On Monday, October 14, my brother-in-law passed away from cancer. It was irreversible. He had such masses of cancer around his liver in his stomach and doctors couldn’t do anything to help him. He was an amazing father and tolerated my sister. She was very mentally, emotionally, and psychologically abusive to him. She would lock him out of his own home if he was even 10 minutes late, coming back from work and she would call me and tell me these things when he was at work and thought it was funny. I would never laugh and it would make her mad because I wasn’t condoning her abusive behavior toward him. She’s even gotten mad at me for telling her what she’s doing is abusive toward him. my brother-in-law and I used to talk often on the phone when she wasn’t around and he would tell me a lot of emotions he was going through with her. And reminded me of the time I told my brother-in-law he should run and not get involved with her. Thinking I was joking, I was being very serious. I know what type of person she is and him getting involved with her was a bad idea. But you have to let people figure those things out for themselves. my sister pretty much pushed herself on him. The type of person my brother-in-law was, he was just too nice a person and I’m pretty sure he made it very clear to her. He wasn’t wanting to get involved with her too quickly. within four months, she got into a fight with our dad and she use that as an excuse to runoff to my brother-in-law‘s house and move herself in. throughout the years, they would have a lot of turmoil not when they were living in the same town I was in. It started after my brother-in-law was laid off from work and he had to move back to get a job and where his siblings and parents was. My sister was told, only told he was going to move back to his hometown, he did not ask her if she wanted to come with him. She just packed her stuff and went with him, and I think he was in fear of telling her , he didn’t want her to go because of the retaliation she would take on him. And I was the only one that saw through that whole ordeal. for a year or two after they moved out there, my brother in law never told anyone not his family not his parents what he was going through with her. But when I went out to visit, when I turned 18 just after I graduated, I can always sense a lot of animosity with him, and when she would say things or sarcastically say things or, put things in innuendos at my brother-in-law I could tell he would be uncomfortable or be upset. He wouldn’t say anything to her to defend himself and I know he didn’t do it. We both knew she would just fly off the handle and just lose her lid over comments or responding to her. She called me months after I came back from visiting with my sister and my brother-in-law, they still hadn’t been married yet by the way, and she was laughing when I picked up the phone. I asked her why she was laughing. She said her boyfriend was at work and the night before he had told her , he is the type of person that would never get married to anybody unless they got pregnant. He would be a responsible father. And I heard her dumping her pills into the sink and I asked her what she was doing and she said he told me, he would never marry anyone unless the girl got pregnant. And she says, oops. I just dropped my pills down the sink. That has resonated in my head for all my life because she forced him to marry her. Before I know it, she’s telling the family she’s pregnant and she’s married or getting married . I knew she had forced him into it and I never told him she purposely got herself pregnant. If I ever said anything, she told me, and I did a couple different times at the right moments or when the moment came that she told me something that was opposite of what she was telling someone else, she would call me a liar, and she worked hard at getting people to understand that I was just a compulsive, liar and never for anyone to ever believe me in our family. So when she was telling people she got pregnant and she couldn’t understand why, she was on antibiotics and she was on birth control. I began to tell them that’s not what she told me and she turned around and told everybody I was lying so I just never said anything ever again that she told me and I started avoiding her phone calls. I didn’t like how she would do things to my brother-in-law. There’s another time I went out to visit and I told him, it just came right out and told him I know that you’re having problems with my sister and he didn’t say anything. He just looked at me like he wanted to cry , I told him I know that you were just trapped. I know that your dealing with a lot with her and I know he wanted to say things, but he didn’t know how much he could trust me so I had to get him to slowly trust me, and I’ve kept everything he said to me to myself all these years and now he’s gone. I always knew all the torment and abuse that he endured with my sister. Every time I went out to visit, she would do all these things like she was so darn broken and expected him to wait on her hand and foot and when he was at work, she did everything possible and even lifted things she said she could not do when he was around. she locked