Cant sleep Wont sleep.

[Dodo777]

Every time I have an appointment the night before i cant sleep for fear of missing the appointment. Even though its not until 12.30 . I will be up now and probably feel tired about 5 or 6am and then have to fight to stay awake. My chest feels I have a fist in it ssqueezing my heart. I will be so shattered and run down.

I have to see my mental health doctors and nurse or they'll cut my meds down and they know I will panic without them. Lonh story but they got to keep an eye on me because of my past episodes.

Hope you all the best.Good night.

[Agora1]

Dodo, I don't know what the time difference is but I would think you have had the appointment with the doctor by now. It's like that here in the U.S. that if you don't see the mental health doctor periodically, they cut back or won't refill the meds. I know you can't afford to have it taken away from you. Your past episodes must have been severe enough for them to have to keep an eye on you for your safety. Is that feeling in your chest a part of your anxiety? You will no doubt be exhausted when you get back. Take care and try to rest. Going shopping last night was a big accomplishment as well. I don't know if I could have done that knowing I had the doctor the next day.

Hope it went well for you.

[Dodo777 in reply to Agora1]

I hurt others including myself i completely broke down after being so stressed for many years bottled up past abuses worried about my boy at the time because his mother wasn't being a mum and I snapped. If I had a gun they or I would not be here now. I understand people who go on a gun rampage or some because the mind can only take so much punishment.

I didn't know you was American isn't it mad how we can converse over the Pacific so fast. Hope this finds you well.

[Agora1 in reply to Dodo777]

I'm okay except for my credit card number having been stolen. True we can converse all over the world, it's amazing.

You really have been through a lot haven't you? I'm glad you are still here. We are all put on this earth for a reason whether we see it or not at the time. Now you just need to stay safe. Glad you are on the forum for support. Take care Dodo.

[Dodo777 in reply to Agora1]

Sorry to hear about your card details being stolen hope they cath them.

I think I brought alot of my troubles onto myself but looking back I suffered depression from an early age about 9 when I had my first episode saying that I was being molested by my teacher and my old man was stressed after moving all because my mother who moved house constantly even until her death My dad had very bad chest after working in the pits and my mother moved us to a house on top of a very steep hill and my dad had to walk up the trip every single day I remember watching him having to stop every few yards but my mother was so selfish always about het no matter what but my parents went through very bad childhoods being molested and beaten so I cant really blame them. I noticed i have come out with alot but I think it helps to unload thats why I see a mental health nurse She said to me today to pop up any time now instead odf appointments I was absolutely shattered seeing them today because i didn't sleep and my vioce is going.

Have you lost money over the card businesses, hope not. Where to in America do you live if you dont mind me asking. I would love to live in America , Alaska i would love to live So free living off the land. I watch alot of programs about there I know its a hard life but keeps you busy and people seem happier.

[Agora1 in reply to Dodo777]

I live in Chicago. Usually very cold in the winter, but this year has been mild. As for my card, the charges made are being taken care of by Visa. Their fraud department will take care of it and I will be issued a new card.

I don't see how you at 9 years old could have brought troubles on yourself. It's too bad the depression couldn't have been addressed at that young age. It may have helped. My heart broke when you talked about your dad having to climb a steep hill every day. Knowing that your parents went through bad childhoods doesn't excuse them but at least you know where it came from. Very sad. I'm glad the nurse wants to see you more often anytime you need to talk. That's good. I could imagine you are very tired today after not sleeping last night. Hope you will get some rest tonight. I said a prayer for you last night.

[Dodo777 in reply to Agora1]

My mother had bad Mental heath issues . Looking back she could of went to prison for all the things she did. She was so disconnected from reality.

Chicago wow we are having strange weather here in south Wales. Not as cold and raining all the time.

[Agora1 in reply to Dodo777]

Are mental health issues hereditary? I don't know anyone in my family who had anxiety or depression. Just wondering.

[Dodo777 in reply to Agora1]

Agora can you help me ? I signed up with Three to have 5GB a month for £15 but I am getting Alerts saying I owe £60 well I been getting loads of Alerts saying I owe them up to £60 when I go on my final bills page they say all I owe is the £15 I agreed to pay each month. I am so confused and worried because I haven't been online that much.

[Agora1 in reply to Dodo777]

Oh I'm so sorry, I wish I could help you. I don't understand it. It's different here.

Maybe someone from the forum will see it and be able to explain it better. Try not to stress out about it, hopefully someone will come forward.

[Dodo777 in reply to Agora1]

I phoned the Three company and I went over my credit and been hit with extra charges. I didn't realize being online was so expensive. Hope your feeling ok.

[Agora1 in reply to Dodo777]

Not sure if you are online by phone or computer. I'm sorry being online is so expensive. Let me know if you are being charged for incoming messages as well.

I'll make sure I keep it short. I hope this

doesn't mean you will have to give up the forum. Is there any other way around this? Take care of yourself.

[allnew2me in reply to Dodo777]

Now I see. I have had a dongle from three but it was a PAYG one. The credit never lasted at all. Even a GB seemed to disappear very quickly compared to being on regular broadband. Do you have the little desktop pop up thing that appears to connect? Not sure how it does it now. In there used to be a way to check your usage and keep an eye on it. One thing. NEVER leave it connected if you are leaving the computer. It still carries on eating your data xx

[Dodo777 in reply to Agora1]

There is a few in my family from my mothers side.

[Redhots7]

I do same thing , not a fear of oversleeping . If I have appt. just weighs on my mind .

[Dodo777 in reply to Redhots7]

Can wear you down at times.

[Redhots7 in reply to Dodo777]

Cried myself to sleep many many nights. Hang in there !!!!

[Dodo777 in reply to Redhots7]

Thanks I am up again wide awake just cant seem to sleep lately

[Dodo777]

Hi Agora How do I find out if I am paying for incoming because something isn't right I bought an hp laptop and I think to many apps have been stuck on all feeding off my Gbs. I wont stop coming o here it helps me to get grounded.

[allnew2me in reply to Dodo777]

What sort of usage limit do you have? Are you tied into a contract? Have you spoken to your company and asked them to analyse your usage? I know from when I was with BT they did this but I'm not sure about others. I'm with sky now and no idea if they do it. I worried too much with having a limit once the kids were online with gadgets it made my hair curl at the thought of going over. There are so many companies out there you can compare with if you aren't in a contract still. I'm counting down till mine ends in a couple months it's sooooo slow but I can't really complain as it was free and unlimited for 12 months.

Sorry lots of questions I know xx