I cannot cope anymore: I don’t know what to... - Anxiety Support

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I cannot cope anymore

Minnie87 profile image
56 Replies

I don’t know what to do anymore.

I feel so physically horrific every second of the day with butterflies in my tummy,and lightheaded and surges of constant panic.i actually think I may have been experiencing a proper nervous breakdown.I’m fed up and want to be me again.i can barely get up off the sofa.

I’m not really asking anything.just wanted to write something as I’m desperate.

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Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87
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56 Replies
mags78 profile image
mags78

I know the feeling! I can only promise you it will pass. Even if it was to come back again, there will be a time when you are free from the pain and for those moments it is worth living and pushing through. It always gets better in the end. Stay strong and tell yourself it will pass, it WILL pass! Do you have anyone to talk to? Or hug right now? Or do you just prefer to be alone sometimes. I do. Are you on any medication?

mags78 profile image
mags78

I am also a sufferer of terrible health anxiety. It makes me so ill sometimes that i think i may faint. I had numerous blood tests too and such bad symptoms that i would never thought anxiety can cause them! Every time every test was clear and doctors keep telling me that fatigue is one of the main symptoms of stress, anxiety and mainly depression. After i manage to calm down my energy is back to normal and i feel fine. I had lots of setbacks of anxiety though through my life and i just learnt to live with them. Because for those shorter or longer periods free from this nightmare life really feels good. Take care x

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to mags78

Thank you so much for your reply.i really appreciate it.

I too have had full blood tests,ecgs,thyroid check,blood pressure the list goes on.

I’ve had anxiety since I was a child but never like this and I have no idea what has triggered it this time.

I’m desperate to get better but horrendously scared of taking medicine.i feel like I’m letting my whole family down who are desperate to see me better.

Anxiety is so cruel and I wouldn’t wish it on my worst enemy.

Thank you so much for your messages x

Sweepy13 profile image
Sweepy13 in reply to Minnie87

Big hug .... I get it, I’m currently suffering from panic attacks and that fear feeling and it’s appeared out of nowhere I’m in the best place lots to be happy about but it’s like I won’t let myself relax .... after 4 months of trying and tests I’ve given in to low dose of citalopram early days but see how I go

Take care.... we will get there

mags78 profile image
mags78 in reply to Minnie87

Consider taking the medication. You will feel better. Years ago i was in the opposite situation, i felt so depressed and ill that i was begging my GP for medication. He kept saying i should try to wait it over, then offered cbt but was very unwilling to prescribe me medication. I went to see a private doctor who gave me Prozac straightaway and i was so unwell and desperate to feel better that i did not even read the long label about side effects etc. And luckily for me i didnt have any side effects and after a week or two i already felt calmer until it actually cured me after 4-5 months. But maybe because i am a great believer in medication. I told myself - i am supplying my brain with a cure in this pill, it will help! Believing in that cure made a big difference to my mental state but also the fact that i was so physically tired of feeling low that i eventually hit the bottom, i gave up and i told myself: now the only thing i can do is persevere, be patient, accept the symptoms and learn to live with them until medication kicks in. And it happened! My anxiety used to be triggered by something specific and i used to have one or two short bouts in a year. At the moment there is no warning and only this year i had about 5-6 bouts. I just sometimes wake up with it. And all that keeps me going is the fact that i know it will pass and i will be calm again. I must have had hundreads of bouts of anxiety since i was a child. And my anxiety is very mean - as soon as i accept and learn to live with one symptom, it surprises me with something new. For example i used to worry about heart attack and uneven heart beat. Then i understood it cant kill me so i stopped noticing those symptoms and stopped worrying about my heart. Soon after i got dizzy spells and feeling faint. Again, when i accepted that it is ”just” anxiety (after lots of tests and scans though) they went away. And recently i have been getting tummy problems, nausea and fatigue, frequent visits to the toilet etc. And i started to worry about stomach or pancreatic cancer. Did some tests, got reassured and symptoms went away. Now im just waiting whats next! 🙈 😬😂 I just accepted it as a part of my life. Just like Dr Claire Weekes writes in her books- accept and ride it out. You will get better. Hugs x

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to mags78

Thank you so much for your detailed reply.it does help so much.everything you have said resonates with me.

I think feeling like your the only one makes it 10 times worse, so nice to know I’m not alone x

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to mags78

And I totally agree about medication.

