Not feeling myself

Hi everyone.

My name is Tony and rencently broke up with my partner of just over 2 years. We have a little girl together and she has a son from a previous relationship who i have also been caring for since he was born. (His dad wasnt interested). Due to this split i am currently not eating and only getting a few hours sleep a night. Im physically and mentally exhausted and just not myself at all. Another part of me feeling awful is that she is on the tenancy to where we live and i now have 1 week to find somewhere else to live that is suitable for my daughter and step son to come and stay with me at weekends and just somewhere for me to live at all. I feel horrible that i will not be able to provide a second home to my kids and due to me losing my job i cannot afford anywhere. I have asked for help from the council but i have to find a property that is £290 pcm which is impossible! Im just comletely lost and not sure what to do anymore.

Thankyou for reading.

5 Replies

  • Hello

    I am not surprised you are not feeling yourself it sounds like you are going through an awful lot

    When we go through a break up it is quiet normal to feel as you do and it feels it will never pass but it does it takes time it is a bit like a bereavement we have lost someone we love and we have to go through the process of adapting to this , feels awful while we are I know but also know that you will not feel like this forever

    If you cannot find any where to live and you are a joint tenant and it would mean you been on the streets then I think you will have to stay where you are as difficult as that may be but you need a roof over your head to, not sure why there has to be this deadline of you moving out if you cannot find any where to go , again I know it must be difficult been under the same roof but you need that roof !

    Have you spoken to the Citizens Advice in your area .....If not I really would go & make an appointment they are really good and should be able to offer you support

    Also there is Shelter

    I have popped the Link on for you to have a look at if you contact them they also may be able to help you

    Have you been and spoken to your Doctor ?

    If you really feel you are not coping at all with this I would , they could also offer you some support

    It maybe that you may have to accept just a one bedroom place for now , I know not ideal but better than no accommodation you could still see your Children but maybe have to skip having them over night which please do not blame yourself for , these things happen in life and all we can do is the best we can but blaming ourselves is not going to help

    Sounds like you are a good Dad and children above everything else need to know they are loved and I am sure you can do that no matter where you are living :-)

    Good Luck x

  • Thank you. Im not a joint tenant only my ex partner is on the tenancy and she has given me one week to find somewhere. I will go to citizens advice in the morning. I have also looked into getting shared housing with 1 bedroom but i cant even afford that with the council. I will also check shelter and maybe book a doctors appointment in the morning. Thank you for the help.

  • Hello

    Sorry I misread that about the joint tenant thing but try those things tomorrow as well if you can get your Doctor to back you up what all this is doing to you

    Have you got a friend or relative you could stop with if the worse came to the worse and I really would hope that as long as you are trying your ex won't put you out on the street till you get somewhere

    Let us know how it goes x

  • so sorry you are going through all this, good luck and hope you find some where to live soon then you will feel a lot better x

  • Hi Tony

    I have gone through something very similar in recent months and it has been tough but the fog is starting to lift.

    I agree with the person above who said you are putting the kids first which is great but you need to take care of you also.

    I know exactly how you feel and it is awful but you will get there. Keep talking here - only too glad to help you with anything.

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