Hi all, I really need a rant, not so much fibro but husband orientated!
As many of you will know I'm due to get my divorce on Friday & thought that the finishing post was in sight, but it seems that my husband isn't ready to give up graciously!
He phoned me to say that a letter was on its way by email. He was kind, asked about my health & said that he'll always be there for me blah bla blah.
As soon as I read the sugary first lines I knew that this was one of his carefully worded lettters, sent with poison on the arrow!
He's turned everything around.
I had to leave the house after needing to call the poice to stop him smashing up my property.
As usual when the police arrived he was smiling & calm & told them that it was all in my head,
This is something I've had to put up with for years.
On paper he was my carer, but in reality he was an extremely selfish, lazy bully. Despite me getting more & more disabled he wouldn't lift a finger.
Anyway, I won't bore you with all of that , I moved out & couldn't ever face going back, filed for divorce the house was put up for sale & apart from the odd snarling moan from him we both got on with our lives,
Rightly or wrongly I wrote to him giving him 7 days to decide how we were going to sort out our possessions because it needs to be agreed before our divorce absolute.He's been promising to do it for nearly 3 months & I'd run out of nice ways of asking him.
I can't explain how horrible his letter was but all totaly sugar coated. His main rant has been that I took all our treasured posessions. Yes I took a lot of ornaments, mostly those that were considered mine, I didn't take anything of his. When asked I returned a few bits that he particularly wanted. He is living in a 4 bedroomed detached house with no mortgage & is driving around in a car that we are both still paying for. He is saying to everyone how I left him with nothing - even put that on facebook!
He is stepdad to my 5 sons & we've been together nearly 30 years. I was acutely aware that he has no other children & I was afraid that my family would turn against him if they knew what he was like, so I told them the divorce was amicable & we were staying good friends.
He is a recovering alcoholic who for many years has been extremely manipulating & made my life a misery but for some reason I can't blacken his name to my family. Because they all live miles away it's been easy to keep up the pretence.
Now I'm so annoyed that he's going to make me work for money! I know that there are two sides to every story but I've stood by him through prison sentances, job losses & no end of problems, but told nobody. I've nursed him when he was ill, cleared up after he was drunk, did it all out of love, but that died quite a while ago, but I didn't have the courage to leave for good, now I have & don't regret it at all. But I'm so livid that he is after a few ornaments!
He is so changeable I never know where I am with him.
I feel too drained, too full of pain to cope with this nonsense. I just want to have a peaceful life, surely I'm entitled with that!
OK peeps, rant over, sorry but I had to tell somebody or I would have brooded on it & got very depressed or upset
Thanks for listening