I just want to feel my happy self Again !!!

[Peacewithin1]

I'm sick of feeling afraid and anxious and thinking I'm going to die every day!

[Hidden]

Hello Tanae.

Try to keep yourself busy, do more of the things that you really enjoy doing, go learn new things, achieve! Don't give yourself as much time to think about negative things.

You need to take your mind off it all by keeping busy. Also some foods like bananas can help with anxiety, give them a try if you haven't already.

Good luck to you.

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Hidden]

Thank You So much. Here it's so much snow, I've been in the house for almost a week and it's not helping. Thank You for your response.

[Hidden in reply to Peacewithin1]

I love snow I wish we got a load of it, we get nothing but rain here.

You are welcome.

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Hidden]

Lol wow, I love the rain, especially when the weather is warm. It's very Therapeutic!

[Hidden in reply to Peacewithin1]

I like the rain but I do like a break from it lol It isn't warm here much either, well we get a bit of heat in summer but nothing to shout about.

[Andrea1915]

Me toooo!!!

[Cjonesabq]

I too have days where i feel just the same. It can be the hardest thing to simply shower and dress but take that one small step, it helps.

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Cjonesabq]

Yes the smallest steps. You're so right. Thank You

[Andrea1915]

I know how you feel without this forum I didn't realize just how many people feel the same way I do being in this state of mind can feel very lonely you feel like your the only one who isn't enjoying life who is stuck in their minds obsessing on thoughts of what ifs focusing on bodily sensations it's unbearable sometimes and you wonder how your going to get through life this way I wish i knew how to fix myself and all others who battle anxiety. 😔

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Andrea1915]

Yes I so agree. I wish I had a cure, I would share it with the World for sure.

[Vbee]

Action and distraction! Go and build a snowman and don't wear gloves - the pain of your fingers will take your mind off anxiety! Seriously though, action and movement is the enemy of anxiety - doing something involves a different part of your brain so anxiety and action have trouble sitting next to each other. Good luck - think of us here in Australia- 35 deg celcius - that might warm you up!! Just about to have a swim in the pool now and float - I'll send you all peaceful relaxed floating thoughts x

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Vbee]

Thank You so much! Enjoy 😊

[Bluswife]

I know where I r coming from I hate. Worry to the point I am shaky and can't breath but it will get better that's what I keep telling my self

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Bluswife]

Yes I shake and go in to a panic. We will get through this! Thank You 😊

[Bluswife]

Yes we will mines has gotten better started 8 weeks ago and has gotten better over the last two weeks

[kama24]

I truly know how you feel and it gets to a point where you feel desperate and hopeless. It is going on 2 yrs now of constant daily panic and anxiety.....I've tried everything I can think of to no avail. If we KNOW in our mind that what we are dealing with is not (in most cases) real, then why can't we overcome and break free?

[Peacewithin1 in reply to kama24]

I wish I had an answer lol. It's exhausting though. I'm trying to act happy in front of my Family so they won't worry but I'm ready for better days.

[kama24 in reply to Peacewithin1]

at times I cannot fake it, the trembling is terrible also the look on my face....I do try to reason with ME but ME is not listening!

[Peacewithin1 in reply to kama24]

Yes I so understand. Something has to give. I was online trying to research "how to be happy" I saw something about Serotonin and B6 Supplements. I'm going to look more in to it. I'm Grateful to know I'm Healthy so once I figure it out I will let you Guys know.

[kama24 in reply to Peacewithin1]

I take B12 and B 3 at drs suggestion....Dr. Oz had a show telling how lack of B12 can cause anxiety. You can also buy a SAD lamp for fall/winter weather.....I didn't find it helped me. I would just like to be able to say STOP THIS and have it STOP

[Peacewithin1 in reply to kama24]

Oh wow yes I saw that episode , My Mom recorded it for me one day to watch. Very interesting. I have a Dr's. Appointment coming up, I'm going to ask about the B12 and B3 Thanks so much! Maybe I'll try the lamp too, anything to make it better. We're having winter weather now. It would be nice if it came with a permanent "off" switch lol.

