A little set back that has set my anxiety off..... any advice?

I have been doing really well recently was thinking about getting back to work, hard for me cos im self employed, i am a beauty therapist but last year I had a website for hats. Since ive been unable to work, I stripped the website down but didnt want to delete it as it takes time to resume. I havent done any work obv in this time off, for a couple of months I couldnt go out n im only now feeling like I can go out, n Push myself to have coffees as a step to get back to work.

Someone called for a hat weds n I thought what do I do..... so I thhiought this is a test to see if I can do it.. anyway nothing came of it n now I have had a letter to say im having a visit to see if my circumstances have changed.... its thurs n my anxiety is sky high again ....... any advis

13 Replies

  • Hi Anne

    It inevitably happens just when we are feeling we can cope some thing crops up out of the blue. DWP have a bad habit of upsetting people try not to worry about their visit. I hope you are able to go back to work.

    Take care Kenny xxxxx

  • Thank you for your reply and reassurance, I havent done owt wrong other than take a call..... xx

  • Hi anne

    I am sorry they are pestering you , I know it will be my turn soon & last time it made me so ill I had quite a big set back to be honest !!!

    Now I am of an honest nature always have been & still am but the advice I was given & I follow when dealing with these people does slightly go against my principles but I am afraid they leave you with no choice

    The first thing to remember is your situation has not got any better & you have all the medical evidence to back that up , if you can get anything together to support this it is always good

    This is the bit I really didn't want to do but that is I was strongly advice to never say "sometimes"

    Basically always answer the questions based on your worse days & not the odd few days that are better , so eliminating the "sometimes" reply at all times as they see that as an always !!!

    Be polite but don't let them make you believe they are your friend as they can get you talking & hope you will slip up

    So to put it simply , be honest but base your answers on your worse days only !

    Don't worry about the hat thing I am sure the call wasn't a test just a coincidence you got the letter after & our anxiety making us paranoid !




  • Thank you so much for the advice.... It is a set back..... I did take a call, cos I want to get bsck to work!

    ultimately...... N how do I know I can if I dont try?? But I havent worked or made any money..... I wish I could, I hate being on benefits..... as we all do!I

    Anyway thank you so much xxx

  • I know anne it is frustrating , don't worry though you wont be on benefits for ever but while you are not fit for work you have as much right as anyone else to receive this support

    Let us know how you get on


  • I will .... thank you.... i do feel a little calmer xx ;-) xx

  • Hi ker, well sounds to me like your circumstances haven't changed so you've got nothing to worry about youve done nothing wrong :) good for you going out for coffee that's brill :)

    Mimii xx

  • Thank you xx

  • I know exactly how you are feeling. I am also self employed and have had to cut back on how many jobs I do. It's effecting my job, my whole life. It's a scary thing but we will beat it.

  • Thank you... I was starting to feel better..... hope you feel better soon too ;-)

  • Oh Anne, what a shame you are such a talented lady. I am of pension age now, so thankfully don't have those dreaded visits. Unfortunately you have to be on the same wave length as those people, and WhyWhy has given you some good advice. Good on you for taking the phone call, you have nothing to be afraid of. You are not well, and I know it's awful having to rely on benefits, but you know you have got better, so accept what benefit they are giving you and give yourself time to feel better. Your circumstances haven't changed. Your hats are beautiful, and one day you will be a successful business lady again. xxxEunice

  • Thank you so much fir your kind words n also words of encouragement!!

    I hope you are ok!!


  • Anytime Anne, we are all here to help one another.

    I am fine thank you, I have my moments, but enjoying life at the moment, taking each day as it comes.

    Take care, Eunicex

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