Looking back I've been a worrier since I was 8, I've always had a wild imagination and in my teenage years I started worrying about my health and that's when I developed OCD. However I lived a great normal life I did not have any physical symptoms and in general I was happy and able to live normally. I think in my 20s coffe made me feel nervous I would describe it to people as if feeling like I was about to go into a job interview.
Anyway my point to all this is only at the age of 30, 2 months after having my second child did I develop these debilitating physical symptoms and a full blown mental disorder and it's been 3 long years up and down.
Anyone have some insight into why only now I experience such terrible physical anxiety when before it was only really mental? And anyone else had a similar experience?
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Aazz
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Me too, like you and scarediam, I spent a lot of time worrying and was an anxious person, but didn't have these debilitating physical symptoms until after stressful events in my life--once after my 1st child, but not knowing what it was, I somehow got over it. Again, I started having daily panic attacks a few months after my Dad's death. That's when I ended up taking Zoloft (after trying others) and I did eventually get better and was still fine when I weaned off the drug after about 8 mos, but I still had not figured out what was wrong with me. I thought, like my doctor said, I would need medication possibly for the rest of my life. But, I was fine, other than "mental anxiety", for about 15 years until more life stressors came along in 2015, and with them, major anxiety symptoms! I had a constant nervous feeling in my stomach, shortness of breath, tightness in chest, insomnia, heart skipping beats, agitation, hairloss, had to quit my teaching job & took time off from my hospital job and got help homeschooling my children... I thought I was dying from some undiagnosed disease. This is when I read Claire Weekes' book and began to understand what was happening. I read Paul David's book, studied the info on anxietycentre.com, and spoke with one of their counselors. I decided to work on the root problem, my worrying and negative thinking, minimize stress, learn to truly trust God, and to let my nerves heal without using meds this time, which I did. Well, I was 95% well, working again, travelling, for 6 mos to a year, when another stressor came along, and my symptoms returned. Following my Mom's death this year in March, I became very symptomatic, this time, panic attacks, waking up in the night with my heart racing and getting lots of skipped beats, and exhaustion. I know what it is, so even though I did let it scare me, and fed the anxiety, I am now doing better at accepting my symptoms with a welcome attitude towards them, and lo and behold the panic attacks have stopped. I still feel on edge, jittery, get scattered missed beats, and get out of breath and exhausted easily. Like the previous poster, my symptoms are also worse the week before I start & WAY worse the night before! I think the changing hormones stress the body adding to the problem. Same for after having a child. The hormones can add stress and make an anxious person feel worse, but once the anxiety is under control, the hormones will have a less deleterious effect. Blessings and peace to you...
Thanks again, great reply 😀 I'm not doing to good at the moment. My way of dealing with it especially when I'm lightheaded is to lay down and rest and usually an episode will pass but getting that break is sometimes impossible with small kids who don't give you a second of peace and I just really let out my frustrations on my 4 years old, I feel terrible yelling at him but he does not stop when he wants something! Just venting but thanks again 😊
Ok... since I have been there, let me share what I have learned. 1) Yes to rest! I also had to lie down (still do) to feel better. And that's ok. Sometimes you can involve your kids while lying down, like reading to them. Draw letters on each other's backs & guess what they are. Sitting in the bed you can play educational games. We loved the card game, Set, a game of patterns, which is good for quick thinking skills. We played Crab where my hand would appear out from under a pillow and grab a leg if they didn't hit it to stop it 1st, haha. And, ask for help. Do you have a relative, who could help out 1 day/week while you heal. 2) Change how you view their behavior. You can experience total peace no matter how he/she is behaving. If he's being demanding, you think, "Oh, here's my opportunity to model peace and love him unconditionally." Remember this-- if you come home and your child has broken every window in the house, or if you come home and your child has washed the windows, you act exactly the same way. As [Christian] parents, we get our value based on who we are in Christ and we shouldn't change based on our children's behavior. Practice being unaffected by your child's miscreant actions, which are a normal part of childhood as you train him patiently & lovingly and this will help you stay calm while your nerves heal. 3) Practice not stressing or worrying at all. Pray instead. Laugh a lot. Realize that one day you will look back and see how this anxiety problem helped make you a stronger, better person. It is your friend. Let the symptoms come as they are part of your training much like the discipline you administer to train your child. Know you will have peace again. Rest, work on your thinking, do what you have to do to heal, but try to enjoy each day with your littles. Joy can shine through your symptoms while you wait patiently for healing.
Usagold, what an enlightening response. I so enjoyed reading it. I couldn't help but smile when you mentioned about drawing letters on each other's backs and guess what they are. Gee I use to play that with my daughter when she was little, never knew anyone else who did.
I too have always worked around my symptoms when my daughter was young. Maybe a lot more quiet activities on certain days but the fact we did them together is what counted.
I have always made sure to use laughter as an outlet for stress both for myself and others. When I look back, there were a lot of tough times with my daughter, first as a foster child and then an adopted daughter. But the one thing I know is that I was always there for her which made every day worthwhile. Thanks for sharing. Make it a good day xx
I forgot to add something to the important piece of parenting advice. If you come home and your children have broken every window in the house, or if you come home and your children have wash the windows, you act exactly the same way, the only thing that changes are the consequences. I left that out. Of course, there should be consequences for bad behavior, just not in how we behave as parents. We don't have to yell or feel stress, we simply administer the consequences of bad behavior, so they know that's how life works.
Aazz, may I suggest that when the 4yo keeps up his antics, until he gets what he wants, leave the room. IGNORE him. ( it is OK you can do this) You CAN hold out longer than he can, and it teaches him self modulating behaviors. KIDS NEED to know that they can not beat ya down. Be strong. Turn your back and keep it turned if you can't leave the room. fill us in on how it goes
I try my best, but I don't think you have met a more persistent child, he once sat next to his father while his father played video games and repeated "can I play" over and over For almost 2 hours (I don't let him play games). But that is how persistent he is and it drives me crazy, in every other way he is perfect but people keep telling me his persistence will be a good quality when he is older. Lol
and if you don't "nip it in the bud" at 4, you get a kid like the one I raised, who at 17 comes home and said he joined the Army, at 20 we get a call from an Army Hospital saying he was on life support, we found out he married a 17 yo, and drank himself into a coma. FF to age 26, has a 6 year old son, a wife who works night at a bar. She fights, drinks and screams in front of kid. Gets pregnant by boyfriend from bar........ This does not end well...........so please fight the good fight when the kids are small...........;(
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