As I write this someone is mowing a lawn and has been for ages and I really need some peace. I guess that is half the reason for me posting, have put so much mental energy in that this sort of thing is driving me mad, when a normal reaction would be 'the neighbours grass needs cutting and so they are cutting it, bit noisy, oh well never mind'.
Week three of my return to work after my breakdown, and oh boy am I tired. Starting to be able to do some work but at a reduced rate. Anxiety leaves and bouts of depression kick in. I have done so well in many ways and even managed to get out and join a choir, which as I am writing this I really haven't realised how massive it was.
Today at work a really difficult situation presented itself and it started to set me back, at work I am sounding better and people probably don't know how I'll I am and although I don't want a badge it makes it harder. It is taking me such a lot of energy just to get to work and try to manage my illness after two weeks of not being able to function at all.
Sorry for rambling on, just feeling the pressure rising and don't want to go backwards, worried that I am going to push myself too hard too fast and not realise that I am doing it.
Thanks for your support.