It keeps coming back..

Im on medication, although l hate taking it, as l believe we should be able to cope without it in some way, but l believe our lifestyle and modern society has made us like this. I am ok for a few months at a time, and then l hv a shock and it sets me right back into a wreck. I live on my own and its so hard to pick myself up. I hv a job to hold on to and now lm under investigation for hving too much time off. Its as if the company want to support you and lays down what a brilliant policy they hv on mental problems but only up to a degree. I cant carry on breaking down. I dont see the point anymore..

[Jeff1943]

Medications have their part to play in recovery from anxiety disorders and should be taken for short periods if you feel overwhelmed or have some major work/problem on but of course they won't offer you a cure. Did you know that valium/diazepam was originally obtained from the rawalwulfa root found in India and used for tranquilation for many hundreds of years - Mahatma Ghandi started the day with a bowl of porridge made from the rawalwulfa root!

Don't worry about the investigation into the time you have had off, tell them you've been ill but think you're improving, just playmit as a game, the person interviewing you is probably only doing it as it's company procedure and no doubt sympathises with you but has to do the review because that's his/her job.

You say you have shocks from time to time, I think it's clear you're experiencing a mild anxiety disorder in which worry and stress cause your nervous system to get over sensitive. Anxiety makes the smallest problem seem overwhelming but whatever the symptoms the answer is always the same: stop fighting it, fighting it only causes more stress and tiredness which cause more strange feelings. Instead of fighting it, imagine every muscle in your body relaxing, imagine there's even a muscle in your brain and relax that too. By accepting the strange feelings you create less anxiety and your jangled nerves get a chance to repair themselves. After all, you know all your symptoms are fakes, there's nothing organically wrong so be reassured and stop frightening yourself half to death.

By accepting all your odd feelings and symptoms and not letting original fear turn into second fear and by not constantly fighting your nervous system will recover given time.

There's no reason why you shouldn't keep working, occupation can be therepeutic and you'll find you can still work despite feeling lousy to begin with as many of us do, you're no exception.

So look to your recovery by accepting the tricks your tired mind and anxiety play on you and be confident that you have the power and ability to overcome all.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

That sound like good advice, and the way you describe everything its as if you've known me for yrs. Thanks for your kind words and l shall work on what you've said.

[Beevee in reply to Jeff1943]

Another great post Jeff. Keep spreading the message that acceptance works and made easier through knowledge and understanding of anxiety.

Regards

Beevee

[Jeff1943 in reply to Beevee]

I'll do my best Beevee, we've all been there haven't we usually several times and possibly will again but when we know how to handle sensitisation through experience we can do it again effectively and without bewilderment. What would we do without Doctor Claire Weekes!

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

I must admit Jeff l've copied yr wise words and pasted them onto my notepad on my phone because it helps me to keep reading them. My memory is not good and l need to get it all deep into my brain. Thx again x

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

Timeless, just a couple of quick things, the reason anxiety is worse first thing in the morning is because that's when our levels of cortisol are at the highest, 8a.m. to be exact. Cortisol is a fight or flight hormone and nature thinks we need an extra spurt of it first thing but of course we don't because we don't do fight or flight first thing in the morning. So it just sloshes around in our bodies making us feel anxious and depressed. The substance that counteracts cortisol is called thianine and it's found in green tea. So it's worth investing a quid at Lidl and starting the day with a mug of well brewed green tea. Have it there ready for when you wake up, the earlier you take it the better. I've tried green tea extract tablets and even concentrated thianine tablets but they don't work for me, only the green tea brewed with hot water works. It's worth a try and do persist with it for at least a week before you decide if it's helping you.

What I didn't say in my previous posting (because I say it so often I think I'm boring people) is that the Acceptance method of healing oneself of anxiety disorder is something developed by the late Doctor Claire Weekes way back in the 1960s, she wrote many books on her method right up to her death in the 1990s. She had suffered from anxiety as a young woman herself.

The first book she wrote is called 'Self help with your nerves' by Claire Weekes and you can buy it from Amazon or better still order a used one for 1p. Plus £2.80 postage and it's life changing. It describes her method of recovery in easy to understand terms, what she calls Facing - Accepting - Floating - and Letting time pass. If you do decide to read it you will soon recognise yourself in its pages. Some of the home scenarios are a little dated but that's not important, in the past 50 years her books have brought an end to bewilderment, reassurance and eventual full recovery to hundreds of thousands of people. I recommend it.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

I will try the green tea Jeff. I will get some tomorrow. I have been drinking Camomile tea by the gallon and lve got a real liking for it now. I wondered why mornings were the worst. I hope the worst of the symptoms of coming off venlafaxine will be this week. Ive got to face the doctor tomorrow and explain myself, 😕

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Jeff, lm on day five or six of coming off venlafaxine and l dont regret it. Im still struggling a bit with mild symptoms, plus feeling down sometimes, but being January isnt helping much. I know lm gonna feel better in the long run. I am paying for some counselling next week as l cant wait for NHS, Im so determined to control this depression and anxiety. I appreciate your kind words and any other words you care to give. 😊

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Timeless, I presume you're not coming off the Venlafaxine cold turkey but are tapering it off gradually over a period of time. I think there are two kinds of depression and many people with anxiety get depressed as a reaction to the constant symptoms of anxiety so it's a kind of secondary depression, it comes out of the anxiety and when the nervous system eventually becomes desensitised through acceptance and the anxiety passes then the depression also passes.

