Started to feel a lot better and felt like I was making a slow recovery but then new year happened. My night started off being at my mom and dad's friends party, my boyfriend was at his moms house (I didn't go because we don't get along), my dad gave me an ultimatum, he said that i can only move back home if I end my relationship with my boyfriend and if I didn't then I can't move back home, reason for this is because my dad thinks he's controlling and he was annoyed because my boyfriend left me to go home on my own on Christmas night. I was obviously upset so I ended up leaving because me and my dad had a little disagreement. When I got outside of my boyfriends moms my boyfriends sister (Sandra) was getting a taxi home with her partner (mark) and my boyfriends mom said why don't you and keyleigh jump in the taxi, so we did. Then mark said lets go to Anthony's.. (Anthony Is my boyfriends brother and he previously made a pass at me and there was a huge uprawr in the family and nobody believed me so I don't go anywhere near him now if I can help it) I turned round to mark and said I weren't going to Anthony's and he started arguing with me about it in the taxi. I kept telling him that I weren't going to Anthony's and then things got abit much and he shoved me, I reacted and shoved him back, then he got out of the car and opened up my door, dragged me out by my hair onto the floor and was saying I'm lucky I am who I am otherwise he would have done a lot more. I've a cut on my knee and hand and my fingers very badly bruised. In the meantime all my boyfriend did was say why did you do that to my girlfriend. I got up and walked off and my boyfriend didn't follow me so I was walking round on my own at about 3 in the morning. Luckily I have a great friend and she came to get me in a taxi, and I stayed round her house. In the morning I went to get some stuff from my flat and I've moved back into my moms, my boyfriends telling me that he loves me and that he feels really low, but to be honest I've never felt this low in my life, I don't know what to do, I'm doubting that it's ever going to get better and I'm scared of feeling like this it's horrible I just want to be me again and smile like I used to! I don't know what to do about my boyfriend because I love him so much and not being with him is making everything so hard but if I go and see him my parents will really disagree and then everything will be worse. I just don't know what to do and have never felt this lonely and in despair in my life, thanks to anyone who replies xx
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