Lonely bored and ill

[SuzeWooze]

Who gets so fed up of things we need to do exhausting us, then having nothing fun to do or being unable to socialize.

I want to throw a brick through the TV, even my hobbies are depressing me, so low.

[rosewine]

It is a horrible feeling. I know all my friends are either on holiday or off doing things this bank holiday and I just about have the energy to do a bit of light gardening before sitting down exhausted.

I have literally given up on the TV it is such a load of rubbish half the time. I am surviving with reading. I will be glad when hopefully tomorrow I have finished my PIP form as that has been on my mind for weeks pulling me down.

Hope we both will be feeling w bit more chipper soon.x

[Steve49 in reply to rosewine]

Hi.

I'm so sorry things are not to great at the moment !!!

Yes tv is a waste off time, I leave mine off as it is hopeless.

Is there any help that I can help you with ???

Please let me know if I can help ???

Steve.

[rosewine in reply to Steve49]

Thanks so much Steve49 I just have tomorrow and then it has to be in the post. Strange I used to be an advisor and could literally fill in any form when I did AA forms I had a 100 per cent success rate but it is so difficult to be detached from your own situation. OH says I always downplay things and other people would have taken to their beds but it is just me. We had such bad experiences with ESA and my second wave of DLA. I am really mad that everyone has to go through this farce as indefinite should mean that unless something changes. What will be will be. Wish me luck.x

[Steve49 in reply to rosewine]

Hi.

Yes I will be keeping my fingers & toes crossed for you.

Gosh it must be strange sat on the other side off the fence !!!!

Yes my DLA ended up indefenant. "So much for that"

My ESA has been very strange to date as well.

Yes the more you do the less you get in this world.

When I had my last ESA the number off people trying to con the system was very strange.

I thought I was coming to a party as everyone was fine.

It's discusting really, as the ones that need it don't get it.

Steve.

[Hidden in reply to Steve49]

Hi Steve, I've just signed up too the ESA. Not sure now wheat her I should have or continued with my business and reduced it too a min and ask for more working tax credit. It was just feeling unmanable and I'd reduced my customers over the last 8 months .so I was just managing.but maybe that's better than the EsA process .some days in the mornings I'm good to go and get out..but the vastness of the symptoms pain dyspthsia and fatigue feeling and the depth of dispear as lead me down the path with the local mental health team. I don't know.. Personally, without work I know I can go down emotionally so that all means for me stay up and afloat and potentially find something I can do, but I m not sure what's up or down some days..if you know what I mean.

So I'm not sure what employers are going to take me on with the various other conditions I love need to place on my cv..

I've turned to CAB for help..who else did you use.thanks for your time.

[Steve49 in reply to Hidden]

Hi.

Yes that was the same as me, l was desperate to return to my office based work.

I had managed to start a new job in 2000 following my Stroke. I had got all the adaptions required at my work station.

But following some more brain surgery (SRS) in 2005 I was unable to return to work. My office was on the 2nd floor were I was unable to use my mobility scooter.

Yes I was great full that I didn't return to my previous job & I managed to start a new one instead.

The "Job Center" was a good start as they had someone to sort things out for me. Are you looking to return to your old job ??

Yes the "CAB" is your best start, have you sent your ESA form in ??? Have you sent any other benefit forms in eg: DLA/PIP ??

Sorry for all of the questions.

Please let me know if I can help you further ???

Steve.

[Hidden in reply to Steve49]

No all good ask away with me..

Thanks for your reply..

Yeah sea forms in and supporting evidence etc..

Depression with suspected FM is the basis at present for claim as I have got a diagnosis yet..which I'll need or need some specialist diangonise ..it all point to FM..

No I'm not looking at PIP at present don't qualify I imagine.. But that not the point..I want to go down avenues which are not appropriate fair or a true reflection of my present needs.

However not too creat a rod for own back I'm thinking yeah go back to what I do..that self employed but reduce reduce.and keep it simple

Esa with permitable work best option again either stay with what I have.

I don't feel I ass mind the eas test.

As much as I'm all the FM thing at my level and experience but I can do sometimes at present ..yet other times ..I'm down and out for want of a better phrase. The symptoms obvious are 24 /7 no doubting that..but who knows what the medical assessor will think.