[kama24 in reply to Peacewithin1]

I WAS taking B12 but only once a week as per family dr. I now take it daily sublingual. It can't hurt. Our winter went to +12c yesterday and today...it will be back with a vengeance!

[Peacewithin1 in reply to kama24]

I see. I'm going to try smoothies for the time being. I was reading about mood boosting smoothies. And then next week I will speak with my Dr. If I'm not mistaken 12c is about the same as 53F I think lol. Our weather may be the same and the good thing is, it's clearing up the snow so soon I'll be able to get out and walk a little.

[kama24 in reply to Peacewithin1]

hi, have you ever heard of "tapping" for anxiety? lol I have tried everything, hoping for help, its worth a try! I hope the smoothies work for you. You are right on, it was 53F yesterday, VERY abnormal for us, it would normally be -15 to -20c!! Today we are at zero or 32F I am plagued with an oddity for the last 5 months. I normally am not too bad and almost "human" in late afternoons/supper time/ and bed time. I sleep well. BUT the moment I wake I start to feel "fear" and that I'm short of breath. I've tried to reason it out, to no avail. It doesn't make sense. I try not to dwell on my breathing, using mindfulness they taught us in CBT class but it remains. I try to keep busy. Often I have to resort to an Ativan. I don't want to even think about spending the remainder of my life like this. There just has to be an ans. Perhaps you would find this interesting

youtube.com/watch?v=OZqHRCB...(Not working as expected?)

[Peacewithin1 in reply to kama24]

Hi, I heard of tapping for pain but never for anxiety. Now this is definitely interesting lol. Thank You for sharing. I honestly go through the same thing when I wake up, I start to feel fear and feel like my breathing isn't right. Throughout the day I try to keep busy and not notice every little thing going on with my body. I'm going to let you know how the mood boosting smoothie works and try the tapping lol.

[kama24 in reply to Peacewithin1]

I'm glad I sent the link! Yes, mornings are the worse for me even when I try to reason with myself. I do the tapping, not that it has "cured" me but what can it hurt? I see my physciatrist on the 28th. Frankly I don't know what to say to him! My meds don't seem to take away the fear but I do believe I'd be MUCH worse without them. I am thankful I have Ativan when it is a really bad time. There is another link I found and try here and there......I'd try most anything. Yes do let me know if the smoothies help and how to make them. I KNOW I talk a lot about my fears and how I feel, and I know it must drive my husband nuts, he is my rock, but has no answers. My biggest FEAR is of death....it haunts me daily and irks me that I cannot delete it.

youtube.com/watch?v=2B6YsOo...(Not working as expected?)

[Peacewithin1 in reply to kama24]

Finally someone who understands Lol! My biggest fear is death as well. My Husband has been feeling my sour moods for the last few months and I feel bad about that. I don't take any meds and I'm seeing a physciatrist for the 1st time March 10th and I have a Dr's appt for blood work on the 27th. How long have you been seeing your psychiatrist?

[kama24 in reply to Peacewithin1]

I am on the 2nd psychiatrist....the lst one was a wonderful man, like a father. Sadly he passed away then it was impossible to find one taking new patients. I went for about 6 yrs with non but have been going to the new fellow for 3 yrs now. He is not like my other one....he mostly "listens" my other one took part in conversations as he too had panic attacks in university....he went above and beyond to help me when I had difficult situations to go through ie surgery, medical tests. I have attended CBT classes ....they gave good suggestions etc and made sense but it's "me" lol I take Luvox and serequel......I had a HORRRRRIBLE withdrawal experience from Paxil which I took for 18 yrs (it DID help me but when time came to stop it I was ill for a yr and a half, all kinds of tests, ER, NO life at all) Now it's when I wake I start to think I can't breathe then it lingers and although I keep busy and talk to myself it's hard to fight. My lst dr. thought my fear of death stemmed from childhood....from age 3 I was taken to relatives funerals, in those days they were laid out in their living rooms. I was told "they are asleep" ever think about Now I lay me down to sleep prayer? If I should die before I wake!!! NOW they have changed the wording. We sound like long lost sisters lol

[Agora1 in reply to kama24]

kama24, I know how hard that is to lose a favorite doctor or two. There was a time that I had a team of doctors (that's what I called it) who took care of every part of my mind and body. I felt secure and safe. As each one retired or passed away, the anxiety would build. We don't like changes for sure. I've never really found a replacement for the old time doctors I once knew.

