Partner holiday issue

[ohlord71]

Hello.

I'm new to this but looking for guidance on what might seem a trivial issue. My partner has anxiety issues, part of which means she cannot face going on holiday.

Thing is, I would really like to go on holiday.

Any suggestions on how we could deal with this would be most welcome.

[LottieDottie818]

What is it about going on holiday that makes her not want to?

I definitely get anxious with that but I force myself to do it. It's worth the experience and I tell myself "even if I'm actually sick isn't it better to do something fun than just sit a home and feel sick?"

I've had panic attacks while on holiday, but it was still worth it to go

[ohlord71 in reply to LottieDottie818]

Thanks for your reply. The prospect of going and leaving her home is the problem. She's ok most of time if we go away but has panic attacks.

[goldfishpainter]

I hate vacations. I've just opted out of one last week, and I LOVE having that option. A vacation to me is an extended psychotic episode. I do not know how your partner would feel about staying home while you go on vacation, but it's something I would definitely encourage my husband to do. Just my experience.

[ohlord71 in reply to goldfishpainter]

Thanks for your help.

[Cat33]

I can understand how she feels as I used to be the same Holidays to me seemed a nightmare rather than a really happy thing to look forward to

I always went and always had a lovely time It's the anticipation beforehand the what ifs On the day I never wanted to go and would have loved it to be cancelled

I would sit down and talk to her about what it is about the hoilday that she is worried about Then give her loads of reassurance that you will be there by her side Break things down like the journey Going on a plane can be terrifying or long car journeys I've done both and just knowing my husband totally understood made it less of a trauma and more of a pleasure

It's not trivial as you love going on holiday and I know how that must affect the enjoyment of life

Does she do any relaxation techniques ? There are lovely videos on YouTube

One thing I would also avoid saying is "You'll be ok" I used to get very upset with my husband saying that it was almost like he was dismissing my worries Just keep telling her" I'm with you and I'll look after you "

Could you start with a weekend break not too far and then build up from there ?

I absolutely LOVE holidays now

I really hope that she will be able to enjoy a holiday You are wonderful to support her and care enough to get advice

Wishing you all the best and lots of happiness together 😆

[ohlord71]

Thanks so much for your reply. Small steps sound like the answer.