Bad thoughts

I can't stop feeling guilty for paying food and for feel guilty for eating it's been months like this I feel like i should stop eating but I dont want to go back to that road again. I was 17 years old when i was starting to have a eating disorder and lost a lot of weight I dont want to go there again but the way I been feeling I dont know if iam going to be strong enough to fight this off I feel so low sad feel so down its unreal

[Hidden]

Hello

Well done at such a young age beating this dreadful eating disorder

It must be so difficult but you have done it

I think what is happening is anything that controls us tries to find a way back in and I know how well you have done you have the strength to keep it from trying to gain control

If you have a support number that you can phone use it let people know how you are feeling so they can give you the support you need and deserve as well as using the Community knowing someone is hear to listen x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thank u

[Hidden]

I used to have a eating disorder as a teen but now iam good well I was until I been feeling guilty for eating food and having thoughts that I should just stop eating its overwhelming me iam trying so hard to fight it but it's so overwhelming

[Damian]

I find that anxiety can surface in unexpected ways. If something is coming up that's bothering me, I'll get anxious about everything else. Often my OCD will get worse, so I'll feel more compelled to do the rituals and more worried about not doing them "properly".

I wondered if something similar might be making you feel anxious about eating. You've posted about your home situation, and that sounds like something you (and, in fact, anyone) would feel anxious about. Perhaps that anxiety is finding an outlet as thoughts around eating?

Hope you manage to beat it, good luck.

[Alershot1]

Please don’t say fight it’s not a fight accept you have a condition. Float not fight. When I had children that would not eat the Doctor said just leave small amounts of food around the home. Imagine you are still a child and your Mummy said you have got to eat that. You are doing this to yourself Try and be kind to yourself try complan or drinks if that’s easier. Try not to make an issue of it. It will pass love

[lillyofthevalley37]

Don't give in to these thoughts they are harmful and you could get really ill

[lillyofthevalley37]

How did you recover from your eating disorder when you had it before ? You have children now don't listen to Ana it wants to ruin your life

[Hidden in reply to lillyofthevalley37]

My bfs sister had a eating disorder she ended up in hospital that was a wake up call for me to start eating more

[lillyofthevalley37 in reply to Hidden]

So eat even if you aren't hungry or else demon Ana will drag you down ?

You have children now do you really want their childhood poisened by the presence of demon Ana ? Don't listen to it

[Damian]

Hello again, just wondered how you'd got on over the last week. How have you been feeling about eating? Did you manage to eat the amounts you normally do? Hope it's all going well for you!

[Hidden in reply to Damian]

Yes I been trying really hard to ignore my thoughts and the feeling to stop eating so far it's working it's not gone I still think about it but iam trying to ignore it the best I can

[Damian in reply to Hidden]

Do you find that unwanted thoughts tend to get less if you ignore them? I think it's often like that with OCD. If you can stop doing the rituals for a while, you stop feeling such a strong need to do them, and the anxiety that goes along with them gets less.

I was wondering what that's like with pure O. There aren't any physical rituals to stop, so it must be harder to break out of. It's not easy but you can, to a certain extent, push yourself to stop doing something physical. You can't really stop yourself thinking about something though.