My anxiety is destroying my whole life rig... - Anxiety Support

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My anxiety is destroying my whole life right now

Nevic84 profile image
48 Replies

Health Anxiety, mainly dying of cancer since my dad did quite suddenly

It’s literally ruining my life right now and I’m struggling

Starting on antidepressants tomorrow

Every aspect of my life is controlled by the fear of dying

Someone please please help me

I’m so lost

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Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84
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48 Replies

Could you please clarify if you have cancer or the fear of having cancer.

Thank you

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

Fear of getting it, sorry

in reply to Nevic84

I was there as well. The only thing that helped me was to go get checked out. If you feel it’s extreme then get checked every 6 months. My experience with friends and family members who have had cancer is to catch it early. Hope this helps.

Bryan

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

Is that just feeding it though,

Although I am getting bloods done on Monday!

How do you overcome it

in reply to Nevic84

I’m not sure how.. I just try to live for today and thankful for each day. I also feel that if we live in fear that it’s robbing us. I heard a quote that stuck with me- “fear is a tool the devil uses to rob us of our happiness.”

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

This is too true

in reply to Nevic84

One more I remember from watching Tony Robbins videos is he asks “why don’t we start living as if we did only have a few days left”

Different, but helps.

Want2BHappy3 profile image
Want2BHappy3

Sorry that your struggling, that's great that you're starting Medication tomorrow, unfortunately those Medications take a couple of weeks to kick in. Tell the doctor how desperate you feel, that if he can give you something that will help Now?. I was in your position and my doctor gave me medication that help ASAP

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

I’ve had diazepam, it’s okay but I’m very limited at what I can take nowadays xx

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4

I'm the same as you my dad died suddenly also . I feel for you as know how hard it is . I've just started on setraline also as couldn't go on like it x

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna

I know exactly how u feel my dad died from cancer and a year and a half after my younger sister who was only 29 died of cancer as well . I live each day the same as you buy I am happy you're getting help, I let my problem overcome me and now because of the severe anxiety the adrenaline rush that comes with it I get constant heart palpitations which does not go away on its own and I am on meds for...This makes me feel worse , anxiety worse..i just feel hopeless at times..The important thing is that you're getting help , live life one day at a time. I know easier said than done .

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

Hi I'm just the same as you when I go into panic I get hard thumps in my chest is that the palpitations you get?

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to Lauriem4

Yes that is palpitations because of the adrenaline rush caused by anxiety , problem is mine out of whack and keeps on palpatating even when i am not anxious.

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

Yeah I have them even if not anxious sometimes just horrible

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to Lauriem4

Omg serious do you feel ill with them like breathless , dizzy cause I do . Are you on meds, I am on beta blockers but I think the dosage or the meds need changing.

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

Yes I'm always thinking about it aswell which makes worse . Yeah on propranolol sometimes helps I'm not sure not always though. How old are you x

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to Lauriem4

Hi i am 30...how old are you and how long you're on propanol..do you take everyday.

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

I'm 33 and a while and only take half if anxious really how about you . Do you get panic attacks?

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to Lauriem4

No I don't get panic attacks but when am ill or hv to go to the doctors palpitations start and I can't sleep etc..idk if my anxiety brings on physical problems which makes it worse 4 me..i get more anxious ..but these palpitations is the worse feeling.

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

Yes I'm exactly the same get very anxious and it's just a circle . Yes it is the worst .Are you on anything for your anxiety or just beta blocker?

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to Lauriem4

Hi just beta blocker , concor .. the cardiologist told me he doesn't want me on anxiety meds because u become dependant on it , he told me try mediation and buy a self help book..smh..i hv not done either. although once my gp gave me lexotan for a week which worked fine.

