Does anybody else get consumed with negative thoughts about themselves and general anxiety when starting a new relationship?
I ve been alone for years as i have isolated myself without realising until its too late.I have few friends outside of work, i do have a fantastic sister though who has her own struggles so i dont want to talk to her about my problems incase it sparks off her depression again. I just wonderd if anyone could help me out.
I m desperatly lonely, though i wont admit that to anyone, my greatest wish is to meet someone and not be alone anymore. I ve recently met a man and this has sparked off a bad anxiety episode. He gave me his number, he s taken me out, he texts me regularly and yet im consumed with the thoughts that he s doing it as a joke and he does nt really like me. H e knows i get anxious, he noticed it despite my oscar worthy performance of being outgoing and confident.
I try really hard not to be needy and to act like a normal person was. H e had to cancel a date the other day and it instantly made my anxiety dissapear, it must be a see i told you so but to myself...why do i do that!
I just want to be able to relax and enjoy new things happening to me, im frightend, all the time im frightend of life and of being cast aside again. I seem to be disposable, i attract men who are looking for a port in a storm, i fix them up and they leave me. Can anyone help with some advice so i can break this habit, i dont want to be alone for the rest of my life and im all too aware that its something im doing that drives them away xx
Written by
looking-glass34
To view profiles and participate in discussions please or .
I do feel this is not just a fear with have when suffering from anxiety , but one most people have when starting a new relationship
Some of how you feel could be the fact that most of us , have very little self worth & therefore we struggle to understand why someone else would want or like us
Relationships dont come with guarantees , would be handy if they did , so its always a chance we take , will it or wont it work
Maybe , when you first meet someone , try not to read to much into it , take each date as it comes & enjoy it for what it is , if thats dinner or going for a drink , enjoy the company & if it develops into more later down the line , well thats good , if not you will have had a few nice nights out
Just because we suffer with anxiety , we are worth been loved as there are so many positives about us as well & try & start to believe thats what others see
Its hard but if we can love ourselves & look in the mirror & say I am worth been loved & to be treated well , then we will attract the right kind of people , yes it takes some practice, but keep doing it , even when you dont feel or believe it & eventually you will
Love
whywhy
xxx
Hi there
I cant really offer any words of wisdom on this cos I feel exactly the same, but I think whywhy has very eloquently stepped in with fab words of wisdom. Just wanted to say youre not alone and I feel exactly the same....
Content on HealthUnlocked does not replace the relationship between you and doctors or other healthcare professionals nor the advice you receive from them.
Never delay seeking advice or dialling emergency services because of something that you have read on HealthUnlocked.