Or Jsa..so I'm would be changing what I do..but that would be tricky I'd have too look hard or do some volunteering and hopefully get a foot in..because at the first Jsa meeting I'd be point out..yeah job that would be great but listen to this list of FM consideration and see what I can do

It's early days on the meds and I'm finding my way..depression and the sucicdal thoughts every day ..so plenty to reason to give myself the time I need., but time and tide waits for no man..

[Steve49 in reply to Hidden]

Hi.

Thanks yes that is the best way if you think you will be ok.

I did give it a good go but H/R said "no"

They were right there's no way as much as I loved my job to pieces.

It would have killed me in the end. I was p/t but I was out off my house all day with travel.

Sorry about mentioning "DLA"

Is there any help that I can offer in regards in regards off the depression & sucicdal thoughts ???

Steve.

[Hidden in reply to Steve49]

I don't know Steve on depression and suicidal thought..sometimes I'm taken by it mostly it just about..

I think the thoughts are quite natural considering the situation as the mind and whole system is saying..no way...your having a laugh..abort abort..

But that said and behind the humour ..in very vulnerable now ans shaken too the core about all this ..I cannot say how truly it will be for be.. Honesty is my key and then I wish I don't more..reaching out..

My meds need a look at particularly and anti depressant. But hey drugs cocktail ..what do ya do rock and hard place springs to mind..

I'm gonna get a doc appoint v soon.got a med with mental healt pharmacist appoint at the end a sept!.

Counscelling on its way..

All that said .this writing this now is helpfully..just this sometimes..I'm not sure about the thoughts like I say they seem fair too me..just about re inventing what I value in myself and why I want to continue to share with others..

I always wanted to find a partner again ..that has rocked me..it might not happen.is she out there..?.that makes me very sad.i don't know black and white thinking..

Strange really how the human mind thinks all this and I'm think a walk on the beach with someone by my side might help ease me and bring something into her life..

.

[Steve49 in reply to Hidden]

Hi.

That's great, I hope that I'm ok ???

Yes it is strange how the mind works.

As they say "Mind over Matter"

It's great to talk to you, yes you should "Say Never Say Never"

Good idea to see the doc, do you mind to let me know what meds are you on ???

Yes it is a rock & a hard place.

I'm not to keen taking meds but I know how bad things would be if I didn't.

Steve.

[Hidden in reply to Steve49]

I'm just on lyrica 75ml twice a day.

Occasional ibuprofen..

Omega 3

Magnesium

Primrose oil

Homeopathic remedy

Alpha lipoid Acid

Turmeric

B 12.

I take them through the day.

[Steve49 in reply to Hidden]

Hi.

That's great, do they all make a difference for you ???

Yes I'm currently looking at other ways to help me with my pain.

Steve.

[Hidden in reply to Steve49]

Honestly, I'm not sure.

Lyrica..totally no doubt..I may need to increase..but bring it on is my attitude.( also with a health dose of I'm not sure about meds and chemical and things). But could not cope with pai any more so that is that at the present.

Regards the other stuff..who know..I'm also concern its could be negative so I take some throughout the day or I don take the magnesium for a few days or alpha acid.

I've just read some articles and made it up ..scrambling about thinking find the magic potion.

But as I've read about similar things pop up and some of the folk writing I'm thinking at that point have an idea. I generally go to places where people are talking about there use and there experience..id didn't with the tumeric or the homeopathic remedy..

I think I need to look at it and be careful as I don't want to cause more disharmony. Not sure what the doc will say..ill tell her ..I don't know..I'm inclined to think some other time with consistent us will help and dis functional system.

i ve got know idea in the end..

[Hidden in reply to Steve49]

I'm also wondering like with some eastern meds that taking things at certain times of the day when organs and systems are more open is better or not to take them..not sure if this make any difference but better thinking on that than..maybe..

[Steve49 in reply to Hidden]

Hi.

Yes I think that's the way, if it helps with your pain that's what matters in the end.

Steve.

[SuzeWooze in reply to rosewine]

Thanks x the rollercoaster of emotions bubbles over sometimes then you realise just how hard it all us x books yes they help. I shall have to find a new one to read, any suggestions? 😃 Cheers for the response, take care, and lets hope tomorrow is more uplifting x

[Steve49 in reply to SuzeWooze]

Hi.

Yes it is very much like a roller coaster ride with plenty off ups & downs.

I suppose we both need some up lifting reads !!!!

