This is a nightmare! I have tried HRT again as I am in surgically induced menopause and my hot flushes are frequent and intense with feelings of panic and a racing heart. These are IN ADDITION to my panic atracks and long standing GAD.
Well - I just couldn't do it! The HRT patch I was on just made me feel hideous after about 12 hours. Shaking, palpitations, onset of migraine and feeling like i'd been 'taken over' by something. I tried valium, and it did nothing to alleviate these feelings so I know it was the HRT.
I'm now curled up in a fearful ball on the sofa again, which I'm sorry to say has pretty much been my daily refuge since about March now. I feel utterly pathetic and don't feel I can go on like this.😢 Every day I suffer these severe menopause symptoms, as well as panic attacks that make me vomit. I spoke to my local CMHT about a week ago telling them how bad things have become and that I am now having frequent suicidal ideation, but basically they just told me to go and do relaxation techniques and phone an ambulance if I didn't feel safe. They are about as much use as a chocolate fireguard (as I've said before on this forum).
Thanks for letting me vent.....❤
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Meredyn
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I followed your saga on the other support (?) website and I know how hard is to find a suitable HRT for ladies who had surgical menopause. Many over there are struggling with anxiety/depression. I have researched a bit about HRT because my 2 attempts were in vain, first time it made no difference to symptoms and second time it brought back migraines, and have bumped into some very interesting articles about 'fear extinction' and sex hormones. Have a look when you feel up to it.
I miss talking to you, not many real friends around... my main problem now is depression. I have recently been diagnosed with Persistent Depressive Disorder, also called Dysthymia. Going to have a psychiatrist appointment and see how it goes.
Hope you can find something, whatever it is, to help you feel better.
I am so, so glad you found me here! And i'm so sorry that you're struggling with depression, too. Let's stay in touch, via messaging here? I can't cope with my email any longer - that's how crippling the anxiety has become unfortunately! I have a good book recommendation by a very smart author that I know you will love that I will send to you.
Much, much love back to you!❤❤❤
(Yes - and I see the 'support group' is being just as 'supportive' as ever. Sheesh).....😲
Dear heart - I wanted to send this via messaging, but it won't let me. This is for you - you'll totally GET this. Beautiful, powerful writing: granta.com/pause/
It's me again - under a new account as managed to lock myself out (I'm notorious at doing this)!😳 I just had to ask - are you BeaR over at the 'other place' - it seems very much like you. 😊 If so, I see the drama llama is still dishing it.....Sending much love!💜💜💜
Hi I was on HRT for years and it never brought on a panic attack or anything like this. Mind you I don't really suffer much from anxiety, just depression, so maybe it's more your anxiety and not the HRT? x
I am so sorry about what you are going through, it sounds really terrible.
Panic attacks sound horrific, I never had them with my GAD luckily but came near to it a few times and that was bad enough. I had attacks where I just felt really sick and spaced out and needed to get out of the situation. So sorry that you now also have such a bad reaction to HRT. Attacks that you actually vomit due to panic sound terrible.
I think I remember that you had a bad reaction to antidepressants which was life threatening.
Are there any sort of antidepressants you can take or are you unable to take them at all?
When you are so ill you really need some help through medication, particularly if you have suicidal thoughts. I understand why as you are going through so much.
Do hang on in there, and seek urgent help if you start to feel suicidal.
Dear Kim! Your replies are always so thoughtful - thank you! I need to treat this crippling anxiety, first and foremost. My GP wrote to my psychiatrist stating that he was concerned as he didn't think I was getting the treatment I needed - and so I have an appointment with him on Wednesday. The tone of his letter was a bit grim - I don't think the psychiatrist liked being 'called out' by my GP. So this adds to things somewhat at the moment. Dreading Wednesday, if I'm honest.....😢❤❤
Oh dear as if you don't have enough to worry about. It is not your fault so try not to worry if you can. You really do need to get some effective treatment so your GP probably needed to do that.
I had the same thing. Surgical menopause. Tried HRT and had the same reaction.
I refused to take them and all other forms of HRT.
Which turned out to be a good thing because 4 years later was diagnosed with breast cancer which happened to feed off of estrogen!!
Anyway, i went a full year of misery. Insomnia, depression, anxiety, rage, etc. The final straw was when i was fired from my job for basically being a huge bitch. Lol. I can laugh about it now. Because they were not wrong.
After that debacle, i got on meds for my mental health symptoms and finally got my act together.
I'm still on meds because, as it turns out, i needed them.
I wish i could go back and get some help before things got so bad.
My dr was not helpful either so i stopped going.
She's a fantastic, well regarded surgeon. But i just think doctors don't have any good options to give. Mental health monitoring should be part of hysterectomy after care.
Oh gosh, Dogdoo! Thank you SO MUCH for replying!!! At last - someone who has experienced exactly the same as me! If you don't mind me asking, which medication helped you in the end? And do these hideous flushes EVER go? Mine start with enormous feelings of panic - I hate them! Still pretty much just as bad, and it's now over 4 years since my surgery. I don't believe you were ever a bitch - please don't say that about yourself. You were just a lady who was struggling in the aftermath of this horrible surgery and no-one told you how truly awfully it messes with your head. My heart goes out to you too.❤❤
Oh - and goodness! How are you recovering from your cancer? You are so very brave! Just goes to show that it doesnt take much estrogen at all to set it off. I am sick of how the media are currently ramming HRT down people's throats via celebrity endorsement as a 'wonder cure' and fountain of youth. For some of us, it makes us ill at best and for others it can be deadly!❤❤
It's a wonderful piece, isn't it? Another brilliant book that's just been published is 'Flash Count Diary' by Darcey Steinke. It's much in the same vein, and you can read a great excerpt on the publisher's website.😉 I found both extremely validating and surprisingly comforting today....❤
Wow! I'll check these out, too. I think we WILL. But it does take an awful lot of tenacity. Love the idea of smashing the patriarchal dictat of the 'dried up old hag'. Outrageous!!! How DARE they?!? And to think - the 'forum elsewhere' fosters and cleaves to this idea. Grandma Clampett, there is a whole other enlightened sisterhood emerging - so watch out....😉👍❤
You betcha!!! Did you read my mind?! I've been listening to everything from Motley Crue and early Sabbath and Rainbow, right through to Jethro Tull today. Rock on, sister!!😃❤👍👍
I take clonidine for the hot flashes and night sweats and it works like a dream.
I ended up on zoloft/trazadone combo that helped my mood a great deal.
That and time i guess. After that first year it tapered off but was also on the meds so who knows.
I'm off zoloft and on lamictal as zoloft atopped working.
Honestly, the cancer wasn't too bad. Caught fairly early so lumpectomy, radiation and oral meds for 10 years. Slight spread to lymph nodes. I was 46 at diagnoses and pushing 50 now. So far, so good!
I've heard black kohosh root is good for menopause so perhaps look in to that? Was too late for me by the time someone told me about it! Lolol
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I'm getting really tired of not being my old self. 