You have to have a good mindset and believe it will make you better x

Chellybean18 profile image
Chellybean18

Minnie! You sound just like me. I have anxiety 24/7 and have butterflies and am scared all the time. Mine was triggered back in August due to a fight with someone...ever since my anxiety has been sooo bad. All i can say is stay strong. Have you been to therapy or anything? I see a psychiatrist Tuesday so I'm hoping to find some relief. Xo

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Chellybean18

Omg yes you sound just like me!

Well it’s good to “meet” you!

I’m waiting for my therapy to start.its taking ages!

That’s great you are seeing a psychiatrist.hopefully it will help you.

Do you take meds? Xx

Chellybean18 profile image
Chellybean18 in reply to Minnie87

Nice to meet you too hun ☺☺ but yes my appt has taken soo long to get here ugh but im so close cant stop now! Haha. And no I dont take meds yet buut I think I am going to need too :( just can't get over the panic ams fear daily! Its been this way for almost 4 months now...

Chellybean18 profile image
Chellybean18 in reply to Chellybean18

And*

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Chellybean18

It’s just the worst isn’t it.theres no worse feeling than severe anxiety.its life changing and terrifying.

Ive had anxiety my whole life but never this severe xx

Chellybean18 profile image
Chellybean18 in reply to Minnie87

Oh same here! I had my first panic attacks at age 13 and for years they were controlled...then life went downhill and I struggled bad again. It's so severe now :( I didnt think anxiety could get worse and worse

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Chellybean18

Same.i thought I had had bad anxiety in the past that had lasted a couple of months, but this is something else.

There’s no break or rest at all from the moment I get up till the minute I go to bed.its just awful.especially when you have no idea what the trigger is! Do you live a normalish life?i don’t leave the house xx

Chellybean18 profile image
Chellybean18 in reply to Minnie87

Eh my life is kinda normal. Its so difficult though. I work and have little breakdowns at my desk then come home and feel a tiny bit bettter but my inner voice is always telling me im just gonna die or something 😭

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Chellybean18

That’s amazing that you still live quite normally.well done! X

in reply to Minnie87

Mi niw you sound just like me

in reply to Minnie87

Same here these last 6 months have been a living hell from anxiety..: today I have a pounding headache and feel confused... went and googled and now I’m freaking out even more... it never ends

Chellybean18 profile image
Chellybean18 in reply to

😭😭I feel confused a lot too and overwhelmed...

DisneyMom3 profile image
DisneyMom3

I know exactly how you are feeling.. I will go weeks feeling this way and then feel ok for a day or two then back to feeling like that again. It’s so hard. I tried to fight it on my own but I just can’t anymore. I’m 25 with a husband and 3 kids who need all of my not just the tired, wore down me. They know i get anxious and I hate that. I started my new meds today and I pray they help! I hope you find something that helps you.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to DisneyMom3

Well done for taking the meds.thats amazing.hopefully they will work wonders for you.i totally get what you mean about having kids and a partner who need you.it makes you miss out on so much too.its really cruel x

Anxiousdude profile image
Anxiousdude

I know how you feel. I literally didn’t get out of bed for months. It isn’t easy. Try and rest and know that you’ll be fine.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Anxiousdude

Wow really,I’m becoming like that.

How did you break free of it?

Anxiousdude profile image
Anxiousdude in reply to Minnie87

I literally had to force myself out of bed. I remember I had to help someone move and I was having palpitions the whole time. That was two years ago and I’m still struggling. The symptoms somewhat stopped for a while when I got a job to keep myself busy. 6 months later I hurt my back and a whole different array of symptoms began. I feel for you this is not an easy thing to beat. All the best. One day at a time.

Delzek profile image
Delzek

Hi Minnie, I know it may not seem like it but it will get better. I have been and still go through it. I have found if I push myself to I can turn the panic attacks away by either taking medication or even by trying to occupy my mind on something else, I am Proudly Owned by three Parrots who seem to know when I am going through a bad time and they make me laugh which does appear to help, I hope you find something that will take your mind off it, and feel better soon. All the best Del

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Delzek

Thank you so much for your reply.

So nice to know I’m not alone and that people have got better.i just can’t see the wood from the trees at the moment.so nice that you have your parrots to comfort you and make you laugh too.distraction is so helpful.

