My anxiety & fear is increasing. Its been bad for 9 yrs now. I am a senior citizen. I am on medication as well as 2 naturopathic remedies. I wake every morning in "fear" feeling I'm short of breath & scared. I see a therapist and psyciatrist. I'm at the end of my rope. I have read that anxiety can make you feel breathless. I've gone to a CBT class and tried many other things. I just want to enjoy life. Are any of you in such a bad situation & can you offer any advice? Thank you.
Does anyone get so scared they feel they m... - Anxiety Support
Does anyone get so scared they feel they may die?
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kama24
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Hi Kama24. First I want to say it's brave of you to reach out and express how you are feeling. I hope that soon you will find relief with anxiety. What helps me sometimes is taking a warm shower or bath, splashing water on my face, looking myself in the mirror and telling myself I'm going to be okay. I ask myself am I in pain. I take my pulse or I'll take a walk. As a last resort I'll take my Rx for Xanax and watch something funny or with animals. It does get better. We just gotta find our happy place and know that things will be okay. Try to enjoy the each moment. Say out loud what you are grateful for. I prayed for you.
Thank you for your kindness and prayers. I too pray nightly. Yes sometimes a hot bath does relax me. I would like to walk but am afraid to go alone because "what if"....my mind thinks morbid thoughts. The odd thing is that I didn't used to be this bad until about a month ago, now I'm a mess. I try mindfullness and listing things I'm thankful for .....I try everything. There was a very simple breathing exercise I came across yesterday youtube.com/watch?v=S-qJpPh... and I'm trying it also "tapping". The fear is just so intense and won't leave me. I took an ativan an hr ago but here I sit....thank you again for understanding.
My suggestion is for you to get the DARE Anxiety book and watch their youtube videos to learn how to really deal with anxious thinking and anxiety, you can't outthink anxiety it just makes it worse.
And my other suggestion may make you cringe but I suggest you start facing your fear of dying, we are all going to die some day. i started doing it by reading obituaries, articles on dying when I felt triggered, imagining my own death, etc... Spend some time questioning why you are afraid of dying. You can even read stories of near-death experiences for comfort. Sometimes fear of dying is really fear of living - good thing to investigate for yourself.
Thank you for the suggestions. I know why I feel a fear of death, I've had it since a child seeing realatives laid out in their living room, being with someone as the pass, just having lost 2 brother in laws and a sister in law. I fear "how" I'm going to die. However you are right in that all of us will go through it one day. I have not heard of DARE but will google it! Thank you!
kama24 - anxiety disorder makes our whole nervous system over sensitive. As a result it tends to exaggerate small problems and can mimic the symptoms of all kinds of health issues. Like breathlessness which is a very common symptom of high anxiety.
First do get your doctor to check you out but if he or she can't account for the breathlessness you can be certain it's a symptom of a super sensitive nervous system.
It's the same with your feeling you're going to die. Nobody wants to die before their time but jangled nerves can blow this up into a feeling your death is imminent. I'm sure that's why you have this recurrant belief that you're going to die.
The more you can find out about your illness the better equipped you are to find respite and recovery.
The way forward is to accept these feelings and ideas for the present knowing full well that they are just figments of anxious imagination. Learn to co-exist with them for a while without adding second fear to that flash of fist fear. It's fear that keeps our nervous system over sensitised as it causes too much cortisol and adrenalin to flood our bodies (anxiety hormones).
Don't worry about feeling particularly worried when you wake each morning: cortisol levels tend to be highest when we awake. And there's the sudden realisation that we have to face another day of high anxiety that all adds to early morning anxiety. You're not the only one who finds waking a bad time for anxiety, believe me.
Thank you so much for the advise. Actually I went last wk for blood work and cortisol check. I don't go back to Dr. until Nov 17 though. I do believe anxiety causes heightened FEAR and yes the early morning starts us off. I know I'm not alone in this, but I seriously need to try to find a way to control it. I am taking Gaba from a naturopath and really hope I see some improvement. Thank you again for replying to me.
