Hi all its been a while x im on for a rant cos im, having a bad day, i have basically spent the entire day in tears with every ache and pain i experience being my doomsday approach, if only death was easy but i want to live and be a good mum and wife, it scares me senseless that my doom is approaching and i have tried in every way shape and form to be positive and not think worst case scenario but its impossible. I started having cbt therapy over the phone a few month back, which stopped after 4 sessions due to next stage then i had 4 weekly visits from someone coming to my home to do the cbt therapy and all i got was lectures for half hour on positive thinking and core beliefs and if u can change them u can change ur world, it was working i felt great, now thats finished and its stage 3 16 weeks of intense cbt which may not start for a few weeks and boom back to to earth and down n out, everyone i know tells me im to paranoid n all my health checks should tell me so but ive never had any check for anything, i dont even have any meds , i was only on beta blockers but im not allowed them anymore, so its me on my own, and im stuck again. I cannot even go to my doctors cos im to scared to leave my home. thanks for puttin up with my rants x
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