Reallity has kicked in

[celest]

Omg the reality has kicked in and im crawling in my owm skin.

Ive recently qiit the job on my wishlist, it was im a new local store, I only managed 3 months, my boss was a bit of a meanie, Im realising that I should of rode thr the wave, anf theres nothing I can do to get it back.cos it would havebeen easier than having to look for work again.

im so angry with myself, cos I never wanted to be in this situation ever again.

this is my second time in a year anf I can't face all of the job hunting all over again, ive lookef on jobsites and it just emphasis my skin crawling feeling at what ive done.

its causing a rift between me and my family cos they think that I dont want to work when I do.

I cant belive that ive blown my wish list and cant do a thimg to get it back.

I already know that job hunting is so hard and haven't a clue what to do next . I was so lucky and couldn't see it until its too late. Im driving my hubby crazy as we have been at this for just over a year. ! He just wants me back.

before all of this I had a steady job for 12 years, in which I quit after my boss decided to make life hard for me, its been down hill ever since,

Help and advice needed and a majic wand.

cant belirve what ive done again!

I want my life back.

Many thanks guys

celest xx

[Hidden]

Oh celest

The job thing , it really is getting to you hun

I no this is a major problem for you , I wish I could do or say more to help

Your hubby didnt he suggest you take a break ?

I really think it would help so much if you could take some time out for a while , rest your mind & get in a better place where you can deal with this if you could afford to do so

Sometimes , we need to take a step back for a while , regroup our thoughts & then we are able to cope better

Please try not to beat yourself up , as this will add extra pressure & you have nothing to feel bad about , anxiety affects us all in different ways

I do hope you will be kind to yourself & take that time out if you can

Love

whywhy

xxx

[celest in reply to Hidden]

Thanks why why, I know what you say, still struggling though. I will need to get back into work, my problem is that ive burnt all my bridges and have ran out of places go, cos while I was working i still was applying for jobs. My support network has gone cos there used to be someone at the library to help. The whole thing of it all , makes me sweat.

I cant believe that I quit something that was on my own doorstep.

Ive got too much time to think now, and don't know how to fill ithow to fil

Thanks fo your support why why.

hugs c xx

your always there thanks.

[Hidden in reply to celest]

Oh celest

I do feel for you , I can always read how much you beat yourself up over this & so wish i could convince you not to

There will be some more bridges hun , I no we can burn them sometimes , but we can build them as well & you will do

Is there any other kind of support out there , I dont work , so not sure on this one , but there must be more than the library ?

I no you cant believe what you have done , but its happened now & you will move forward , next job you get & you will , keep coming on here if you feel you want to quit & we will try & help you , a day at a time , maybe with our support it might work

Same here to much time to think is one of the worse things possible for me to have

I no you are at home , & i am used to that , but I can keep myself so busy , I dont always have enough hours in the day !

I am not saying your house needs cleaning , but what about cupboards maybe that need sorting out , windows might need cleaning , make a cake , are there jobs that need doing that you dont always have time to do , make a list maybe & take this time to do them , as the more you can keep occupied the better

Things will sort out , we all make mistakes , because we are human , anxiety makes us give ourselves a tough time over it though & then that causes more anxiety & for me I make even more mistakes when I am anxious

Keep talking , I no you will get there

xxx

[celest in reply to Hidden]

Thank you whywhy, ive been for a walk with my friend, she was talking about an outing at Christmas, inside it made me cringe, cos Im not working I don't feel that I can p

Plan anything without feeling guilty about money

Before when I was working we used to do many things andnow i don't feel I can p

l. Plan anything. The walk was good though. Thamks again. C.xx

[Hidden in reply to celest]

Christmas is a while away yet , you never no things may be better by then

I am glad you got out & have enjoyed your walk & chat with your friend

Well done hun

xxx

[Debbie369]

I agree with the last reply, try to give yourself a break, cut yourself some slack. We are all better than we think we are it's just part of the condition that keeps us feeling useless tell yourself you ARE BETTER! Than this and will beat it in time xx

[Cookster99]

Hiya Celest, I love that name,

I quit a job i was in for 11 yrs and thought at the time, well a week after, OMG, what have i done but My boss made my life hell and the stress was doing me no good. I reflect now and have come to the conclusion that i would be better off self employed.

Do you have a talent or hobby that could be a potential cottage industry for you?

I am sure you OH will support you in whatever you do, so be positive, i know how hard that is but with time you will get there hun.

All the best, Love Cookie xxx

[celest in reply to Cookster99]

Hiya cookster,

it made me smile about you liking my name.

How are you doing.

Im really struggling with what I have to do next, that's the job hunting, after going through it once, I'm finding it all very daunting. That's the thing that makes me feel angry at myself, I keep asking myself why didn't I see all of this, after all I should have had hindsight after the first time it happened

I just feel that I should of seen it coming, it's like it was someone else and I didn't look into what follows afterwards. Im trying really hard to not think about it but it's a massive thing to me at the moment.

I just don't understand, cos this wasn't in the plan.

you see I left for a cleaning job in a pub but deep down when I hande my notice in I knew I couldn't do it and had second thoughts from the minute I handed in my notice.

The plan wasnt to be of work

I haven't a clue where to go next.

How are you finding being se

Self employed, thats not an option for me.

Good luck with your own venture.

Thanks for the support. Xc

[stde]

Sometimes we can quit when people are putting us under stress, or we don,t like the people or person we have to work with.........there is nothing wrong with this (although it is sometimes better in a job looking for a job)....

But people are not all the same ,this is life.and we might find no matter what job we are in we will not like everyone and maybe not everyone may like us.......but no matter what we do and where we are, this is life.

The only thing that really matters is peace and contentment and sometimes we have to look within to find that we are a good person and others opinions don,t matter........and sometimes even our opinions don,t really matter either.

Wish you well on your journey.x

[celest in reply to stde]

Thanks stde, I know what you say is true, but its was hard to see at the time, then when the blinkers are pulled back, it makes me angry with myself, to see I was hasty.

I really hope that I can learn from it. Its very painful.

The stupid things is that I did the stress class and it told you all of the thing's to do and i forgot to use it.

My problem is now that I need support updating my cv to help me on my way.

Still in disbelief at what ive done, and haven't a clue where to go next.

Thanks for your support.

Cxx

[celest]

Thanks everyone for all the support. Xc