I've turned to music as my therapy !!!!

No probs anytime !!!!

Let's hope for tomorrow !!!!

Steve.

[SuzeWooze in reply to rosewine]

Thanks x the rollercoaster of emotions bubbles over sometimes then you realise just how hard it all is x books yes they help. I shall have to find a new one to read, any suggestions? 😃 Cheers for the response, take care, and lets hope tomorrow is more uplifting x

Reply Like (0)

[rosewine in reply to SuzeWooze]

Just read the Thomas Harris Red Dragon which is a prequel to Hannibal Lector no wonder I don't sleep at night LOL. Had to read it for my Crime Book Club and didn't expect to enjoy it. I love the ones when they have to find an ancient artifact so you get a history lesson, crime and a bit of adventure all rolled in. Keeps boredom at bay that and watching the antics of the tropical fish. Take care of yourself.x

[Hidden]

Yeah..I wanna throw plate With out all the Greek dancing..actually that would be fun..but I might need too sit down occassionally.

I hope ya thinking of rubber bricks... And not at a plasma..you'll be scratching you head in the morning..

[BlueMermaid3]

Hi there

Unfortunately the pain and fatigue can really get us down at times. Especially on Bank Holidays when everyone else seems to be out enjoying themselves.

Please do join in with any posts or games going on. Everyone is always welcome and you can end up making new friends.

Wishing you a much better day tomorrow and a restful night tonight.

Lu xx

[SuzeWooze]

Still learning how to deal with anger, I let things build up. Anyway no bricks just the switch off😃 yes smashing plates would be good and I'd LOVE some dancing if I could!

[Hidden in reply to SuzeWooze]

Yeah me too anger greaving process ..I'm bouncing between anger depression and sadness..I hope ya have some release some how.

[Hidden]

I know what you mean, I can't settle to do any of my hobbies at the moment and the TV is awful now.

It's so frustrating, but I have started swimming again, just do a little bit and that gets me out of the house and makes me feel I'm doing something to help myself. The jacuzzi is great too.

I'm sure we will soon get back to doing our hobbies etc.

Good luck and best wishes.

[SuzeWooze in reply to Hidden]

thanks, im so tired now hope going to sleep x swimming is great, i have a knee injury but hope i weill get back in the water again soon x

[Hidden in reply to SuzeWooze]

Hope so 👍😊

[Hidden]

So difficult for all of us we all get low in pain bored with the life pain so we help each other when we can I'm sorry you are so low Iv been that way my self I can say is do you best tone happy

[albinohedgehog]

Hiya , too tired for proper reply atm but i know how you feel, it sucks. X

[SuzeWooze in reply to albinohedgehog]

thanks anyway, hope you get some energy tomorrow and lets bothe feel better, take care xxx

[albinohedgehog in reply to SuzeWooze]

Heya. I really struggle with boredom, and atm am feeling like my lifes quite empty. I struggle to find friends who understand or who i feel on the same wavelength with. I literally dont have any friends who i see regularly now. Hoping to volunteer at oxfam for a couple of hours a week but ive got a feeling itll be too exhausting. Its a bit of a struggle staying posituve.

So basically i am in similar situation and i understand.

Xx

[SuzeWooze in reply to albinohedgehog]

Volunteering sounds good, its always worth trying something x I find if I have managed to get to my art class I really enjoy it and the positivity gives me energy x hope you give it a try x

[TheAuthor]

I know exactly where you are coming form my friend. There is so much that I want to do and I am physically incapable of doing it these days! I want to sincerely wish you all the best of luck, and please take care of yourself.

All my hopes and dreams for you

Ken

[Hidden]

Been up since 2.30 am..I'm not sure how too negotiate all this ..it's all very new for me in many respects..A unvering anxiety has come fortunately it has passed. It all very real..

I'm not sure even it is ok too share this as I don't wish to worry others.

All very disturbing.

[SuzeWooze in reply to Hidden]

It's ok to share I am a newbie to but I also used myfibroteam so am used to having a rant, it needs to be done am I for one, I'm sure others are too don't worry as we are all in the same boat some way or another xx

[Hidden in reply to SuzeWooze]

Thankyou for the reassurance, I think I'm paranoid at times..

Feeling very insecure and dreadfully lonely..my tears are just deepening and deepening..I'm stomach feels quite heavy afterwards.im almost numb..

