I just feel lost......

Feel really crap today............ the suns shining and its a lovely day, but I just feel empty........... I hate feeling like this and should be grateful to be here............

I just feel lost.............why do I always go through the self anialiation (??) when I split up with someone, I know Ive done the right thing in that I couldnt live in that situation with his mother and he has proved what a wet blanket he is not sticking up for me or believing what his mother is........

But after all the abuse Ive had off his family, I start thinking is it me??

And its horrible not knowing what to do.............. I know I'll get over it, i always do, but I hate feeling like this.........

I gave up my job and lifestyle to be up in his area and I have to start all over again and its so hard.......

And I worried about him cos Id finished with him, I really worried about him and felt guilty , and I thought he must be really bad if his family are giving me all this crap... after all I havent run off with anyone, Ive merely said I cant move there , can you move here.....

And then hes back on the dating site,,,,,,,,,,,,,, N i feel shit, and angry, there was me worruying about him and hes quite happily back dating.............

I cant really even think about it.........ive put my profile back on, merely being childish and to piss them off...but in reality I just cant face it........

Anyway folks sorry for droning on again about my break up, but i needed to get it off my chest.......

xxx

[Hidden]

Hey Anne sorry to hear you having a bad day today. As you know we are in very similar situations. I'm going through the same thing today not really feeling great and I've been analysing everything for the last few days. It's crap the way we are both feeling

I'm here if you just need to chat just PM me. Hope your move improves.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Hi will,

Sorry you to are not feeling great...

I mention in my response to Kerry, us females tend to be romantics......some of you guys do to and keep hoping something can change things , didn't want to sound like its just us that are hurt in a breakup guys are too...

Hope your day improves,

At least it's sunny.....I'm still packing , hahahaah I should have booked 2 weeks away the stuff I've got

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Nah don't worry I didn't think you meant that.

Can't believe your still packinging lol.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Oh yes, everything but the kitchen sink....I was wondering if I intend to come back I'm taking so much...well I guess the world is my Lobster (I know it should be oyster but I always say lobster haha) I could go anywhere right now and that's a fab feeling too...I can just do as I please...hmmmmmmmm

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

thanks Will............. I feel very tearful today............ thats prob a good thing, Ive not really cryed.........

Im sure we'll feel better soon!!

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Your welcome.

I'm not feeling great today. I'm just feeling alone again missing her a lot today more than I have for a few days. Hopefully tomorrow will be easier as I'll be kept busy.

Really do hope your mood gets better today.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I think its worse when you havent anything to occupy your mind, vicious circle really,,,, I cant get motivated to do anytrhing and then sit dwelling.....

Anyway Im here for you too Will if you need to chat x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Have a good cry then treat yourself haha..it will take time, it doesn't happen overnight , we are impatient we are we want the pain to go NOW haha xxxxx

[Hidden]

Morning

Firstly don't feel bad about venting on here, that is just what it's for....I understand how you feel because I too feel bad when I do it...but the folks on here are lovely. To be honest it's kinda helpful when someone vents because responding takes your mind off your own crap for a while :)....

I don't need to tell you that you will get over this because I know you know that, and right now in the moment it doesn't help..you feel like your heart has been ripped apart...nothing anyone says can take that empty feeling away...but rest assured my friend it will go..and you will find happiness out there, for now it's about YOU..you are doing all the right things, your weekend away is good it's a distraction and what you need are distractions whenever you can cope with them.....at times you will feel crap when you are having your adventures but don't give up.....

We all do silly things when we split up with someone, it doesn't matter that you broke off with him it's painful....once you fully set your mind to the fact that this relationship is over, it will help, us females tend to be romantics and continue for some time to think ..maybe if...and what if....but you know no matter what you cannot take this on his terms,,so it's over, harsh I know but facts....

I truly feel for you right now but smile to think of your future..

Each day is different and I maintain the mornings are worse, and because the day has started crap it doesn't mean it has to continue that way,,remember that!

All good wishes for you..

Here if you need me

Xxxxxxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Thanks Sue.............. this really helps............... I just felt so lonely.......... Im not on my own, I have my bro and partner, and my mum, but I just feel lost.........

YOur words makes sense and it helps so thanks

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I think youre totally right in the 'accepting the relationship is over'..... I think in my head I knew it was, but in my heart didnt....... N was romantising that he would say ok I'll move to you........... as I believe if you love someone, then you try....... As I tried to move to his.........

But now I know its over and I have to accept that, grieve and move on!!

Your words have helped me understand that so thanks

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Was worried I sounded harsh, but I've done the same, said its over but not fully believed it so it took much longer to move on...it's sooooo hard and I know you know in your mind, but you will never accept his terms, even to get rid of the pain...sometimes I've thought I will try it their way just to feel better and get rid of the knot in my stomach and the ache to be happy....but when I did that...just the once..it was 10 times worse......I resented him so much...and when we did split eventually I felt even worse for wasting time....time is precious..

Love sue xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I'm feeling the same in my head I know it's over, but my heart keeps convincing me I can change things or that she'll suddenly realise that she's made a mistake. I don't know I keep thinking maybe I should just try and force the issue by starting to date again, but I know I'm not ready even if it is just making new friends. It also wouldn't be fair to anybody involved if I was to do this.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I know Im not ready to date, Ive put my profile on but really just to piss them off...... childish I know......... but thats how I feel...........

x

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I was very tempted to do the same, but the way I feel a the mo I'd probably end up messaging her on it just to see if we can wok things out which is mental so I've resisted for now. It's been hard, but I still do hope that once this grieving period is over we can be friends.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

You will know when your ready Will, at this stage if you see someone you tend to compare as well, try not to do that I did that a lot, it's fatal , we have to remember everyone is very different, we know it, but don't always put it into practise.....it will happen......exciting times ahead

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yeah I'm doing that the comparing thing and I'll probably be doing that for a while sadly.

