What to do when you're feeling better for a moment?

[Richy626]

Hey all recently I discussed the tug of war inside which I'm using acceptance to try and help me through, but here's one quandary that gets me and it got me yesterday it got me good, I started to feel better half way through my shift yesterday which was great, accepting how I felt and that I was going to feel afraid as a default reaction etc not being so worried about it, eventually I improved as the day wore on.

While I was more relaxed I began to over think I do this all the time, I'm trying to keep myself from getting worse again, eventually a thought went through my head I didn't do acceptance with and I started to go back down, so quickly after all that work I began to fear the feelings of fear what I'd be afraid of again, when this happens I also tend to give up on myself and by the end of yesterday I was once again back where I'd started and I knew it was all so pointless and I'd thrown away needlessly what could have been a good day which shot my confidence down also, I hate days like that a needless bad day.

But so often is the case when I'm feeling better I can't keep myself there, I can't seem to be able to float and accept that as well, that constant niggle from anxiety that you're going to get worse again, what is it you guys and girls do when you get to that stage?

Another reason I find it an issue is because getting worse at an ill opportuned moment like when you're about to go to sleep, feels worse then being bad most of the day and being able to at least relax a little when u roll into bed as an example.

Thanks as always for all your support.

Richard

[happy_kitty]

I think what might help you, if you haven’t tried it already, is meditating. Just a few minutes a day can make a difference, and it’s typically aimed at helping with exactly what you’re trying to do: allowing thoughts to pass without engaging them. The app called “Headspace” is great for getting started.

[designguy]

hello Richy, it's quite common to experience set backs as you make progress in your recovery, it's part of the learning process. The important thing is to try to not beat yourself up over it but treat yourself with the kindness as you would someone else. The other thing is that early on '"accepting" usually means tolerating the feelings/thoughts, which isn't the same thing as total acceptance. Total acceptance is total surrender and not caring whether you have the anxious feelings or thoughts at all and in fact, welcoming them. It takes time and sometimes baby steps, but you're on the right track.

[Richy626 in reply to designguy]

Thank you I needed to hear that tonight.

[Agora1 in reply to Richy626]

Richy, there are days that come that truly outshine others. I embrace them

and push aside any doubts in how long it may last. I use meditation and

deep breathing several times a day including upon awakening and before bed.

I agree with happy kitty in that this can help prolong that calm feeling so that

you can go to bed at night and get a good night's sleep.

[designguy in reply to Agora1]

Yes, for me meditation (I call it mindfulness) was and is still essential in learning to tolerate and accept the physical sensations of anxiety but more importantly my thoughts. it is the way to learn to let the thoughts come and go without attachment by just sitting with them and not reacting. Early on, i thought of it as a tv screen inside my mind with the sound turned off and the images/thoughts/words would just come and go and i learned to not pay attention or attach to them. Besides, it just feels good to sit, be still, be one with life and enjoy it.

[Agora1 in reply to designguy]

I agree designguy. An inner peace.

[crowningglory19]

Hi Richy, I"m sorry you had another bad day! It is tough when you feel defeated! Drop the yesterdays and let yourself relax. It is nothing more than a memory and has no hold on today or power over you unless you let it. I refuse to let those negative thoughts keep me from enjoying today, and control my mind to think of other things when they come around. I find that audio books help, just to entertain the mind, or at night when I lay down, if I can't listen to them I count like this: 1, 1000, 1, 1000, 3, 1000... it is enough to keep my mind busy but not too much for me to relax and sleep. Also, focus on relaxing all your face muscles, you can't think deep thoughts without frowning, so this stops them. Also, I have found that taking magnesium (magnesium malate is best) and ginseng helped me a lot w both, they calm the mind body and spirit and get rid of sticky negative thoughts the loop around in the mind. Also, getting outside, laying on the grass to get grounded and breathe in fresh air, looking at stars, these things help a lot too. Our environment help or hurt our mental health and physical health. Speak aloud positive truths to counteract the negative thoughts and things said to us. Also, Volunteering helps us get our of our own misery to help others, which helps us. Call those negatives a lie and correct them to yourself. Protect yourself from those who put that added stress on you and go out and do new challenging things. Hope this helps you too! =)