For some reason, a combination of those is my main issue. I absolutely despise myself and I also despise needing help from anyone, despite me being happy to help anyone who needs it. I don't view them any less for needing help, but me? Me needing help is a sign of my own incompetence. Which only fuels the self loathing even further.
It really is fascinating how the mind can be so messed up beyond reason, but also unfortunate as there's only one way to stop it.