Hi all I have serious anxiety and my depression is slightly more controllable since I've been up medication I have been seeking help for atleast 1 year I have Ben on about 4 different medication I have had cbt therapy and a relaxation group. I have now been referred to the community mental health team I have been on there waiting list for about 4 months and finally I have a assessment in a couple of weeks. After all this waiting in the letter I received it said the assessment is to find out if we can do anything to help and it doesn't mean I am getting the support, I have worked so hard seeing loads of people and I have loads of information to show what I am experiencing and I don't think I will ever be happy in this life I have wanted to be put to sleep for a good few years now life is too difficult and I feel it is best if I put to piece, when I go for this assessment if they say they don't think they can help I feel like I will go into a breakdown state as the comunity mental health team is the last resort if they can't help no one can!! My head is really messed up I don't even know what life is and why I am even here. I believe smoking canonised when I was young and drinking a lot of vodka in my past made me a lot worst. My life now- I go to the gym walk my dog and the rest of the time I feel uneasy on edge scared fearfull and dizzy. I need a friend but I can't trust anyone. P.s I haven't took drugs for about 5 years and haven't drunk alkohl for about 2 years, hoping to finally face my illness but I am still in a bad way! Some advice may help thanks.