So it all comes back to Acceptance, the treatment for anxiety explained and advocated by Dr. Claire Weekes whose book I mentioned before, that book has saved hundreds of thousands from the misery of anxiety and depression by explaining in simple terms why we become sensitised and exactly how to overcome it. I hope all goes well with your coming off the Venlafaxine and that you find and follow the road to recovery.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

I did get off Venlafaxine Jeff. But, the anxiety with depression is getting harder to live with. Im trying to hold back emotions at work and when lm in shops but its so hard. Because l feel so miserable l was thinking of going back on medication but not Venlafaxine. I want something none addictive. Ive been taking Kalms but not sure if theyre working. Just want to be my happy normal self, l guess l miss my husband. He had such a silly slapstick sense of humour and he could always make me laugh. I miss it and him.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

Timeless, if you reach the stage where you really can't function then there is nothing wrong with going to your doctor, explaining that you feel you can't cope and asking for an antidepressant or antianxiety medication but not venlafaxine because you don't have any confidence in it.

In fact that's what I advise you to do. And don't get hung up about getting addicted to presescrition drugs, with the exception of valium/diazepam which can cause addiction after a couple of months other medications are not addictive but you should come off them in ever decreasing amounts when the time comes. And remember that manyantidepressents take about 3 weeks to fully kick in when you start taking them. So don't feel you've failed because you decide to go back on a course of meds - give thanks that you're living in the 21st century when such remedies are available!

However, I do recommend that in the meantime still continue to read that Claire Weekes book on acceptance I mentioned before as it will be a great help when you eventually do come off meds.

Meanwhile I will finish with a joke about addiction: in the 1930s there was an actress called Tallulah Bankhead who, shall we say, over endulged in all of life's pleasures. She once famously said: "This talk about cocaine being addictive is absolute nonsense and I should know - I've been taking it for 15 years!" ☺

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Jeff, l did get a claire weeks book and l have been reading it, l think l would have been better getting an earlier book. I read some advice off the net. Tim Laurence is a good one to read about his experiences. I guess lm finding it difficult living alone. Its a lot harder to get yourself right when you have no partner to take your mind off things. I am fine if lm occupied, but so sooner lm not it all comes back. Although lm finding sympathetic breathing works very well for me although lm having to do it about three times a day. Thanks for your joke, why are men so good at remembering jokes? Its the best thing for snapping you out of sad moods. X

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

Timeless, the passing of your husband was most traumatic and it is only to be expected that it has left its mark on your wellbeing. In time all troubles pass, believe me, and so will yours given time and acceptance. But do consult your doctor for the help of medications if things become intolerable and do so without reservation or any sense of failure. At the moment getting by one day at a time is enough for you to handle, in time you will be able to move on to the next stage of your life. Remember akways you have friends here who understand.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Ive been to docs today abt my stomach pains and feeling unwell, which started after l gave up Venlafaxine. Hv to go to hospital for camera down the throat. Doc says it may not be cancer, which l thought was very reasuring and wondered why she suggested it. Got some medicines for it. I find it a coincidence that l started having this trouble after giving up on Venlafaxine.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

Hi Timeless, that was not very considerate of your doctor to say it "may" not be cancer, I would say it's extremely unlikely specially given that your stomach troubles started when you came off the Venlafaxine regardless of whether that was a physical or nervous reaction. That Claire Weekes says that the stomach is the most sympathetic organ in the body when it comes to reacting to emotional stress and anxiety. I had that camera down the throat procedure about a year ago, I call it the Dynorod Experience, there's nothing to it, it doesn't go down very far and the tube is very thin and flexible. They offered me a tranquilliser before the procedure which I took but if I had to have it again I wouldn't bother with it. I'd had abdominal pain, quite mild, but the procedure found nothing except a bit of inflamation which they biopsied but it was fine. Still have the occasional mild pain in the region of the ascending colon, probably a bit of IBS but I ignore it as I went on to have a ct scan and that found nothing.

So don't worry about the procedure, it's a doddle (not like 30 years ago when the flexible tube was the size of a garden hose!). My view would be not to shun taking an antidepressant ir tranquilliser at the moment and do read that Claire Weekes book 'Self help with your nerves'.