Kama24, I feel the mornings are when I also feel more vulnerable, and I'm same as you have a lifetime fear of illness and death. Unlike you I have no bad memories from childhood other than trying to imagine what death would be like. Which in itself is frightening. Please read and take notice of Jeff's wise words, he has "propped" me up above once. Good wishes and feelings kama. x. PS. Claire Weekes' book I can recommend.
Dear Jeff1943, As you're helping kama24, you are also helping me. I too am a senior and for the past few days having an unexplained recurrence of my anxiety symptoms. Because I find them so unpleasant I'm beginning to feel depressed also. It is knocking the joy from my day to day living. Your wise words are like a soothing balm and I'm sure kama24 is finding it so too. I see my GP tomorrow, but not really expecting miracles. Probably get more help from my Claire Weekes book. Reading what you advise is soothing and I thank you. x
Asenath - thankyou, I have also noticed how it's easy to get depressed about having high anxiety. But it's secondary depression, when the anxiety yields and brings respite and recovery the depression ceases.
As Claire Weekes ("the woman who cracked the anxiety code") says, we know these copycat symptoms are not life threatening so through Acceptance and Floating we can acquire a state of mind where frankly we stop caring whether we have the symptoms of anxiety or not. Of course, they're uncomfortable but they are paper tigers and can do no real harm. When we no longer care we stop frightening ourselves half to death every few minutes, we stop pumping out the hormones of fear - allowing our sensitised nervous system to gradually return to normality.
Naturally, it's sometimes possible for anxiety disorder to return after recovery but so what? We have healed ourselves of it once so this time it will be much easier.
I wish you God's speed on your journey to recovery.
Thank you Jeff1943, You seem to hit the spot every time, as I am quite fearful of my symptoms and find it challenging to say the least. Your words of advice are a great comfort as I need to be reminded that anxiety isn't life-threatening. You are much appreciated, thank you. Wishing you good health yourself. x
There is a book written many years ago which remains constantly in print because it has helped so many to find recovery and regain their quiet minds.
We're talking millions worldwide.
If you only read one more book this is that book available pre-owned or new on Amazon and Ebay for a few dollars: "Hope and help for your nerves" by Doctor Claire Weekes.
Thank you, I have read it twice. Sadly I am still the same
Kama24 - reading it twice or 200 times does not bring recovery.
That is only achieved by putting into practice Weekes' teachings without any immediate expectation of benefit.
You took years to get into your present condition, do not expect that by practicing Acceptance you will start feeling better by tea time.
'Face. Accept. Float. Let time pass.'
You are so right Jeff. It's unfortunate that we all want immediate gratification
when it took years to get to where we are today. 
xx
im going to give the book a try. I just want to heal and be ok again. Mornings are horrible. Having over sensitive nerves creates havoc on my system. I know this has been a result of bad thinking over the years.
Hi Blue, Just remember that the magic doesn't come from reading the book.
It takes action in what you have read in order to go forward. Don't give up
We are here to help you go forward. xx
All the time.
Then you know how I feel and what I go through daily. Lets hope one day we can be "normal"!
Of Course.
Hi Kama24,
I too have struggled with anxiety about dying over the last week or so after getting through covid-19, so much that it has disrupted my sleep schedule to an unhealthy extent. I am also still in the middle of this struggle, where I’ve been prescribed Lexapro to try and get through this really terrible transitional period, so please do not feel alone or like your story is not heard and acknowledged.
Thank you for the reassurance. It is so difficult to understand why no medications or other suggested "cures" don't help me. I think I tried them all. FEAR is such a smothering feeling. We have to hang in there!
I can totally relate to this I struggle with the same thing it’s hell.
I try so hard to think positive . I find it very odd that if I happen to get up in the middle of the night, I am fine, I go back to bed.......no fear. I wake at 8am and the fear is immediate. We have to keep fighting it. Take care
I could never understand that when I had it. I was just the same for years. it does pass the dreadful morning feeling. Keep going as best you can. Thinking of you.