As for that prayer Now I lay me down to sleep, I can see where that could feed into anxiety about equating sleep with dying. Wow...

[kama24 in reply to Agora1]

yes, my dr. was actually speechless when I brought up about the prayer.....he sais he never thought about it, but it was worded to possibly bother some people. I worry about breathing so much......when my father passed I was with him.....listening to his laboured breathing....it was horrible, I can still hear it.......I guess "normal" people would not dwell...I am not normal

[Agora1 in reply to kama24]

dearest kama24, but you are normal, you just happen to have a heart of gold. It's people like all of us with anxiety who feel emotions more than others in that it stays within our mind and our being. I too was at my father's bedside in ICU when he passed as well as my mother's a few years ago.

Traumatic events can hinge onto our already anxious thoughts but eventually it should lessen.

For me, it was my father falling down the basement steps. For years, every time I would go down the stairs in my own home, I could literally see myself at the bottom lying there.

It does lessen over time, after all we are our own person and what happens to one doesn't mean it will happen to us. Let's breathe.....

[kama24 in reply to Agora1]

Thank you for your kind words. I am in tears. It has not been a good day for me with anxiety along with my irregular heart beat. The results have not come back yet from a heart test I had a week ago. I keep telling my mind to think of happy events in my life, and yes I can say I have had many. Actually I try to talk myself calm (or sane) but it seldom works. It feels like every door to me has been closed lately, and no one knows what to do to "fix" my thinker .....I have such a deep fear of death on top of it all. Thank you for taking the time to respond.

[Agora1 in reply to kama24]

kama, so sorry this has all brought you to tears. I know how that is. When so overwhelmed in thought, it is difficult to make our minds accept the happier time in our lives. Regaining some calm doesn't work if you try when things have gotten so down, so bad. I practice meditation and deep breathing every single day almost like building a savings in the bank. In that respect, I've got something to fall back on during those horrible days. Believe me, we all get them. Because I have retrained my mind, instant relaxation and acceptance come easier than it did years ago.

I've been to that point where doctors gave up on me and no longer knew what to say or what to do because nothing worked. I literally cried every single day for 6 years straight. I felt more alone than I've ever felt in my life. That's what made me realize that I could not depend on anyone but myself to get out of this nightmare.

It took time and patience and perseverance but eventually, I won. And you will too kama. xx

[kama24 in reply to Agora1]

Good morning....I guess It is so seldom anyone listens to me or even wants to hear my woes. It's just me alone thinking. My husband asked me this morning if I practice the mindfulness I learned in glass...yes....but I till shake and am in fear. I'm going trough some heart tests right now, results not back yet. Last night the irregular beat was non stop and pain in left arm....I think I shook all night instead of slept. I even got up at 6am and took an Ativan...to no avail. If I have a day when I am "good" I do cherish it. I can understand your tears of desperation. I practice the "tapping" exercise I saw on youtube and a breathing one...I try music....and try to keep busy.....I got through the whole year of nausea, now it's been the fear and heart issues since last Oct. Death terrifies me. Thank you for your support.

[Agora1 in reply to kama24]

Good Morning kama, I know it's not easy. No one can possibly know what this relentless fear is like.

It's easy for others who don't experience anxiety to say, do this, do that, but when in that high state of anxiety, like you said even an Ativan didn't work.

That shows you how high the adrenaline is pumping fear in us. I know once you get the results back from your heart tests, the Ativan will work, your heart will relax and you'll be able to breathe again.

Good Luck with the test results. We are all here for each other. We're listening...x

[Stay_strong85]

Same here. 😧

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Stay_strong85]

One Day! When, idk 😥

[Hidden]

Story of my life!! Keeping busy helps but I always know I'll go back to it

[Peacewithin1 in reply to Hidden]

Yes I try to keep busy lately. Honestly at one point I didn't even want to leave the bed... baby steps lol