Constant worries

[Firecat9]

Hi all, I've just joined here to see can I find people with similar experiences as mine and maybe help others too.

I'm 42 and a single mum of 4 kids 3 of which are still young. I've suffered anxiety and panic attacks from as young as 6 and was sexually abused as a child when my parents used to leave me being minded for weeks in the summer with my grandparents.

I spend a few years dealing with all this in my 20s and thought I had put it behind me but it keeps coming back and now I find it hard with my own children to not worry over them and leaving them gives me awful anxiety.

My youngest daughter is 8 and gets nose bleeds and has fainted a few times if she hasnt drank or eaten and I've got her checked out and all seems fine but I can't seem to stop stressing and worrying all the time.

I have anxiety symptoms like the usual ones feel dizzy, heart palpitations, feel like I can't breathe right, derealisation where things feel alien and I feel I'm going crazy.

I really want to be able to live a happy life, to do fun things and enjoy my kids without always worrying but I find it so hard planning trips or travelling and have little to none support with them and find it hard the thoughts of meeting someone new or trusting anyone after being treated badly and cheated on with the kids dad.

Sorry long first post, I hope to get to know some of you here and find stuff in common. Sometimes I feel so alone with all the constant inner battles in my head and self talk that I do to keep me steady!

I currently take no tablets, I had been on lexapro which did help but I went off them after 6 months as I felt depressed and other side effects. My doctor reluctantly gave me 12 xanax a month ago which I take on bad days but I doubt she will give me more as she is against them even though I find they help a lot.

Has anyone had any success with st johns wort or other natural remedies? I take iodine, b complex and magnesium. Thanks for listening if you got this far xx

[KGanesh]

Please read self help books like you can heal your life.

How stop worrying and start living

[Michele_B in reply to KGanesh]

What self-help books do you recommend? I read the DARE one and it did help a little but I'd definitely be interested in reading more.

[Jeff1943]

Life still lies ahead of you, Firecat9, you've more than half a life left. You've been treated badly in the past but we can't change one minute of it, it's gone, left its scars maybe, but it's time to draw a line under it.

The symptoms of anxiety you mention we've all had some time or another, over sensitised nerves send them to frighten us. But if we resolutely refuse to be frightened by them and simply accept them for the time being we stop re-sensitising our nervous system every five minutes and we begin to recover. Anxiety makes us think we have all sorts of hidious illnesses, we always fall for it and fear the worse, but they're all fake, not real, so we should laugh in their face, accept them and get on with our lives. I have used the word Accept twice in this para, that is of significance.

Xanax are good to take now and then when things become unbearable or we need to be on top form, just for a day, two at the most. You have to convince your doctor you are a responsible user, that you don't like taking them and know all the dangers of regular use leading to addiction, but they make the difference between coping and not coping sonetimes, so can I have another smalk prescription of them please doctor.

I hope it is your destiny to meet someone new who has a good heart and is fun to share your life and problems with, that would be the best tranquiliser of all, in the meantime you have the Xanax and the knowkedge that Acceptance can free you of the anxiety causing symptoms causing anxiety causing symptoms syndrome. Did I mention Green Tea? It comes in tea bags or tablet form, the L-Thianine it contains counteracts the stress hormone cortisol which causes anxiety, particularly first thing in the morning. Worth a try, since I started using it to begin the day my valium intake has dropped to nothing, may be the placebo effect but I say if it works don't fix it.