Delzek profile image
Delzek in reply to Minnie87

Stop looking for the wood and see the tree's ! Sometimes we try to hard and that hinders any positives,you know like when you lose your keys search and search you can't find them, then someone comes in you tell them you have been looking for your keys,they point to them straight away! You think well I looked there but didn't see them? Trying to see positive things when you are ill is the same the harder you look or the harder you try nothing seems to be helping! Well that's the time to sit back either talk to someone or do what I have "Just" started and that's write down exactly how you feel at the moment, then have a look when you next write it down and see if anything has changed. If after writing things down you still feel the same change something little that makes you feel better and keep doing it until you no longer feel horrific or panicky I have been told that works for some people that's why I am going to try it ! Good Luck Minnie

Del

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87

How are you getting on with yours?

captained49 profile image
captained49

Make yourself Move all day

Hi Minnie,

I'm really sorry you are experiencing debilitating anxiety. I've been there myself and I know how incredibly desperate you must feel. Scared, stuck, anxious and depressed with a sense of little hope for coming through this. I had the worst of anxiety when I was in my mid 20's (and that was a long time ago) so I want you to know that even though you feel like there is no way out, I want to absolutely assure that there is.

The feelings you're having won't necessarily go completely away, but you can reduce their intensity by facing them and doing what needs to be done anyway. What I'm going to tell you may sound a little harsh, but the spirit is about helping you push through this and feel better.

You need to develop a plan on coming through and dealing with your anxiety. There are numerous tools and resources available now...youtube videos, books on mp3, internet resources, etc. You can gather these resources and go through them to find the ones to help you cope. There are apps you can download on your phone, too.

You need to do two things: Push yourself to do the best you can each day while learning to not let the anxiety force you to become homebound (I was housebound for months when I was 26). And you need to get proper support from fellow anxious people (like us here).

You mustn't give up. You must reach very deep down inside of you and tap that courage you have.

I want you to know that you can move through this...that many of us have...that you aren't alone...and that no matter how frightened you may feel, it won't last forever. Relax into the feelings and give yourself permission to be exactly as you are.

Bat.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to

Wow thank you so much for your reply.it was like you were talking about me!thats exactly how I feel.that little rational glimmer of hope keeps me going.

Your message has really helped me.and I will refer back to it when I need that extra reassurance.

Glad you are doing well now.

Darryl profile image
DarrylPartner

Thanks for sharing. Almost all of us here have had the same feelings. Time shows us we can get past it. And do use the resources listed in the pinned post on the right

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Darryl

Thank you.i love being on this forum.

It really helps me.

Reeceredd profile image
Reeceredd

Theres a great recovery programm online called “The Lindon Menthod” you should try it i saved my life

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Reeceredd

Thank you,I will have a look at that now.

Sweepy13 profile image
Sweepy13

Well it’s took a week of ups and downs but I think I’m beginning to feel some positive impact, I get mild headache I still have mild symptoms and keep suffering from trapped gas but I’m staying positive

... still disappointed I couldn’t cope without pills but I had too many physical symptoms so something had to give and as my loving partner said “why waste time trying to fight it when you can try something that might fix it”

Hope you are doing ok

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Sweepy13

I think you have made a great decision.the hardest bit is the thought of it I think x

kama24 profile image
kama24

I can so relate to what you are saying. Unfortunately for me it is now 3 yrs of it on a daily basis. I won't even bother to list all I've tried, including prescription meds, a naturopath, acupuncture, you name it. I tell my husband I'm sick of waking up with fear in my gut and shaking like a leaf. It just is not logical yet it is there! Try to keep busy doing something, have the radio on, just keep plugging along. At least we know we are not alone in this. My thoughts are with you.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to kama24

Bless you.if you ever want to chat I’m here x

Jitterychic profile image
Jitterychic

I know the feeling. It led me to Takotsubo syndrome. I' d like to say there ks some magic pill that will make you better. But nope. Seek help. Therapy maybe. If you don't it will take a toll on you.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Jitterychic

I don’t want any negative replies please.ive been told by my doctor that anxiety cannot hurt me.so I’m sticking with that.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Minnie87

And there are pills that can help.many people I have known have taken pills and got better.