After all your recent trauma it's only to be expected that you react the way you have, you wouldn't be human if you didn't, but with time abd acceptance you will rebuild your health and well being - and don't pay any attention to the bad choice of words of your doctor. This is not cancer it's anxiety disorder. Please let me know how you get on if you're happy to share the information. May God go with you.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Thx so much Jeff. Its good of you to share your experience. Im not worried abt hospital but l was annoyed how the doc (female) couldnt get me out of the surgery quick enough. It was literally minutes. Still trying not to turn to antidepressants as going through withdrawal symptoms in Jan would be for nothing. Its that which has knotted my stomach up, l think. I would rather turn to God, or ahcohol. Have'nt made me mind up yet.....although my stomach hates alcohol too! Looks like God has the upper hand 😀

[Den64 in reply to Hidden]

Hi it's Den. I lost my husband 18 years ago. He too had a comical way of looking at things in life. I miss having him around. But in another way he is partly responsible for the health anxiety I am going through. He went into work and never came home. They found him early the following morning where a security door had shut behind him after he had a major heart attack. Hence why I worry about my heart. I'm now on Propranolol but it is making me so tired. How long goes it take for side affects to subside I wonder.

[Hidden in reply to Jeff1943]

Jeff, l can't real with the anxiety symptoms. Im living on my own now and darren is in prison still suffering anxiety too. Im back on tablets, and l can't cope.

[Jeff1943 in reply to Hidden]

Sorry to hear that Timeless. Nothing wrong with going back on the tablets when things are overwhelming but remember they take a few weeks to kick in. I suggest you ask your doctor for a small prescription of diazepam to see you through until the other medication takes effect. Emphasise to doctor you will only take them as needed and not continuously. And maybe read 'Self help for your nerves' by Claire Weekes no matter how many times youve read it before.

Your son will be o.k. just as my grandson did o.k. and he will come out a better man than went in.

At least you have peace and quiet at home now. Don't let your jobgo, work is a good distraction.

You can cope and you will, everything will turn out fine eventually, you have given your best to everyone. This is just a rough patch caused by your son's departure, you will come to accept this. I shall be thinking of you, PM me anytime but I may take time to get back cause I'm in s country area with an unreliable signal.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Jeff, l have good news. Claire Weekes audio talks are on Youtube. There's about 15 in all, and they are so good. It's good to relax and listen to what shes saying. Darren has one more year at Dovegate, and its affected his mental health quite badly. God knows what he's going to be like when he comes out. I hope you are okay.

[Beevee]

Couldnt agree more Jeff. I also found a website called Anxiety No More a great source of information on my road to recovery. It was created by Paul David who also recovered by practising acceptance. Whilst the late Dr Claire Weekes laid the foundations to my recovery, Paul's website explained things in such a way that helped me to understand Facing, accepting, floating Past, Letting time pass more easily and apply it. To be honest, it wasn't easy at all at first, but practice made perfect.

I'm afraid too many sufferers look for a quick fix to rid themselves of anxiety but relief is usually temporary. For permanent cure, sufferers have to continually pass through the storm until they learn how to cope with the symptoms the right way (accepting and not adding second fear which is the culprit) until they no longer matter. Time is the healer.

Just this evening a friend shared the following quote/poem which I think explains the journey in overcoming anxiety quite nicely.

Chapter One

“I walk down the street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk (pavement).

I fall in.

I am lost... I am helpless.

It isn't my fault.

It takes forever to find a way out.

Chapter Two

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I pretend I don't see it.

I fall in again.

I can't believe I am in the same place.

But, it isn't my fault.

It still takes me a long time to get out.

Chapter Three

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I see it is there.

I still fall in. It's a habit.

My eyes are open.

I know where I am.

It is my fault. I get out immediately.

Chapter Four

I walk down the same street.

There is a deep hole in the sidewalk.

I walk around it.

Final Chapter

I walk down another street."

[Jeff1943 in reply to Beevee]

Nice one, Beevee, I shall certainly have a look at the website you mention. Many thanks.

[Agora1 in reply to Beevee]

Beevee, how true, how true

Thanks, Agora1

[Beevee in reply to Agora1]

Happy New Year Agora1 ❤ Hope all is well with you and your loved ones.

The following is more for the benefit of those who are struggling to get to grips with anxiety.

Recovery is a process and setbacks (where sufferers feel as though they have fallen back down the hole and won't get out) are part of this process. So long as sufferers relax their attitude towards the symptoms (safe in the knowledge that the symptoms are harmless) and learn not to care about them so much, they will walk along that other street and take those setbacks within their stride. Even if they do fall down another hole, they will have built up a wealth of knowledge and experience and tucked it away in their back pocket which will get them out of the hole. The more holes you fall into, the better you become at getting out of them. The better you become, the less you care about falling in which is the key to recovery. Not caring if you have anxiety or not.

The hole I refer to is created by fear and fear alone and if sufferers learn to cope with their anxiety the right way, losing the fear of their symptoms along the way, the sidewalk (we call it a pavement in good old Blighty) will not have any holes to fall into.

Keep walking my friends, keep moving forward and you shall find peace of mind and body.