Hi everyone me again. Well I took Bambi to the dog trust for her assessment and she has passed so they will offer her a rehoming space. It could take a month thou but I don't mind as it means I can have some more time with her. It really was rather nice there and the staff were great,I was in tears of course but the girl was understanding and thinks they can get someone suited for Bambis needs. So yes I've been brave and done it,I was so damn nervous driving over there. Thought they would think badly of me for letting her go. The kennels are lovely very modern and bright,they all have their own sofas too! I do feel relieved but I still feel gutted. At least I've got some time with her,not sure if that's a good thing or bad thing really. Probably will change my mind a hundred times by then.
I am just so sick of feeling so low. I don't want to carry on feeling like this,it's not much of a life. The anxiety is so chronic and I don't get many days off from it. Constant pain and tiredness as you guys all know. Having to give up stuff that I love. I just feel so hopeless. Thank god for my kids and my dogs otherwise I don't think I would be here. I can't even speak to or see my friends as we have all been bringing each other down. Am I never going to cheer up? I really have to give myself a good talking to to get through this. Kids have gone for the weekend so I've got more time to be horrid to myself thing is I really don't want to be like this I do actually care for myself very much and hate seeing myself like this. My doctor who I thought was pretty ok has really changed her attitude to people with fibro like we are all wasting her time. I feel I could have something really nasty and it wouldn't be investigated"oh it's just fibro!" It's not just me she is like it with,it's my other friends with fibro too. Trouble is she is the only one in the practice that is slightly interested in fibro,I expect the other doctors have worn her down.
On a brighter note and I'm probably rambling now I have developed an obsession with antiques programmes,is anyone else interested in them? I wish I had the guts and the knowledge to buy and sell antiques but I wouldn't know where to start. Car boot sales seem to be the place to go but I don't have the energy to do that. Ebay is saturated with people buying and selling antiques. I really want to give myself an interest,apart fom the woofers and online games. It's just finding the energy isn't it?