Ohhh the indignity of it all!

I needed to wash my hair today, to most people it is a simple thing - jump in the shower and it is all over and done with in minutes.

Problem is my arms and shoulders ache something rotten today - teenage daughter to the rescue :-) .... I'll sit in the bath and she'll shampoo and condition my hair.

So I get in the bath, kneel down, ugh the pain and am completely unable to do the swizzely thing to sit down. I can't even get in the bath - I could have cried!

So off I toddle, starkers (not a pretty sight I promise you) downstairs to the shower-room; daughter gets soaked washing my hair whilst I sit on the shower chair (she is an angel) but at least I have clean hair.

It is the indignity of little things like not being able to do my own hair that really gets to me some days.

Julie xx

14 Replies

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  • Know just how you feel I never dry and style my hair now just can't be doing with the pain so my hair always looks like a startled badger. I just wish humans were naturally bald be easier and cheaper :)

  • Yes it is and i have the help too ohh the shame hehe .. Well i have to laugh or i may just start digging quickly ..

    I got worse since last wk as in like you with arms, shoulders beck to get the other bits done a little awkward.

    To think not so long back was dying my hair and running around.

    Just like a light switch it changes. So where does it go from here.

    Bed wash . I had a shower put in but knowing what i know now, i think i would of asked from ss or done via Dr instead of using what bit money had to do it.

    Hope you get more ease soon. I just spoke Dr on phone and now up dose agAin , it helps feel more alive lol .. Skipperdy dooo darr skipperdy deee .. Errm perhaps not lol

    Out kids are gr8 i havd daughters 21 &11 . The 11yr old takes over and acts more like mum haha xxx worth more than a million in Gold

  • I too had a shower put in specifically for me five years ago, (removed the bath completely, as I couldn't get up and down in it anyway). Got a nice local plumber to do the job, looked fantastic after, cost a fortune, NOW I dare hardly use it!! Turns out he never sealed the floor before the installation, so every time we use the shower the tray is moving, and it leaks through my kitchen ceiling! Someone has suggested contacting my council to see if they would put it right for me, or put in a wet room, I'm not sure it's worth even asking, to be knocked back, but can't afford to do anything myself now, so just have to wait until the kitchen ceiling caves in eventually, and hopefully claim for it all on the insurance! My grandson insists on daily showers, (he's 16), so i usually have strip washes now rather than more leaks into the kitchen. but for my hair wash, my sink has a tall mixer tap, it's brilliant, I can get my head underneath, so I can just manage to wash my hair, drying is another matter though. I sometimes use the dry shampoo as well in between washes to make it less often that it needs doing.

  • no just how you feel, julie, i can't get in bath or out now so i av a shower with safety rails, as for my hair i let a mobile hairdresser do it every now and again, in between my friend does it for me. along with shopping cleaning even has to help me put socks and shoes on and dress a lot of times now, i hate having to have people help but it is just too much for me now.i have always been independent and find it so hard to have to have help. just as well i av found a good friend. tc soma x

  • Oh bless you Julie, I am sure we all have been in the hair washing situation at some time or other, I know I have. I asked my younger teenage son to help me wash my hair one day when I was feeling really bad and hurting all over. To say there was a house deluge is an understatement, I couldn't believe how far the water and shampoo foam had travelled! Bless him he did a great job with my hair but with two dogs charging round the kitchen, dining room and back lounge (shower room is downstairs, we didn't tackle the bathroom upstairs), we had foam and water everywhere! My son mopped it all up and the dogs fell asleep after so a great time was had by them lol! ;)

    I daren't try getting into our bath in our bathroom, it's a deep slipper bath and far too high for me. Hubby bought it for me before I had Fibro and I used to love wallowing in there, I really miss it. Thankfully where we are moving to has a low corner bath, I can't wait to have a bath again.

    It's hard accepting that we need help with some things isn't it. However if we have help on hand, we mustn't be too proud to take it! Every little helps as they say. :)

  • Feeling for you hun. I have had the worst year with such long hair(to my bum) and head sweats. like lots of you my arms, neck are bad. It would take 2 days to get over washing hair and then it needed doing again. A month back I had it cut short, I hated having to but love it now. Even when I cannot shower i can wash my hair with a soapy sponge. So easy (and I feel like a punk again, ha).

    Take all the help you can to make life less painful. As LibbyDee says. X

  • hi i have a shower over the bath and i use a seat that fits over , its a lot easyer and its nice having the hot water runing down my back and neck , it might help if you used one, suexx

  • hi Julie. I've just got some dry shampoo the batiste original. it's certainly not the same but it makes me feel a bit less itchy until I can eventually manage to wash my hair and shower. big hugs. xxx

  • I use that Bertie - it leaves my hair looking and smelling lovely, one of my secret weapons lol

    Julie xx

  • Yes me too - what a find!! Since I have my hair short now, as I can't cope with it long anymore, and it's grey, so the Batiste dry shampoo is brilliant.

  • I've always managed to get in the shower to wash my hair, but there have been times where I've had to have my husband to dry it for me. Vidal Sasoon he's not, but I really appreciated him doing it for me. I have a short bob now so it's easier to manager. I sympathise with no end though. Having nice hair is so important to a woman and how we feel generally. xxx

  • Hair washing is a problem but I have to do it somehow. Easier at the moment after having two months in Australia where the pain was considerably less and I was very nearly as active as before FM started.

    My hair should be washed daily as it gets greasy easily in 24 hours. 48 hours and I look like a disheveled down and out. I would kneel on the bathroom floor and lay across the edge of the bath and just about manage that way, getting down and up again being the biggest problem. One of my showers has a fixed head but the taps have seized up due to lack of use. Maybe using the shower head fixed on it's bracket may help some of you?

  • Hi there, when I was first diagnosed some four years ago with Fibro. I had to have carers in to look after me as my husband did not know what to do as I was screaming in pain and confined to bed.In the early days the caers and I devised very plans to get round things like washing hair.If this help anyone out there this is what we did.First you need two quite deep washing up bowls and a jug of warmish water.Now laying flat on your back in the bed with your head supported by someone, just over the edge of the bed get someone to pour the warm water out of the jug over your hair and catch the water in one of the washing up bowls.Then shampoo your hair then get a fresh jug of warm water to rinse hair again in the washing up bowl.Repeat if necessary or to put on conditioner.SORTED.The other way, which I cannot do is to kneel outside the bath and use the shower off its supportive hook to wash hair over the bath.I am, like most of us not able to get in or out of a bath so have to shower.Hope this is of some use to you fibromates out there.

  • Hi Julieevh,

    I think when you get fibro, modesty and dignity have to go ..................unfortunately!

    After so many ops (shoulder ones) and fibro, I would have been lost without the help of my family! My daughters even know things like not being able to paint and cut my toenails really distresses me, I feel unkept! They have done that for me and shaved my legs and help me dress. It's so hard to ask for help, but I think our loved ones (if we are lucky enough to have them around. And golly I know how lucky I am) see us in so much pain and unable to take that away from us, like the feeling of doing something, rather than just watching. Although my hubby might not agree as he does soooo much for me, think he is permanently exhausted!!

    Hope you have had a better evening. X

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