Hello Everyone

Hello. I hope you're doing well if you're reading this. If you aren't doing well right now, I'm not either so don't feel too bad

I've been hesitant to make a post because I don't know what to say, and I'm not the most articulate person in the world. But I'll try...

I'm 28 years old and I struggle with social anxiety. My struggles with it have severely inhibited my ability live and function in society. Most of my late teens and twenties have been spent living at home, with parents, working online for low pay, in social isolation. Because I've isolated myself, I lack a ton of the critical life experience that most my age would have by now (job, education, friendship, relationship related stuff). Definitely it's a source of shame and embarrassment, which only exasperates the fear I have of social interaction. I just feel as if I'm too strange to connect with or relate with anyone; I worry that if I "put myself out there" I'll be rejected or ridiculed. I'm worried that I'll never have the skills or social tools to go out into the world and take care of myself, my own affairs. And I should make it clear that I take full responsibility for these problems. Sure, people around me could've done more to help, but the choices and decisions I didn't make put me in this predicament (I've always lacked courage). So, now I'm an old man just trying to pick up the pieces and move forward the best I can.

This all reads as depressing (& it is), but it hasn't been all bad. I'm a fairly easygoing person despite it all.And in addition online work, I've started working for my family's startup restaurant last year, but it's been tough financially. It's at least has given me an opportunity to interact with others.

Ugh there's so much more I could say, but I don't want to say too much and bore people. If you read this, thank you for sharing some of you're time. And I hope you grow to manage and live with whatever you're struggling with. I mean that.

[litethatnevergoesout]

thank you for sharing and welcome to a great community of kind and supportive people. I don’t know how serious you were about calling yourself an old man, 28 is not even close to being old. you’ve got a lifetime in front of you still.

[Hidden in reply to litethatnevergoesout]

thank you for you're kindness. and yea you're right, there's still so much life to live. and i was only half joking about my age lol

[Starrlight]

I like your name. So glad you are here and I think you expressed yourself so well. And can tell you are a genuinely caring person. I also have social anxiety and am on Paxil for it. I feel like I’m a weirdo and from childhood trauma tend to feel not good enough. I’m also reading a good self help book called Manifest so I can hopefully heal.

[Hidden in reply to Starrlight]

thank you starrlight and i like your name as well. childhood trauma has left me feeling the same way. it's astonishing just how much the negative experiences you had as a child, and how they made you felt, manifest into adulthood. and i just saved 'Manifest' to my reading list. it looks to offer practical steps (which i appreciate), AND ITS ORANGE!

[Starrlight in reply to Hidden]

😆

[gajh]

Welcome. I am very glad that you posted and that you are reaching out. Here you can talk to people who understand and you don't have to worry about the shame and embarrassment. You are not alone. It is great that you have started working at the restaurant and are getting the chance to interact with others.

[Hidden in reply to gajh]

thanks gajh. you all have made me feel welcome. and yes i must remember than i'm not the only person in the world going through this. there are so many of us dealing with these issues.

[Kevo1]

Hi, can I say to you, please don't say it's a source of shame, it most certainly isn't, and also don't blame yourself. Everyone on here can relate to your situation to a degree. It's hard battling it. You have had hard time, but you have whole life ahead of you. Your making an effort by sound things despite the difficulties. Well done. Good luck in your fight against it. Lot of good listeners here

[Hidden in reply to Kevo1]

thank you so much for these encouraging words. they give me hope that i can escape this mentality of self depreciation that im sitting in. i really need to be kinder to myself. i will keep fighting.

[Ellamaye]

Thankyou for sharing and we all see so many posts about people not feeling like they fit in and have trouble socialising. It must be a normal thing or there wouldn't be so many who feel the same way.

[marsbarr in reply to Ellamaye]

Yes

[Hidden in reply to Ellamaye]

thank you for taking the time to read my post and comment. and yes, you're sure right about it, when i actually. so many people struggle with anxiety! even reading through the form, you realize you're not alone. its comforting

[Dolphin14]

I hope this new job working in the family business opens doors for you.

You are far from an old man. You have plenty of time to turn this around and live a full life. You deserve that

🐬

[Hidden in reply to Dolphin14]

i appreciate you saying that Dolphin14. although working at the restaurant has presented financial challenges, it has given me the opportunity to get out of the house and work on my social skills. and there has been some improvement!

oh but i must refute one claim you made. i am an old man. i eat...oatmeal

[Dolphin14 in reply to Hidden]

Great news Glad you have noticed improvements.

What kind of oatmeal? I like brown sugar cinnamon

[Hidden in reply to Dolphin14]

The same thing: brown sugar, cinnamon, 2 scoops of peanut butter, some fruit, and a drizzle of almond milk. It's delicious.

[Dolphin14 in reply to Hidden]

I do peanut butter too! Crunchy

Im getting mine now. 🥣

[marsbarr]

Welcome. You have come to a place where everyone understands. We are friends you never met. We are blankets of comfort, we care.

[Hidden in reply to marsbarr]

hello marsbarr! thank you for welcoming me. i didn't know what to expect introducing myself, but you all have been extremely kind -- to a complete stranger no-less. i wish you well.