Fingers crossed that I got some exciting times come. It feels like my luck has been bloody aweful lately.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yeah I did the comparing thing quite a bit...soon died off when I met someone I liked though..... well it can't get any worse Will, can only get better.....just been playing michael buble it's a beautiful day...gosh hope I stay feeling like this it's like a weight has been lifted off your shoulders when you feel a bit better and can smile.....hope it lasts....

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

It's good to hear your feeling so good. I'll keep everything crossed for you that your mood stays this way.

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I love that song and the lyrics are fab.... Ive just bought myself the paloma faith cd, so cheered up a bit having a drive out.... and going with my bro to his horse later, so that will be better xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yay that's good , yeah love the song made me feel nice....I'm trying so far it's working...yes, go for it go out even just for a couple of hrs it defo helps....listen to me . The one who stays in her bedroom for days and don't listen to no one....haha...I'm just trying to make the most of this...xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Im so chuffed for you and its a sign that things can go back to normal!!

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

It is a fookin lonely place to be no doubt about it.....truly it's like grieving someone who has died, but worse because they are still around but not with you......xxx

[Hidden]

Dare I say it without people thinking I'm crazy but at one stage I actually wished my partner was dead, because it would be easier bloody hell....and now twenty years on I don't know what I ever saw in him, thank the gods my wish didn't come true...I am not religious but I hope god forgave me...Such a terrible thing to think...but you are in so much pain............you just want anything to make it go. Xxxx

[Hidden]

Nah it wasnt harsh at all...... its good to hear that and I know its true.........

Youre right too and I did even think 'can I put up with them?' to alleviate this horrible life I have at the min...... But I know I couldnt..... and yeah it would be worse.............. I want to be with someone who will compromise for me, not just me comprmising for them............

Cos basically thats what it is......... as long as I go along with what him and his mother want, they happily let me in their circle, but when I say , actually no, Im not doing that.... well they dont like that....... well bollocks!!

You know what he put on his profile header........'the average woman would rather have beauty than brains, cos the average man can see better than he can think!'.............. Ah sorry, I forgot us women are only here for mens amusement.............!! What fookin era does he think hes living in!!

Thanks again Sue, have you got packed then??

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

His profile header is daft !! Haha....it will put women off haha..anyway who cares it's about you now...feels lonely even with people around I know that....

Packing is therapeutic, bit I need to STOP hahahahaahaha...

I'm obsessed packing away....

Start thinking about what your taking with you for the weekend...lets have a packing competition hahaha xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

oops.... I bette do some washing!! Im such a minger sometimes!!

xx

[Cookster99]

Hi Anne,

Your on an emotional rollercoaster at the moment aren't you, and it's to be expected. You will grieve for your past and the person you used to be and in time it does become easier.

Don't apologise for how you are feeling, we are here for you and will listen till the cows come home lol, I bet he hasn't put anything about his over protective mother on the site, just think about his next girlfriends reaction when she comes face to face with that bit of bad news lol xxx keep your chin up mate, you'll get there, we all will in the end

[Hidden in reply to Cookster99]

thanks Luv...........I might just go get pissed this weekend!!

How are you doing mrs??

xx

[Cookster99 in reply to Hidden]

Now now,

We both know getting pissed can only lead to us being an emotional mess lol

You don't want to wake up in the morning thinking, oh god what have I done, who have I upset and the list goes on lol

I'm as ok as ok can be for now, a bit like you I'm up and down all at once and trying to take it an hour at a time xxx

[Hidden in reply to Cookster99]

yeah I know ............ i wont really.....Im just pretending to be wreckless......

xx

[Hidden]

OK all together that song from South Pacific

IM GOING TO WASH THAT MAN RIGHT OUT OF MY HAIR & SEND HIM ON HIS WAY

As loud as you can , keep going , singing with you

Will love you will have to sing IM going to wash that girl

xxxxxxxxxxxxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

You made me smile whywhy..... thank you.......

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

I hope you are singing , cos I still am

You washed him out yet

xxxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Im singing................. xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Yes I can hear , think you did an A flat there , instead of a C

Carry on , keep washing

xxx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

xx

[Cookster99 in reply to Hidden]

Lol, you lot are barmy, I'm doing sing if your glad to be gay lol xxx

[Hidden in reply to Cookster99]

xx

[Pickle165]

hi anne, i seem to always feel alone. some days are better than others but remember we are all here for you. xxxxx

[Hidden in reply to Pickle165]

thank you xx

[Hidden]

Aw big hugs to you. Wouldnt it be nice to be able to skip the pain of a breakup and move on without all the inbetween rubbish................life would be so much easier. Just keep remembering the crap parts when you feel down.. Shout if you need anything. xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

That's a good point...we always think of the good things when we split up with someone.....think about all the things that annoyed you ?...and most definitely his mum hahaha. Xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

Ive made a list on my phone and I look at it when Im feeling crap.......... Pros and cons...........

the Cons far outway the Pros!!

xx

[Hidden in reply to Hidden]

EXACTLY !

Remember that , they so do !

Now

Im going to wash that man right out of my hair

One thing , you should have clean hair by the end of this

xx

[tinks2003]

I have spent two days in bed this week even though the sun is shining. I know how you feel - I want my husband back, more than anything in this world I want to see him. There is a part of me that knows I can't see him but there is a big part of me that won't accept this. I'm lost, not lonely, don't know why but I'm not. Just want to be on my own away from everyone which we all know is not great.

I don't know how to do life on my own.