Not health related but need advice x

I Have a annoying neighbour, I have tried to get along with her but I cannot, She is basically a bragger and thinks shes better than everyone, when your ill she has it bigger and better. I have done all I can for her and me to be good friends but I have wasted my time, her house is a clone of mine, her personality is a clone of mine, she even has anxiety she thinks but she can go on buses and taxis to shopping trips and be out for hours with no bearing.

Anyway we basically got to know each other when i moved in next door to her, 8 year back, and when i had my 7 year old son, 5 month later hers followed, when my 5 year old came along i kept it secret until i was around 6 month and 7 month later hers followed. This means that they go to the local school together and are in each others classes, so we try our best to be civil to her me and the hubby but its really

hard.

Now after all this the prob is my son has had health problems meaning all his lymph glands are removed in his neck major surgery and he hates his neck being touched due to this. And this womans kid has started a campaign to pull his clothes and try to strangle him daily. I've told her and sort of losing it and hitting her she is telling me its not true. My son also has dyspraxia so doesn't understand some things and her latest is hers has adhd so its not his fault this is a lie unless you can be diagnosed in a week!! We have the teachers monitoring it but he dos it when they are in the toilets etc x what would you do???

6 Replies

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  • Oh dear donver

    Well , I dont mix with my neighbours , makes me sound unsociable , but I am not , I learnt years ago , its best to be polite & leave it at that , as if things go wrong , it can be to close to deal with & as you have realized there is no getting away

    Did you say she was moving , is that still going to happen , I do hope so , this would solve a lot of the problem

    Now over the years , I have had people copy what I do etc , & once someone told me to take it as a compliment as obviously I must have good taste for them to want to

    It did help me to think this way & to be honest , they cant keep up for ever as they are your thoughts & ideas , it gets better

    As for the children been near to each other in ages , lets hope thats just a coincidence or its rather over the top & that would make me feel weird if they were going to that extreme

    Now not sure if I read your post right , but you said you have told her about what her son is doing , did you say you hit her or have I miss read that bit :D

    Have you told the teachers , this is happening in the toilets etc , they should have something to put into place

    I can say if you feel your son needs more help & this child is been a pain with him , if you put it in writing to the school , rather than just verbally telling them , they have to be seen to be doing more , as anything they get in writing from a parent , has to go & stay on the files & then when off stead do their rounds they have to be able to say what & how they resolved the issue if they see it , so when you put it in writing they tend to sit up & listen more , that might be one tip your neighbour doesnt no , so get a letter written , dont let on & send it to the head

    Love

    whywhy

    xxx

  • Hi whyhwy, to be honest me and the hubby don't have many friends as a couple he moved here to be with me from down south so we thought at first it would be nice to have another couple to be social with. Wrong . She is younger than me but not by a lot, but she comes across as very bullish and nasty to others and so does not have fiends as such herself But your totally right in the respect that it was to close to have good friends. Im hoping she is moving soon , she said she is but wasn't sure if thats because i said i was lol.

    The kids I think maybe the first was coincidence but the second nope. When I told her i was expecting she didn't seem happy and soon after pregnant. It also happened on the night of my wedding reception lol.

    I have never hit her, i meant short of hitting her lol x i'm a coward don't like violence and even though i say there are exceptions do not think i would.

    I don't think her copying gets to me anymore as tbh i'm that weird with my taste i often wonder why people would want to, so i stopped telling her what i was doing and stopped letting her come round and now i know she cannot:)

    I never thought of putting it in writing maybe this is the step I need to take, as I don't want him to get to the point where he refuses to go to school. He has come a long way and his progress should not be halted by people like that. She isn't well liked at the school and already has got letters of complaint against her son don't know if these will carry over to the kids and help my case. Oh this is where it is so annoying having housebound anxiety. If I was getting out Id go sort it myself but the hubby more laid back. xx Thanks for you reply xx Donver

  • If she has already got complaints about her etc , you need to put everything in writing , how its affecting your son & even you

    You can put a stamp on it & get hubby or maybe ask hubby to put it in the post box , they will listen , but send it to the head of the school & not the teacher , let me no if you do & you get a better result :)

    xxx

  • I will do whywhy x its a church of england school to so they have more checks than some, the complaints are because she refuses to do the kids homework with them and is nasty to the teachers x My hub said he will help me sort it tomorrow xx will let you know xx

  • Hi Donver, how awful. Its one thing to copy you but when someone brings the kids into it i can imagine its almost impossible to rise above it.

    How sad for this woman that her life is an imitation of someone elses, she must have zero self worth and is probably either very unhappy in her own life or else very jealous of yours. Im no help at all with the schools side of things, i ve no kids so im not in the loop with that at all. As for your copycat neighbour i would totally blank her if at all possible, tell her nothing of your life or your sons, she sounds like a leech, feeding off whats going on with you!

    It s soo awkward with her being your neighbour, try not to get too sucked in though or it ll start getting to you. Incidentally if you do hit her i ll want to hear all about it lol!

    xxx

  • Hi and ty looking glass x It seems people will use anything to get at some people. But while i don't want to say im better than her i know i am x if that makes sense lol x

    What i never got about her copying is she is a goth and quite dark and morbid and im more shabby chic and quirky and yet the same ornaments and such are shared, never knew a willow tree was a gothic ornament lol x I have been talking less and less to her and hoping one day she just goes away, but she is so annoying and can wind me up by looking x I will probably feel the need to brag if i even got the confidence to have a go at her never mind whack her one lol x Although she is one of these who outs her dogs in the garden at 8am and they stay there till like 1am next morning barking all day x so if she not careful it may be coming lol xx Donver x

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