Really really bad

[Teddysmum43]

I'm so so sorry to do this to you guys,I've just come off the phone to the Samaritans. I woke up with a terrible panic attack at 4.30 that just won't go. Tried to fight it but I just couldn't. So thought I would ring Samaritans but I've ended up getting myself even more upset just talking about stuff. What is happening to me? I don't know what to do I honestly don't. I've tried the counselling and it's not helping yet. I don't feel like I can carry on with this life. What is the point? But I know when I come out of this panic I won't feel this bad. This virus I've got has really dragged me down. I just want this all to stop this feeling so unwell every day. I need someone to listen to give me some practical help,being so on my own is killing me literally. I'm so embarrassed I feel like this,I'm a very private person and I hate asking for help. I've got my 16 year old daughter here with me and I don't want to put any pressure on her. I'm so bloody frightened and I don't know where to go for help.

[deby10]

hi teddysmum43, so sorry to read how ur feeling, myself also been up since 5am, not feeling to good, not sleeping an all the rest, pain 9 out of 10, but may i say i,m not feeling as as bad as you, i know when my sons were 16, i did,nt like to put, my problems to them, i found it was a wrong move, they need to know, how you are feeling, this day an age 16 yr old understand, more then we understand, that they understand, so please give it a little go, an speak to your daughter, it may help alittle, who better, then your own, sooner or later they are going to hav,t to know how your feeling, now that my sons know they way i,m feeling most days, they try to help an understand, which i,m greatfull for, i do hope you feel much better as the day goes on, xx

[Hidden]

Hi TM here I am posting from bed, still laid low by this virus , its really horrible so I know its not helping how you are feeling ... I know you are having councelling but I don't know what sort and maybe if its dealing with long ago problems perhaps bringing them to the surface with everything you have going on right now it isn't the best thing to be adding more for you to bear..... With that in mind have you been to your GP and spoken to them .. Not about FM and your aches and pains .. Put them to one side as a separate issue and just go to your GP ASAP and explain exactly how bad mentally you are feeling...

Obviously I don't know you that well but have you considered letting everything out to your GP and seeing if you could benefit from some support from a mental health team... I don't mean being sectioned and carted off so your children and dogs are left alone .... I know some members on here do have access to a mental health worker and they see them at their homes or at a clinic ... There's nothing to be ashamed of admitting that mentally you have hit rock bottom it's only the same as being at rock bottom physically which is where many of us have felt lots of times ..

It's just a suggestion and perhaps other people may have some different advice

VG x

[LindseyMid]

You need to see your GP if you are struggling with depression and anxiety. CBT may be more appropriate for you right now than counselling and medications could also help.

If you have a virus though, it's not surprising if you feel down as that is quite a common reaction to some viruses even in people who are otherwise well.

[FibroFoggyKaty1]

Feeling like you do right now is terrible and you think there is no way out, but there is. I was on the brink of suicide a while back, but my little grandaughter came to see me and I knew I couldnt do this to them (I have 7 grandchildren & 4 children) how could they be deal with that !! so I started talking to my kids instead and slowly I felt much better. It was a long hard road and not easy going down there, but once I did I was so relieved I had changed my mind. I have now been seeing a clinical phsycologist for a few months which had helped a bit, but I think its only you yourself who can get over this by being strong and not giving in to your terrible feelings.We all know that we will have Fibro for the rest of our lives and that in itself is hard to live with. When we get other things on top of all our long standing troubles like a virus, it all becomes too much. I am sure if you talk with your family they will be able to understand what youre going through. Its no good keeping it all to yourself as they cant help if you wont ask. I am certain they want to help you so dont shut them out, its not your fault that you have Fibro or a virus is it? so give them the chance to help you and talk to them...hoping you feel much better very soon. Caring huggles from Katy xx

[ladymoth]

I agree with all the above, Teddysmum! You have been making progress recently, but you are bound to have setbacks now and again.

It would be wise to get help from your GP, so that you can be supported by your local CPN or someone. else from the health team - it's no big deal, so many of us have been there and lived to tell the tale.

I do hope you find the help you need, and that you feel better soon.

Love from Moffy x

[Shazzzy]

Have been feeling exactly the same lately , two weeks ago absolutely suicidal, could find no reason to stay on this planet, finally started to talk to friends about how low I feel, they advised cpn, have appointment for tomorow, still on shaky ground but have better days( I also had virus on top of fibro )feeling bit more hopeful. Will see.

[Hidden]

These viruses are really laying people low, I have had one after another the latest being norovirus. My sister has very bad panic attacks, but it helps her to talk to someone whilst she is experiencing one. So it's good you spoke to The Samaritans. Maybe your doctor can give you details of courses that deal with stress etc. My sister went on one and they did relaxation techniques, listening to calming music etc. Plus you have support of people who are going through similar things.Counselling can be very effective, it gives you the chance to talk through all what is happening in your life. I had it once and wasn't sure it was going to help me. I am glad I stuck with it, it helped me get control of my life and my problems. I hope you can get the advise and support you need. x

[Teddysmum43]

Again thankyou,The panic died off about an hour ago and I feel so different now,well not brilliant but I've got through those awful feelings. I wouldn't wish panic attacks on anyone,they are the pits. However they do seem necessary for me to pull me out of a a large hole. I wish it wasn't that way but it is.

Wednesday I've been on a stress course,that was a few years ago now,maybe it's time for a refresher. Shazzy I'm so glad your getting the help you need. These viruses are not good for fibro people. The last one I had was three years ago and I was in the same state then.

I'm also such a wuss my 13 year old son has gone on a raf cadet activity holiday this week. I know he will be having the time of his life but I'm bloomin missing him even though my daughter is here. Ok Ali give yourself permission to stop worrying woman!!

I'm off to look for the funny post of the day!

[Hidden]

I used to have some hum dinger panic attacks. This illness is about imbalances of the chemicals between the gut and brain. Its about chain reactions. Its so easy for the mind to start looking for those tigers in the long grass. We get soooo wired by the fantasies that our heads create trying to justify why are are in such a panic....

I found plugging a different reality into my ears helped. I used faith tapes a soothing voice so that my voice in my head wasn't alone.

I wrote a diary....forcing myself to only note positive events in my day.

What I DID achieve. I walked to the loo. I brushed my teeth. I got through a shop check out.

I worked against the chemicals to find perspective.

Its not easy, but it is possible to work through this KNOWING that it is an effect of imbalance and WILL pass.

I now live very much in this day only. Yesterday is gone. I can only learn from it. Its done, I can't change it. Tomorrow hasn't happened yet. I have no idea what will happen there. I can't control it. I only have today. One day at a time. If a day is too long, I have this hour. I may as well enjoy it. I count my smiles knowing that each one is precious. One hour rolls into the next and no tiger has eaten me yet.

What I can control is my own toxins. The foods chemicals and emotions I have around my body. I can stop the imbalance from getting worse and begin to feel more in control of the imbalances. Adrenal fatigue, gut speed, good bacteria levels, Neuro toxins.....are all things I can research and minimise

With more fellings of control those tigers become pussy cats xxx

I really hope you have a good day today.....just for today xxxx

And tomorrow will just be another today x

Hope you're feeling better x