Feeling so bad

Hi there,haven't been on here for a bit,mainly because of all the changes but if I don't get some things off my chest I'm going to explode.

I feel incredibly low again,have had a horrid week with fibro,migraines,pain,nightmares and the most awful ibs. I'm having noise problems with my neighbours and I'm feeling totally unsupported in every way. It's my mums birthday today and she would have been 83. I miss her so much,life is horrid without her. But life has to go on.

One of my dogs is driving me crazy with her whinging,it's off and on all day and I do all I can to try and get her settled. The vets have said she has the onset of dementia.

I've been doing a long term pain course but instead of helping I'm feeling worse! How can that be? I've also seen a mental health nurse but they wanted to double my lyrica dose which I tried but that made me feel drunk.

I get no support for the family I have left,absoloutely none. I've tried keeping in touch but I've given up now,it just feels horrible to be rejected.

So it's just me and my kids and thank goodness I have them. I'm trying to cling onto that. I feel like a total freak. What on earth is wrong with me?

10 Replies

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  • Oh dear you poor thing we need less stress don't

    We or else we feel worse, as for IBS it's the pits.

    I don't think anyone understands fibro unless you

    Have it I long ago accepted that and dont bother to

    Expect anything from anyone, that is why forums are

    So good as we are all the same.

    As for your mum I do understand that I was very very

    Close to my mum as well, you never forget and it never

    Really gets better, you just begin to accept things, and

    It begins not to hurt so much. It does not mean you

    Don't love her you will always.

    I hope you feel better soon we go through this every

    Now and again don't we and although the pain never

    Goes you learn to live with it, and most times you cope

    But some times we can't and need the help of others

    In the same position don't we

    Love Viv

  • Hope you start to feel better, I understand how you feel. Know one other than "our fibro frinds" know how we are. So sorry about your Mum, and your dog. Keep yourself close to your children. Big hugs

    Jan x

  • Hello. HelloTeddysmum

    Storey to hear you are so low at the moment. Glad you have co.e on though we are always here for a chat and advise or help. Sometimes it is just good to have someone listening. I am sorry about your dear mum she we always be with you looking after you .

    Keep you spirits up and care x gin

  • So sorry you are feeling so low, we all get our 'bad' times. A lot of us on here seem to be going through flares at the moment and feeling stressed. We are all here to listen.

    I miss my Mum terribly, so know how you feel there.

    Take care, look after yourself xx

  • Hi Teddysmum. It is understandable why you are feeling as you are. I can fully sympathise with you and your situation. It isn't easy being on your own with young kids, but they are good to be with and give me a purpose (even if they do make me pull my hair out!). Feelings are heightened when there is a special day relating to a family member or friend we have lost. That will make everything seem so much worse. How long have you been feeling like this? Do you get a break from the kids?

    My GP changed my anti-depressant to duloxetine. It took me a few weeks to get used to it but I feel so much better now. I used to get really upset about what little family I have not staying in touch, getting paranoid about it, but I decided to put that effort into something worthwhile, my kids.

    I hope you feel better soon and that you don't have to cling on quite so hard.

    Take care, Is x

  • Thank you so much for replying,Suffolk lass your so right about feelings being heightened on birthdays. My nephew got married yesterday(on my mums birthday) I was invited but as they live over 200 miles away I couldn't go as travelling is too much for me. So had a double whammy yesterday,I didn't realise it was going to upset me so much. Then my kids(they are both teenagers by the way) went to their dads yesterday,always a dodgy time for me and with being ill all week it was just all too much. Also next Friday they are going away with him for a week and I always find it hard,panic attacks mainly which are pretty horrible. Every time they go I think"right come on Alison keep strong" but it never quite works out. I do so wish I wasn't so sensitive and I do have to give myself a good talking to.xxx

  • Hi there Teddysmum

    I really feel for you. My ex husband (of 28 years) and my children's dad died 3 years ago on 29th August. Our children were 9 & 13 at the time. I get so bad on the anniversary. I'm so sorry you miss your mum so badly.

    I wasn't sure if I got it right ~ were you saying that you don't like your children going away because you miss them so much?

    I am the same when my children visit what's left of my family.

    Like you I have family problems. I have 4 sisters and only one of them speaks to me. I've tried apologising for something that wasn't even my fault and they still won't speak to me.

    I've done the same as you and put my efforts into my children.

    If you ever need a chat please don't hesitate to private message me.

    It's quite incredible how our Fibro community have so much in common with each other apart from having FMS. We're all here for you. I felt so depressed a few days ago that I didn't want to be here anymore. I had so many wonderful messages of support from everyone on here. I think I had about 3 hours sleep last night, probably like most of our Fibro friends and the fatigue certainly doesn't help our mood does it?

    Please please get back to me if you miss your children when they're away. I get the same. When my children went to Turkey for 2 weeks with their Auntie & Uncle I was beside myself with grief ~ so I do know how you feel. We can talk more about it.

    Take it easy.

    Hope to speak to you again soon

    Gentle hugs

    Coz x

  • Hi Alison. I just picked up your message. Have you got some good friends you can get in touch with when you feel like this? You sound as if you're in a place where I've been, it isn't nice. If you want to speak any time then we can get something sorted and get phone numbers exchanged. I see Eli50 says the same. People on this site are here to help, so let us.

    Take care and keep as strong as you can.

    Is x

  • Hi darling,

    If you would like to talk to me personally, I am happy to email it to you. If you send a private message to me here with your email, I will send my land line to you.

    I had Samaritan training, albeit some time ago. My own health got worse, and I have severe coccyxdynia, which means pain on sitting, so I had to give it up. I could not manage the shits - too much sitting.

    Elizabeth.

  • Oh what lovely messages I am so touched,really means a lot. Thank you so much for the offers of help,I really could do with some shoulders at times,I get so panicky thinking I'm on my own with all this. I have two friends,they both have fibro,one lives nearby so I do see her but the last few weeks she has backed off,she has bi polar so I think she needs to sometimes as she has her own problems. My other friend keeps in contact regularly by phone but she lives too far away to see and I find talking to her quite hard as she can do so much more than me and has a pretty exciting life,which makes me feel quite insignificant.

    Coz am so with you on the missing the children thing. Don't get me wrong I quite like it for a few days then I go downhill as you can only cope with so much peace and quiet. Actually I don't get that much peace and quiet as the kids next door are in their garden screaming most days unless its raining. I feel like I'm going to go round the bend! I just don't know what to do about it I really don't.

    Ali xxx

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