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

Yep that's what I thought . Would you say you have alot of them in a day ? Some days before my period are worse for me x

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to Lauriem4

I hv only been taking the beta blocker 1.25mg since March 19th , I was feeling fine meaning no palpitations only fatigue and low blood pressure from the meds until about last week am feeling the palpitations not as bad as before but they're there. Do you take the Propanol everyday ? When you do get the palpitations what to u do increase ur meds or just ride it out until it passes I know u said u get thumping in your chest do you feel fluttering as well ?

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Allyanna

Not every day sometimes I do in morning before work if feeling anxious. I try and breathe slower not sure if it helps . And yes sometimes flutter also x

gggg123 profile image
gggg123

I was excatly the same when my mother died of cancer. I had every cancer going, no I really did !. I always at the the doctors, always having tests, sitting there fearing everything. Then I started having anxiety attacks and thought those were a sign I definitely had it. Then the thoughts I had it were made worse by the thoughts that I'm now going insane too !. My mind had a mind if its own, I couldn't stop it. I actually wanted to shoot myself in head once because it wouldn't stop but guns are illegal in the UK so lucky brain, It didn't get blown out that day.

It will ease just try your best to survive until it does. Good luck, sorry I don't have a better answer.

fib4 profile image
fib4 in reply to gggg123

i know what you mean i have the same thoughts about dying from cancer everything i have is cancer in my mind i can't stop the thoughts. i know this may sound weird but i'm glad i'm not the only one with these thoughts. maybe we can help each other

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to fib4

Exactly so I am the same and thought I was the only one feeling so.

fib4 profile image
fib4 in reply to Allyanna

we have to come up with a game plan to defeat these feelings LOL!!!!!

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to fib4

I know but I don't know how so glad I came across this group , I now feel am not alone in these feelings that are consuming me.

fib4 profile image
fib4 in reply to Allyanna

how are you feeling today?

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to fib4

Hi , thank u for asking I am better today taking it one day at a time . I called the cardiologist today to sort out the side effects I'm having on the beta blockers I am on just bummed that he wants to see me for follow up in 12 days , hmm so long, with ecg and echo ..How are you doing ?

fib4 profile image
fib4 in reply to Allyanna

ups and downs today no sun raining all day. kind of makes it worse. i have heart palpitations most of my life had all kinds of tests nothing is ever wrong so they say. i won't take blockers they are hard to come off of you have to wean yourself can't just stop sometimes my mind just races around on it's own LOL!!!!!

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to fib4

Hi i didn't want to take beta blockers but I felt like I had no choice . Now the side effects of low blood pressure and fatigue are getting to me. I had only started getting palpitations twice b4 last year and it lasted a night . In February this year it's like it was constant and didn't want to go. I felt dizzy and a bit breathless I felt like I couldn't do anything at bed time I couldnt sleep because when I lie down I felt every beat of my heart and I was scared and it made my anxiety worse..the fact that it was not easing made me go by the cardiologist who did an ecg and echo everything was fine but heart rate 112 his diagnosis sinus tachycardia due to anxiety. How do you cope with the palpitations ? Is it constant ? Do you feel I'll with them like breathless/ dizziness ? When you are getting them what do you do to ease them ? Sorry for asking so much questions but I don't know anyone going through what I am and they are not understanding towards me , that is why i joined this forum . I am getting back some palpitations which is not as bad as b4 I hv a bp machine my heart rate is normal but I am feeling palpitations I don't know if it is because my bp is low. I hv an appointment on the 25th of this month by the cardiologist because I called and said I cannot deal with how I am feeling they suggest follow up and an ecg and echo again.is there such a thing as normal hear rate and palpitations ? Thank you for taking the time to answer me.

fib4 profile image
fib4 in reply to Allyanna

sometimes i can go for days and maybe a few weeks with no palpitations sometimes they are so bad i have to squat to ground level so my heart doesn't have to strain as much then i take deep breathes and meditate or i go outside to be alone and meditate and do the deep breathing that always brings it back to normal.

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

Propanalol plays havoc with my heart I get random heart feelings like my hearts almost missing.