Hello kama, you an I experience the exact same symptoms. But may I add mine may be a little bit more worsening. All my symptoms came out of nowhere. As of now my body feels weird. At times I have good days, but most of the time they're bad. I wish an wish I can be normal again but this is going on my 7th year. Suicide been on my mind numerous of time's but the word hope keeps me here. We both will get better some
I truly understand how you fee. I often wish I had the nerve to end it but death is my big fear. It is getting sickening waking every morning feeling scared, or short of breath and think "what if" It is 9 yrs for me. I am trying a naturopath now. Time will tell, I've only been on the drops and GABA for about 2 1/2 wks. Once in a while I have a ok day. I believe our minds over think and mostly frightening thoughts. Hang in there.
I have TERRIBLE C-PTSD & depression & have been in chronic pain for 24 years and am also a senior woman (58 this year). I understand how you feeling with your anxiety.
Do you have to go out to work daily? I do know that when I know I have to leave the house that my anxiety goes through the roof & I can barely get ready to go anywhere. I feel sick, my hands shake, & I feel as if my head is about to pop off my body!
I am a Christian, so can tell you 1 thing that helps me. Instead of listening to news (or watching it), as it just makes me feel worse, I put on Christian hymns. That seems to help. But I ALSO use a variety of "tricks" as it always depends on my anxiety at the time, how bad it is, what set it off, etc., & what will work at that time. So, also, if you have a favorite type of rock & roll, jazz, etc., from when you were young, as I do, put that on, & get "in the groove." But nothing that'll make you sad or bring back bad memories. Dance, sing....do anything to take your mind off your anxiety. I also use (A LOT & DAILY!!!) of Amazon Audible books when my anxiety is bad, as it is every single day, I listen to 1 of my FICTION love stories, which I'd be embarrassed if anyone knew about as they're really what I liked when I was young & I find myself blushing at them now that I'm old(er) ...(I used to listen to end of life as we know it books by my favorite authors, like Bobby Akart, A. American, etc.) but then Covid hit & I HAD to change the book genre as "end of life as we know it" had actually happened, & those books just made me more fearful & gave me "doomsday/no hope" thinking (NOT good with my severe depression!), & altho' I'm really too old for silly Regency-type love story books around the early 1800's, they do at least take my mind off of the current awful events in our world & onto something else. Some authors can actually add mystery into the love stories & also comedy, so when I find an author I like I stick close & go through a Series of several books about 1 family over time & various loves.
I learned this tactic of switching my thought processes by taking care of 2 elderly parents who both have different dementias for the past 6 years by myself (me, 100% disabled, no children to help & my only sibling committed suicide, so it's been the worst 6 yrs of my life, & my life has NOT been a nice 1 since my childhood - thus my C-PTSD etc.) ....which is when they are upset about something, CHANGE THE SUBJECT! I figured if it works for dementia, it may work for me.
I also will watch old tv series I used to enjoy (as new tv shows seem so dark these days or have too much violence, etc.) or old movies, which also takes my mind off my anxiety (depression, pain, etc), at least for awhile. And thank the Lord, I do have a good dr. who has given me Xanax which I never use what the dosage is except on days when I must leave the house, & then I always have to use my full dosage. I save the rest for a possible future time of crisis (which these days could happen at any given moment sadly), in case we are not able to get our meds. If you can find a doctor who is willing to give you something for your absolutely unbearable times, like Xanax, that would help. I know it is a very difficult medication to come off (especially for someone like me who's been on it for approx. 9 years), but sometimes the anxiety we suffer is worse for our health than the actual medication is (as long as we do not abuse it, which I do not).
I hope some of these suggestions help you. Know we who have PTSD & anxiety completely understand what you are feeling & we KNOW how horrific it is! Some days I think I just cannot go another day, but I then remind myself to just get through THIS 1 HOUR, OR 2 HOURS, OR 1 DAY....the 1 day at a time we've all heard. We never know what tomorrow will bring, bad or good. All we truly have is today - so please keep telling yourself all you have to do is get through TODAY, or this ONE HOUR...and that you'll get through the next hour, or day when you get there.
All you can do is the best you can do & plz try not to beat yourself up for having this anxiety. I SO wish I were "normal." I wish I could go out & have fun & do all the stuff normal people do...but I just can't. My home is my "safe place" as long as my husband is here. Thankfully he's retired & is home. Sadly he's older than me & I fear the day when I might lose him & actually be alone. Not good! That's when I have to go back to - one day at a time!