Darryl profile image
DarrylPartner in reply to Minnie87

Hi Minnie87. You have received many wonderful and supportive replies. Jitterychick is being supportive, too. It may seem like a negative reply but I am sure it is made with good intentions...and, to many of us, it doesn’t seem negative at all. We are all trying to help each other in our own special ways

19malpas profile image
19malpas

Hi Minnie, i am also the same as you in a bad way at the moment, waiting to try a change in meds not looking forward to it but need something, this site is good if you need support,perhaps if you tried a small dose of something thay do help.👍

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to 19malpas

Thank you so much.

I agree with you totally.

Well done for starting your meds😊

in reply to Minnie87

Minnie I just had a baby a year ago so I’m on a Mommy blog... I cannot tell you how many moms are taking zoloft and have wrote to me that it has saved there lives literally ... some moms are like us , some depressed, some feel angry and uncontrollable thoughts... I wrote a post one day and asked who takes zoloft bc I’m scared to take it and all I heard is positive stuff... many people can be negative in here but I like that sight bc these are all Mothers going through it ..

in reply to

It’s pulling me closer to taking mine

Hi Minnie

I'm also like you and go through some really debilitating patches of anxiety where it wakes me up at night and continues all day. A few weeks ago was the final straw and after being afraid of medication for so long I forced myself to take it. I had to change to a different one after a week and was suffering very bad panic attacks, the Dr gave me diazipam to take until my new meds started to work and my husband had to force it into my mouth I was so afraid to take it... But I did and now the symptoms are starting to ease after a shakey start. You can do it. I've had anxiety for about 14 years and I feel the older I get the worse I have it. I can't see a mental health worker until January as there's no one available, but medication is definitely helping. I can't tell you to take it, but it sounds like your at rock bottom now and the only way is up, and by starting medication you could start the road to 'recovery' and living with this! Be strong, you sound like you have a good family around you as I do, and that will help you to get there ... Always here if you want a chat, take care x

Jitterychic profile image
Jitterychic

I am sorry didn't mean to make you feel that way. My apologies. Feel better soon.

Minnie87 profile image
Minnie87 in reply to Jitterychic

That’s okay.no problem.im just too sensitive to things x

Sweepy13 profile image
Sweepy13

Hi I’m on 10mg of citalopram started splitting them into half so I could manage work but now I’m on the 10 which is a low dose .... I tried not to read too much about them or they would have been in the bin!! (I google far to much and then panic about what I read) Just telling myself it’s short term and this will help x

Anxiousdude profile image
Anxiousdude

How are you doing today? I hope you are feeling a bit better. I went outside to run an errand today and the sun cheered me up some. I don’t know if that helps.

laruecharles profile image
laruecharles

Try lavender essential oil. I am coping with heart palpitations which got much worse during the 18 months my wife was in hospice. She has since passed away. I am scheduled for surgery for the palpitations. Meanwhile, to bridge me over, I found that smelling lavender essential oil throughout the day relaxes me and prevents palpitations. I'm even considering cancelling the surgery. Lavender is calming and causes the brain to generate endorphins which are relaxing.

Gogo1 profile image
Gogo1

There is an answer please do call on the name with the Lord say “Jesus ,master, have mercy on me” he will answer you, he did it for me he can do it for you, Don’t be afraid to take meds if they will help you to calm down so that you can focus on this prayer, in Jesus name , I know what it feels like it is horrible did you make it through

Sweepy13 profile image
Sweepy13

I did 5mg for 6 days then I had a tablet which hadn’t split well so took that then moved to 10 few days ago... upto now not feeling any new side effects and actually if I dare say I think they are less, my partner has taken them and says one day soon all side effects will suddenly disappear

My side effects have been very loud tummy sounds and indigestion but then I do have ibs anyway, I also still have mild anxiety symptoms chest/throat tightness but if I dare say I think this is getting less I have a very slight spacey feeling

My advice would be take care of yourself slow yourself down rest as often as you can, I have a busy job so booked a few days leave and we went to the lakes for two days so I could just do nothing but that might not be possible for you, but just take a bit of time each day to slow down

We will get there, I’m telling myself this is a short term fix and I will get back to being me but to do that I need a little bit of help 😊

Take care x

Sweepy13 profile image
Sweepy13

Gosh we do sound the same that’s sooooo reassuring... yes we are in a small hotel opposite lake Windermere and it’s really been restful

I’m so glad to hear you have the rumbles too that made me smile 😊

I’m the same I seem to want to graze my way through the day x

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