I feel that that's it..and how what who when...

Yet I know when I get out and feel the sun (not very consciously as I'm just a blob initially.)I do start to come out and my symptoms feel more manageable.Now since I've got back I can feel the sysmtoms flowing in..and obviously this deepen on how much I do ..it a mine field..

[Patdoyle]

Know exactly how you feel . I am sitting here feeling much the same. All my family gone away for the weekend and just seen pictures on Facebook which makes me realise what I am missing. Bank holidays are bad when you can't do stuff. I just tried to clean some windows and went all weak and shaky so back to sitting down. It's hard to keep positive I know but we h ave to.

[milo4]

Hi

so sorry to hear your feeling lonely bored, I know how you feel about tv.

For the past few weeks I have been stuck in doors, and wrists painful hurts to even message. So tv was about the only thing, but I have turned it off today as I can't take anymore rubbish lol.

Hope you feel better soon,

Trace x

[Hidden]

Thankyou, I'll try the bath. I've had an OK morning really.i take out some dogs occasional.i stand and throw the ball. I find if I don't get out and as I live alone I can sometimes go deeper into a depressive state.yet at the same time I have to be alone and rest and actually sometimes I know I prefer it.I do miss converstion and someone to be with..

I'm grieving so much I think

[Joyia in reply to Hidden]

Dogsnoozer wouldn't it be nice to have someone to talk to sometimes, I don't mind my own company but too much makes you feel isolated. Our culture tends to place people in their boxes alone. There was an interesting documentary some time ago on the slums of Mumbai, as you can imagine there were many deprivations but as families of all generations lived together they did not suffer the many mental health problems we do as loneliness was not encountered.

[Hidden in reply to Joyia]

I like my own company more mower days or wether that also I just cannot put up with others sometimes is probably more too the point..I'm sure people can say same about me..I love a lover and friend wrapped into one. But hey ho..I'd like an island in the Indian Ocean but I'm not sure that my vision board can cope with that one just yet.

Yeah I wonder if it's what we get used too.ref to mental health and communities.. The mind learns to cope..deprivation abuse loss isolation or communication love allowed to fail..

I imagine folk in the slums are together get out of adversity and nececity.What else..and regions become a way out for the mind to make sense and meaning from it..like I may have thought having a new things or gadget would make me feel more whole or better ..others turn to religion..

But success on prosperity turns way from community and its challenges an more towards things and boundaries..trips to B and Q to make my garden look better..than it was or there's..

Spending time spending as apposed looking at why I spend..what I really need .what is it rellacing what is it I really need. on some level the FM trip bring that whole deal back to reality..

Yeah I'll treat myself to something ,but I know it's not gonna help me through understanding this pain or hear me cry or share a similar experience..I think the FM story for me is based out of bout just mine or my families but also societies need not to look at its self and go..people are important over stress..demands things titles property..

If ya don't have communities that look after folk first and community first and then we get lost..I have my life I feel has been a bit of a car crash..

Guides mentors wise voices in communities that come together regularly and with similar understands in a world and reality that is Familar and can be understood helps to for people out of adversity and accept it and have the self respect love interdependant factuality to say I belong to rather I am better than and want to be seperated from others..our culture can learn a lot from others as said I'm sure the other way around..in Indian there is so much people child trafficking and abuse of untold stories who have died before their name was know.

[Dexter927]

I like many people on this forum can feel where you're coming from! 😉 Just writing about myself even irritates me,Lol. My boyfriend doesn't get me at all or suffer (luckily) from any illnesses. So, of course he isn't very empathetic to any of the issues we all cope with daily. In the U.S I have to deal with running around from one pharmacy to another in order to fill my scripts with a generic that isn't crap. This has become a problem everywhere it seems around the world. As if we're not going through enough. But, I try to read to escape while other's are out seeing new movies or eating out, etc. It truly does suck when your always the one that has to decline going out. Although, Boone really bothers to invite me anymore. Another thing that helps me is finding a funny series on Netflix and watches it throughout the day. Laughter is supposedly a natural pain reliever, supposedly. My profile pic (I'm a newbie) is several months old so it's not indicative of my usual state of being. Re-watching older show's is often fun. Like Futurama! 😂 So silly. Well I'm going to attempt a trip to the store but, I hope you feel better and know you're have people thinking of you!