him out of his own house in the dead of winter, it could get 10 or 15 below, making him sleep in his truck. of course she would not go to his family, he didn’t want them to know what she was doing to him. I always looked at him and rolled my eyes and just let him know I understand. But I also knew his pain and agony, his anguish, but I can tell you that my brother-in-law never cheated on her not one time because he knows what responsibility to be a father and a husband meant. One day, I called to talk to my sister, ask her a question for our mother and my brother-in-law answered the phone we started chatting. I asked him how he was doing. He got quiet and I already knew what was wrong. I told him you don’t need to tell me I already know you’re having trouble with my sister again for the millionth time. and that’s when we started having our Sunday conversations. At one point he told me, my brother-in-law said the only reason why he sticks around is because of his sons and he didn’t want to make them unhappy. I kept that secret with me all my life I know my sister would’ve probably done something really bad to him, and she never appreciated anything he ever did for her, she complained about her house and the house he bought for them to live in was a very, very, very nice house. It was amazing. By the way before anybody thinks anything, I was very married to my husband and with three children.. my brother-in-law and my husband were very good friends to each other. And he would tell me a lot of other things where I knew he was very unhappy and worked every shift he was given, even taking overtime. Every chance he had he would send my sister back home to her hometown. To visit our parents and it wasn’t only for a one week vacation it was for the entire summer so he can catch a break and go spend time with his family, his brothers and sisters and his parents. My sister would never or hardly ever allowed him time with his siblings and my sister would come out to visit and she would just badmouth his family , so much it would make me sick to my stomach. every day she was visiting with our family. She called him every single day until he picked up the phone or would call every place. She knew he would be at of course at the time we did not have cell phones, and she would call the bar he would go with friends , and everyone always knew who she was. They hurt her voice, this is how bad my brother-in-law‘s life was. I met my brother-in-law‘s family and they are amazing people they made me feel like I was a sister to them and they took me all over the state They lived in and educated about all the different ways of life and the way people are toward each other. Just a lot of things. I didn’t even wanna leave and come back home.
when I found out my brother-in-law was dying of cancer. I have not been the same. I will miss my brother-in-law, and he did not deserve this kind of ending. My brain cannot stop thinking , my brother-in-law knew he was sick and when he was diagnosed with my sister being there around him, he was told he had six weeks or six months to live. I can’t remember he declined so fast and the doctor said that his troubles probably started two years prior. I can’t help to think my brother-in-law already knew he was sick and he wasn’t gonna do anything about it made sure his two sons were well off, and they were gonna be able to survive without him, and this was my brother-in-law‘s only out of his marriage to my sister because my sister was evil toward him.
I didn’t know who else to tell and I know that this group has to remain quiet about the things that are said and I needed to get this down on some thing somewhere , my only concern now is my brother-in-law‘s two boys are going to have to deal with the burden of my sister and they’re gonna have to take care of her and she’s gonna make herself a complete abscess to their lives. I know she is going to cause a lot of issues between my nephews and their wives because that’s how my sister is. She ran off my eldest nephews first girlfriend by taking control of everything my nephew‘s girlfriend did and she finally just left. I felt so bad for her and my nephew, because my sister tormented that girl and my sister would tell me and I knew better than to believe that a girl who I didn’t know very well was subjecting herself to being cruel to my sister, because that’s what my sister always said about everybody she didn’t like that was a female. I just recently found out two days after my brother-in-law died. The same night that he died she started talking about moving back to the hometown and getting rid of the house I’ve never known anybody who is so quick to start trying to turn over a new leave after being with somebody for so many years and just moving on just like that just up and selling the house like it was Nothing , and moving back to her hometown like nothing ever happened. And that really angers me with the depression that I have, it has even gotten worse because I feel so bad for my nephews and I’m sad as sad could be that my brother-in-law is gone and he didn’t deserve this.
xx
Why do I even try?
I Feel Trapped and Miserable 
Severely Depressed and Angry!!!
I yelled at some family members
