I never thought of myself as someone who suffers more than others with anxiety but in the last 6 months or so it appears I am very much in the wrong in this front. From recent counselling sessions it is a common source to my problems that keeps rearing it's ugly head.
I had a particularly bad day yesterday where I completely lost it. Didn't want to go anywhere not even get out of bed to go downstairs. Just wanted to hide from the world and have some peace just for a bit. Take a break from it all I guess. I am sure most people do this normally but because I get so worked up I almost crash from sheer exhaustion. It makes me feel very ill.
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Jimbob1984
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Hi Jimbob, sorry to hear you've had such a bad day
Sometimes i think it is best to give yourself a rest, to have that day in bed. I think we forget the mental and physical toll that anxiety takes on your body. I found sometimes that the more I pushed myself to get up and do something, the more worked up I got and the worse I felt.
It surprises me just how much it does take out of you. I feel drained! I always feel a lot better after a bit of a switch off day though. I almost go through a renewal process or into like a cocoon state. I will probably be up and about in an hour or so and clean myself and everything around me from top to toe. Just a way of starting again I guess.
I just get worked up when I fear the unknown. I was supposed to be going for another driving lesson. I've had a couple already but was terrified of not being in control and afraid I would break, hurt something or just make a mistake and feel ridiculous for it. I don't know about you but I am a master at beating myself up over things.
Anyway I cancelled it coz I was just so overwhelmed. Of course I then beat myself up anyway for letting my anxiety get the better of me lol
I often do that too. I find that giving my body and mind a break when I feel it needs it sometimes give you that really relaxed state that you don't often feel.
I can really relate to your fear of the unknown and not being in control. I too am learning to drive. A few weeks ago I was on a small road that came off from a restaurant so there was very little traffic, I pulled up to a roundabout from the road and a car came behind me. I stalled the car in panic, burst into tears and couldn't move. So embarassing. However now I am driving on the roads normally without much guidance. I decided I just had to bite the bullet because I know I am capable of driving, I was just letting my worry and stress get in the way.
You maybe did the right thing in cancelling. Wait until you are calmer. I found that after my episode I got so annoyed at myself that I actually pushed myself into wanting to go out to prove to myself I could do it. Sometimes I think a failure makes you stronger? Try and find your confidence and go for it I squeal every time I come up to a roundabout but I am so pleased to be learning.
Jimbob i can fully understand how you are feeling and sometimes you never think you are going to see the light at the end of the tunnel. Its like a vicious circle one day we have a good day the next we are right back where we started. But please try and stay positive everyone on this site knows the road your walking. We are all here to support each other which is fantastic.
Sorry to hear you had a bad day yesterday lets hope today is brighter. I may be talking out of turn but you have to force yourself convince yourself your going to fight this demon that lurks.
It is not easy to put into practice but the more you hide away with no motivation the worse it becomes. Your exhausted because all your energy is taken up trying to come to terms with anxiety. Try to do some breathing exercises this helps considerably and always talk to family and friends how you feel. Believe it or not off loading can make you feel a little better.
I do feel your pain and i have walked this road but things will get better just stay positive.
I will walk the road as best I can. It is just hard sometimes to remember that it can better sometimes. I have a counselling session tonight though so will see if that helps. I always find it hard though as there almost seems to be so much to get off my chest. I struggle to manage how much comes out and how much stays in.
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I squeal every time I come up to a roundabout but I am so pleased to be learning. 
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