please help cant stop crying

Hi.Im really struggling at my new job as a nursery assistant so much I keep coming home crying and feeling stressed.Im not qualified in childcare and have extremely bad anxiety and feel my dyspraxia is affecting me.I feel very unsure of what I'm doing all.the time and feel like quitting.I keep making stupid mistakes like yesterday they asked me to go and buy a four pint of milk I thought they said full pint so I brought the wrong size.When the children are doing things outside I struggle with common sense for example rolling up the children sleeves when they play in water .I also can't tye shoelaces and struggle with confidence.I'm struggling so much and have got a doctors appointment booked for my anxiety.I'm crying my eyes out as typing this. I got told last week they thought I was doing well so my hours have increased.they don't know I have dyspraxia as I didn't realise it affected me and the jobs making me very unhappy. I constantly am paranoid the staff are speaking abot how rubbish I am.doing and feel im not good and I don't fit in.i feel like I should quit but than I've let them down and also won't have any money please help thank you.Todayi have woken up crying constantly feel in such a dark place

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  • stop giving yourself such a hard time

    my 30 yr old son has dyspriaxia so i know some of the issues it brings......i hate to say this honey but perhaps that not the right job for you....you have a lot of responsibility there and have young lives to watch over no wonder its stressing you out

    have a think about whats best for you maybe a different direction....have a chat to the college counselor

  • Thank you for your reply have woken up crying today and not sure what the next steps are.ive been unemployed for a while although did a work placement at a voluntary organisation and loved it a lot.it was helping clients use computers.I feel my health I really bad .only thing i if I quit I might not be able to get jsa

  • ps

    have a look on helpguide.org its full of information and support

  • i relate to a lot of the feelings you are expressing. sad to hear your feeling so bad, if you want to talk one on one drop me a message anytime :) xxx

  • Thank you so much ir drop you a message x

  • hi hun, thanks and well done for sharing how you feel, you put it so clearly. I am sorry you feel so low. I've put some thoughts down, I hope some may help.

    1)maybe you can ask to stay on the lesser hours while you settle in.

    2) talk to the person in charge about your dispraxia, maybe print out & take a short leaflet in about it.

    3) you can't be doing that bad or they wouldn't offer you more hours.

    4) everyone has to learn what to do. I was a Nursery Nurse and, believe me, everyone slips up, on things.

    wet sleeves, clothing, shoes - if it can get wet, then it can & does! someone should have explained it to you first, so it's their mistake, not yours.

    5) if you can't do something, ask for help. as for shoelaces - this is now a generation who has never had to thanks to velcro! my friend's 24 year old son only recently learned as he'd got "posh shoes" (not trainers) for a wedding.

    Please try not to let it upset you. Go in with a smile, ask what they'd like you to do and be helpful. the children will be glad to be with you.

    maybe buy a little notepad and ask about or notice the routine. jot a few useful bits of info e.g. do they have set story times, what happens at tidy-up times, toilet time, etc..

    a good idea is to note how they set a room up on different days. paint/sand/water ( :) ) jigsaws, condtruction toys, creative.

    then, when you feel confident, offer to help set up.

    We all had to learn, if you make a mistake, it's all part of learning. It's not failing, you just need more practice and to have it explained again, there is so much to take in, no-one can learn everything first go.

    Give it a little time if you can. try to maybe just stay and see how the next ten minutes go, if that's ok, the next ten. build on that, thirty mins, an hour, to the next break. You may find that you got through a morning, the whole day. this way you haven't got that awful feeling of "I've got 6 hours and 27 minutes before I can leave!"

    It can be hard work and very tiring but - the lovely thing about working with children is no ten minutes are ever the same; a child's smile or a little hand that slips intlo your hand; or the surprise and sheer joy on their face when they learn do something are so rewarding and even more if you helped them :)

    If you do decide to leave, let them know. and don't think you've failed and let anyone down. you've just learned that it's not for you and now you can look for something that is :)

    Better to do something you like, than being unhappy because you feel you should stay.

    Please let me know how you go on.

    sending you a hug,

    hamble :)

  • just wanted to ask how did today go?

  • Hi it went ok thanks told manager and other staff but the doctor wasn't very nice just laughed thank you

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