd go into a prison, and work with the inmates. They always accorded me tremendous respect. I didn't understand until later - they saw in me the intimate acquaintance with violence. It's just part of me.
Agree with most of whats been said! But find those scars inescapable. It's just there in the subconscious - there's no escaping it. Wish I could take a pill that dispensed of them lol
Whatamug1, science has proven that we actually can rewire the subconscious and so become more free despite the scars. There are some terrific, gentle alternative methods for this. Take a look here: HealMyPTSD.com/treatment
Thanks for the link - I think I'm at the point where I'm coping. Have noticed that I've talked about it all with people I trust. It was all such a long time ago & a breakdown over unrelated issues was the trigger. I never denied to myself what I knew to have existed but guess a very busy life inbetween gave me little time to acknowledge it (them). Funnily most of my life I've worked in sectors that empower ....from tinys through to adults & always knew why. So perhaps, guess I'll never really know, it may have helped. Thx Ann
So glad you posted this, Adjunctbear! Great things already listed. I would add:
I trust myself more deeply because I know I have what it takes to survive.
I believe in myself more actively because I've proven I can endure and overcome.
I honor myself more often because I've earned my own respect.
I give love more freely because I'm more connected to the importance of the present moment.
I offer more kindness and compassion because I understand deep pain.
I speak up for and protect myself because I know I am my best advocate.
Yikes, I could keep going and going. Posttraumatic growth is a very real event after trauma and the fun thing about it is that it keeps continuing to evolve.
Good point, Chilli. I talk about the scars, but I haven't revisited that idea for a while. Maybe I'll start saying "I'll still have the awareness." A new limb - I like that idea.
Yup, it's an odd thing to realize I'm perceived as a tough guy. But I do know this, people don't mess with me, like you're saying. It's shifted since I did a LOT of anger work - I'm a lot more mellow - but evidently some of that aura is still present.
Funny story about that tough guy thing. I was walking around Chinatown in New York City. I stopped and took out my map, because I wanted to get to the Jewish Lower East Side Museum. I was trying to be subtle with the map, so I would look inconspicuous and not too obviously like a tourist. (Subtle, wearing reading glasses, mind you).
I glanced up, and there were two burly guys staring at me pretty hard. They were dressed like construction workers, and looked pretty tough. I'd been in town for a couple of days, so I knew a little about how to interact.
I just looked back and said "What?"
One of the guys looked real intently at me for a moment, like he was trying to figure something out. Then he said "Are you someone famous?"
I laughed real loud, and said "Only in my house."
They started laughing too, and we had a fun moment over it.
I'm more able to be the open and gentle soul I really am, instead of putting up high walls to protect myself.
Yes, I'm feeling more comfortable with awareness than scars, now that you mentioned it.
Interesting, Chilli, how much happened in those interactions you had on a non-verbal level. So much communicated with eye contact, even to the 'goodbye' signal.
Very true about guys proving themselves. When I did the prison ministry thing, they sent us to one unit where the inmates were all 18 to 22 - they called it a gladiator farm, because the kids were always bulling up to each other and fighting. You could feel the hubris floating in the air.
Later I went to a unit where the guys were all serving life sentences. They were very polite, quiet and there was much less tension in the air.
There's a whole level of interaction with guys that makes for an interesting dynamic to watch. I was told that when I felt threatened, I used to have a "rattlesnake look." Like we've been talking about, I didn't know I did that for many years.
It seems like we have all grown (and in in similar ways) because of PTSD. Not to offend anyone, but I also think PTSD helped me turn more to "God" or a higher power. It seems to me that PTSD is kind of like a spiritual attack (dark forces against us? Maybe?) Anyway I now have to lean on my faith more than ever and turn to religion which I may never have done without my experiences. For that I say Thanks because I think I have seen pure evil "satan" "dark forces" and I never want that in my life again!
I have developed many of the same strengths that you report. Imperfectly but there are real strengths. People always comment on it - especially when they learn something of my background. It has driven me to seek healing in every conceivable way to try and pass on that learning to my two adult children. I am kinder, more compassionate, more patient, less self-destructive and ready to relate to others' troubles. This is a great post. Focussing on the positives is good for all of us.
Thank you for your post and your willingness to open your heart to share. Ptsd is overwhelming me and I am sure their will be more gifts to report maybe later down the road. I am still in the bargaining stage of a lot,of sadness and how I lost my innocence as a innocent lil boy many years ago. So there is a lot of pain and challenges to face today. But the good thing I am thankful for is that ptsd or post traumatic injuries is treatable and can be healed and the emtional symptoms can be completely healed. If we work for that end. For that I am grateful. I am in this process like others in this group. Thank you friend.
Great post, I think PTSD helps me to be a better driver, more empathetic with people and better at facilitating an autism social group in my area. I have even identified abuse victims and helped them to have safer lives due to my experiences. I also appreciate life and feel without PTSD my autism wouldn't have been identified because I was shy and retiring before the PTSD.
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