God bless you & keep you in His loving arms. He knows things in this world are a mess & He will make things right someday. I wish it were today!! Try to be careful about how much news you watch. You cannot trust mainstream media anyway & they DO want you to fear. Sadly. Try the Audible books or book on cd (I know if we have a library card here in America there's an app called "Libby" that will allow us to use our Library card to get audible books to listen to for free - & I take advantage of that too), music, or even comedy on YouTube. If something can make you sing or laugh, that will help also.
Plz know, I can give great advice, but I'm terrible at taking my own advice. So, I DO understand how you feel. I do not have MY act together & often am quite a MESS!! PTL my husband after 20 years understands when I disappear into my bathroom for 2-4 hours, to just leave me alone. It is my once safe place & I could live in it!
Anxiety's an Invisible Disability that many people don't understand. Please check out the IDA.org for inexpensive pamphlets you can buy to give to family, friends, workmates, doctors, etc., to help them understand that what they see when you ARE able to get outside and put that smile on your face & act happy, doesn't mean that is the real story & the real you! I HIGHLY recommend those little pamphlets to anyone & everyone who has any type of invisible disability as, unlike being in a wheelchair, people do not "get" the invisible" H*ll you live with. The 1 called "Looks Can Be Deceiving" is my favorite. I carry several with me as I always run into disabled people who say their family & friends just don't understand why it's so hard for "us" to get out, & why we cancel so much, & why we leave functions early, etc., etc. That 1 little pamphlet when they read it will put them in YOUR shoes, & usually you'll be treated with much more compassion after. I do find tho' after a few years, often I have to give them again, as people have short memories (smile).
Again, my prayers go out to you. Hang in there...1 day at a time, 1 minute at a time, 1 hour at a time....& get your mind on something else as soon as you start to feel anxiety hit you. I'm sure you know about deep breathing, hold your breath to the count of 4, release, etc. Easier said than done in the middle of a panic attack, but it will lower your heart rate. Sent with compassion! Your friend in anxiety (& all that comes with it).....Kim
Dear Kim, thank you so much for the encouraging words. I will be 74 this month. I started having panic attacks at age 12. Back then they really didn't do anything to treat them I remember our dr. telling my mom I was doing it for "attention". I did have some freedom for a # of years when on Paxil, they 11 yrs ago I went off it and withdrawal was horrible Then the drug merry go round started, to no avail. I now live with fear 24/7 We will be married 53 yrs this month. My husband does all he can to support me but doesn't understand why I am in constant fear of death, and as soon as I wake in the morning FEAR hits. I too often shake, sometimes the tears come too. I seldom leave the house alone anymore nor drive alone. I have too many what ifs. My mother had her neck broken in a car accident when I was 4 yrs old. She lived a life of paiin, a spinal operation was a total failure. You are a good person to care for your parents. I miss mine so very much. It's been over 20 yrs now. I used to read but for some reason don't any more. I see a therapist and psciatrist. I take Buspar, and luvox. Ea moring I take an ativan (Xanax )....I've taken 2mg for many yrs. It gives me a small, very small amt of relief. My husband is leaving Sun. for a week back north. I am in a blind panic. My girlfriend from Toronto used to come stay with me but she can't make it this yr. Our daughter lives there too, unfortunately this year she has to go to Vancouver on business. I have no siblings nor real friends in town, so I'm in this alone with my faithful dog. When alone here I like to keep the radio on.. I have 2 girlfriends who are going to phone me every day but that doesn't help as much as having someone here in person. So many people simply just don't understand, they haven't 'walked in my shoes". My husband says I have to take it one day at a time. He is right. I have been involved with a local animal rescue for about 12 yrs now. I run auctions and a yd sale for them on line. My house is a constant mess but I don't care I do it for the animals. I admire your courage. I try breathing exercises and tapping, little id any help. Meditation does nothing and I admit I am not good at doing things faithfully. I am going to try to take Dusty (our adopted 10 yr old dog for a short walk) I try not to "what if" but its still there. I faced a lot of death growing up and now live in fear of it. I pray every night for myself and others. I will add your name too. Hang in there, thank you again for being so kind. Gail
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