I am sick and tire of being sick and tired. Anything i do like go to the post office or doctor for a simple prescription refill caused extreme exhaustion. The next day my legs hurt so bad. I have to stay in bed almost all the time. I hate being sick and now I am out of money. I have applied for assistance of all kinds but have gotten nothing. All my bill are overdue and my family has no understanding how hard it is to get through each day. Lately I'm having to take more pain pills but am afraid to tell my doctor because it's a controlled substance. I fear I will run out and then I will really be in pain. My insurance has denied my doctors visits because it's pre- existing. So I don't know if he will even see me with an outstanding bill. When I can't pay the light bill I don't know where I will go. I know my family does not want to take me in. They never visit me and I get only text from them maybe once a month. My meds give me IBS and I have anxiety. I've seen many doctors and they can't damn thing. I want to scream. I pray and ask why, what can I learn from this but I can't think of a dn thing. I cry, I yell, I sleep and I hurt. I have no joy, feel like I have no future. Why. That's all I want to know. If there was a reason for my pain it would at least help. Even cancer patients know why they hurt but not us. Right now I hate my life but cannot do anything about it. The end.