My dad was fit and healthy had a stitch one day went to bed next thing we know it was terminal cancer and dead few months later,

So now I’m literally doctor google.

They say ignore triggers but it’s so hard.

I feel like such an insult to the people who genuinely are suffering from this horrible disease,

I wish I knew what to do

I take Ritalin for my adhd so know the stimulant effect of them agitates the anxiety started on 10mg of Citalopram doubt 10mg will touch me and no idea when I’m meant to ask for more. It’s only day 1 lol I’m very impatient!!! Was expecting some side effects at least so I knew it was working??? 🤷🏻‍♀️

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

Were all in this horrible boat together but I’m sure we can overcome it

It’s true as horrible as it is knowing others are suffering, to know we’re not alone makes it easier ❤️❤️❤️ much love to you all

By the way I’m a 34 yr old female from uk

Bit like the a/s/l on msn messenger ( am I showing my age now lol 😂)

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

So after a good day of anxiety..... it’s back right before bedtime telling me Her horrible poison again 😢

Lauriem4 profile image
Lauriem4 in reply to Nevic84

Hope you feel better soon I feel the same today 😪.are you in the UK?

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84 in reply to Lauriem4

Yes Newcastle x

kmcleodslc profile image
kmcleodslc

I am the same, I constantly think I have some kind of cancer. Colon, stomach, ovarian, cervical and oesophageal cancer are my “go to cancers” I have been diagnosed with GERD and IBS but In my head frank (the little demon voice) keeps telling me that I am riddled with cancer. I don’t go to the doctors as I am terrified I am right. I have only been a few times and every time I go they tell me everything is fine, I am reassured for a few days and then back to square one! It’s such a daily struggle and I try so hard to push these feelings away but sometimes I can’t. It’s so good to know that you’re not the only one out there with these problems. It makes it seem more manageable when you know there are others.

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84 in reply to kmcleodslc

I love that yours is called frank.... mine is Sheila

kmcleodslc profile image
kmcleodslc in reply to Nevic84

At least when we have a name we can curse them lol x

kenster1 profile image
kenster1

hi my dad had cancer although that wasn't his downfall.he died after an accident at hospital.my dad had back pain long term but never was blood tested till it was to late.i too have back pain and before my dad died he told me to get checked out so I did and thankfully it was all clear.long before he died I had a friend who only found out he had cancer weeks before he died he thought he only had shoulder and back pain due to work that freaked me because I had shoulder pains but I think its either just fibro or stress because I have pain all over.im sure you will have your mind put at ease after your tests in order to move forward with life.

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to kenster1

Hi , you sound just like me especially when I have pain all over my mind goes in overdrive. I am so sorry about your dad , both my dad and younger sister passed from cancer..if you don't mind my asking you said your dad had back pain , was his cancer related to the back pain ...i have constant back pain but never checked it out. I want to say hope u feel better but I know these feelings/ fears you just have to take it one day at a time.. take care

kenster1 profile image
kenster1 in reply to Allyanna

hi my dad had arthritis but and he kept going to the doctors.one said its your arthritis another said it was lumbago and not serious.obviously if they had done tests sooner he might have been here now.my back started getting sore years ago with working digging roads and then due to a severe back injury.between the two my backs been gone since 03 and I think that's how im now suffering pain in other parts.the physio told me two years ago I had an xray and all looked ok but hey that was 16 years ago.sorry to hear about your loss its horrible disease.

Allyanna profile image
Allyanna in reply to kenster1

Oh I am sorry to hear of your injury long term pains from injury is never easy to endure. I do hope you get relief for your back pains.

fib4 profile image
fib4

you sound just like me fear of all illnesses it really stresses your mind out with the constant thoughts

Nevic84 profile image
Nevic84

Anxiety seems to be playing games with me, day 3 of Citalopram worried it’s not working as zero side effects. Only 10mg they give me.

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