Family gatherings

Hi all post Christmas readers.

Any of you done a family gathering this season?

For the love of children I deal with this event. Do not get me wrong it can be delightful.

My problem is this ......noise!

Just the fact there are more people ( I love them all) gives me more pain as noise levels get me going. Anyone else have this issue?

Noise and having to concentrate on what people are saying then try and enjoin in conversations is so very tiring.

I gave himself the nod to say lets go home when some of gathering would really have expected us to stay longer.

Travelling to/fro gathering also wipes the cream off the cake as it were.

12 Replies

  • Hi skit

    I think as we get older we become more sensitive to extremes of light, noise, temperatures and smells.

    I also think you have to be in the mood to enjoy a party. It always goes better when we have expectations of talking to friends or family we don't see often enough, and when we are hungry enough to enjoy the food too.

    If we don't really want to be there it is hard to smile and stick it out.

    Perhaps next time you can go to a quieter room to chat, and perhaps put your feet up. If your family know you get unwell from time to time I feel sure they would understand if you did not join in everything.

    On a brighter note, children do grow up eventually :)


  • Hi skit

    Yes I am the same with noise !!!!!

    My brother in law voice is loud and he does not stop talking !!!!!!!!!!!

    My CRPS pain is 10/10 😞 I kepted going upstairs to chill

    Then when I am downstairs again he sets my pain off again ,

    My injured arm goes all red then it goes all shiny then blisters starts coming on it ,

    The next day it's all calm 😊 And quite

    And my pain level have reduced to 7/10 😊

    6years since my work accident feels like a lifetime

    It has caused complex regional pain syndrome in left arm

    Take care

    Christine CRPS UK

  • Hi skit i am terrible with noise, I tell my oh to lower his voice sometimes and if I go to my sons I have to say can you turn tv down as it's blaring he has 3 loud women in his household and he's quiet himself. I love when grandkids are here but love the piece and quiet when there gone 😂 X

  • skit , I'm sorry the noise bothers you that bad. I do attend a family gathering of around 65 to 75 people and it is very loud, and even though it's my family it's do sent do my panic disorder very much good either.One the other hand it makes my mom and dad so happy I wouldn't have it any other way. I take my meds given by the Dr for panic and go and enjoy myself as I see the smile on my mom's face as she sees all her children, grands, and great grands all in one place. Talk to your Dr and see if maybe you can get some type of med to help, pills aren't the answer for everything but they can truly help in this situation. I wish you the best.Take care. Peck 🐤

  • Hi, I have just returned from a family gathering over Christmas. I stayed in a small semi with 10 people. It was very noisy and busy. It was my wifes family so I did it for her sake and my boys. I found it quite difficult, especially the noise.

    I have no energy now I am just collapsed in a chair. Is this normal. My son has just called me lazy!

  • Very normal!

    I think any out of the ordinary (well ordinary too) activity leaves us needing to recharge for a day. I'm still recovering from Xmas and it wasn't even taxing. I .declined an invitation to the theatre today, because it would be too much. Things that interfere with my meal times is also difficult, and theatre always does.

  • Yes, our family gathering before Christmas was very loud and it wiped me out for over a week afterwards. We opted to stay in a Travelodge to reduce the traveling.

    I read somewhere that hearing can become painfully acute with fibro (it has some fancy name).

    I was sat upstairs at the back of the house (double glazed) and could hear a plastic pot rolling on the ground in the wind (also noisy). It turned out to be at the front of the house furthest away from me. My OH now knows how much I can hear! 😂

    Volumes seem to be set at the same level of loud, so judging distance is hard. High pitched sounds are very painful and can make me feel sick.

    Just occasionally it's fun when we are out and I hear "interesting" snippets of conversations!

    Apparently, ear plugs can make it worse, as it is not a physical problem, but an overactive central nervous system issue, so I keep reminding my brain to turn the volume down. It's a work in progress!!!! 🤔

  • Thanks for reminding me, I like quiet and am also sensitive to voices; I have to avoid some people because of it. I tense up as I can feel their tension. I'll try to find my nervous system off switch.

  • Hi my friend

    I am so truly sorry that the noise gets to you, and I have noticed that I am the same these days and hate excessive noise. I want to sincerely wish you all the best of luck, and please take care of yourself.

    All my hopes and dreams for you


  • For many of us we have spent years with our condition and have managed to arrange our lives to suit, when we are exposed to different surroundings our bodies go into spasms of protest. Although I enjoyed the company I was glad to sink back into my comfy armchair in the quiet of my home later in the evening on xmas day where my body seemed to say thank goodness for that!

  • Agree totally, I have chronic migraines and s a result am sensitive to noise, light and smells. I find these things actually painful and cannot endure for any length of time. Luckily my family around me are quite small in number as most are in England or Wales and I am in Scotland. Spent quiet Christmas time with those I love.

  • Gosh you always think your on your own I've the same problem with noise and hate to admit I switch off my mum in law is deaf and speaks loud it grinds me I love her to pieces I'm so glad it's not just me noise and concentration I can't deal with

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