hardest day in a while.: today was one... - Anxiety and Depre...

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hardest day in a while.

Daisy425 profile image
35 Replies

today was one of the most challenging days I’ve had in a while. I woke up anxious because of the weekends events. I was hoping I could shake the anxiety but that wasn’t the case. My stomach hurt all day today and I couldn’t tell if it was anxiety or if I’m sick. Regardless, it made me more anxious because I am so afraid of being sick and of throwing up. I cried multiple times at work. I was proud of myself for staying. Now I’m eating soup and bread from Panera which feels fine. The pain was in my upper stomach. My friends at work said it’s probably gas but who knows. I’m just so anxious. I don’t want to be sick. I also don’t want to keep feeling anxious. I’m mad at myself for feeling this way because it’s the first time I have in a while since I finished my IOP group. It makes me think maybe I didn’t work hard enough. I’m scared to keep eating because I don’t want to get sick. I’m scared to go to bed because I don’t want to wake up in the middle of the night sick, or wake up in the morning anxious. My temp was also 99.3 but my dad said that’s not a fever. I think my anxiety raised it because a few minutes later it was back to 98.8. But it’s stressing me out

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Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425
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35 Replies

Daisy, Do some deep breathing you’re beating yourself up, I’m not a dr but I think your stomach issues have nothing to do with being sick. you need to eat and sleep, so connecting the stomach issue with either one is thinking to much about it and the fear you have has taken hold. I don’t have any resources on guided meditations or breathing techniques but do believe these would help you. you’re living with anxiety which is something I can relate to along with the majority of the community is able to relate to. the brain and gut have a peculiar link and one of the things that anxiety is good at is making whatever fear you have worse. deep breaths you’re stronger than the anxiety.

I’m proud you stuck it out at work to that’s awesome and crying is good too.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to litethatnevergoesout

You think the pain is anxiety? I’m used to feeling nauseous when I’m anxious, not having pain. I was able to eat some soup and bread. I still feel a little hungry but I want to wait a bit before eating more. I don’t want to overdo it.

litethatnevergoesout profile image
litethatnevergoesout in reply to Daisy425

I do not know what the pain could be from. I am sorry you’re stomach is giving you trouble. Do you have a general practitioner you can set up having a physical with?

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to litethatnevergoesout

I do. This just started today. This morning actually. I woke up anxious and then I got stomach pain.

I totally understand your stress. Seems like your anxiety and stomach are in a loop I’m really sorry about your pain. Quieting the anxiety may give your stomach relief.

Is the pain sharp or dull, is it constant or does it throb?

I pass a lot of kidney stones, many years ago my first kidney stone was diagnosed as a bladder infection. Which made the actual kidney stone experience more scary. Drs can be wrong too.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to litethatnevergoesout

The pain is in my upper stomach and it’s full. Idk if it’s because I’m not eating enough or if it’s anxiety or if I’m sick

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to litethatnevergoesout

I agree 100%. Also, the pain could be from anxiety. It reeks havoc on our bodies. I get all kinds of physical problems due to anxiety.

Deep breathing is so powerful. It's been scientifically proven to get us out of panic and anxiety. Meditation too.

Daisy425 Here's a link to a deep breathing video that I have found invaluable. It also shows how to activate the vagus nerve at the same time.

youtu.be/ZYeejlzh8t4?si=4Zo...

I use 'my monk' (I call him) to meditate. He does guided meditation. Here's his link. youtube.com/@BuddhistSociet...

I hope it helps. Sorry I hijacked your reply! I couldn't help but to agree with you litethatnevergoesout .

Hugs

litethatnevergoesout profile image
litethatnevergoesout in reply to Swilly97

Totally ok Swilly97 !

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Swilly97

Thank you so much!! I just wish it would all stop. I know there’s no reason for my anxiety and I wish I could be strong enough to push it away

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to Daisy425

No don't beat yourself up. Anxiety is irrational and its not you, it's just in your life right now. You are stronger than you think. You're here right? This forum for help.

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to Daisy425

Hi Daisy. You don't need to be strong to push it away. The key to recovery lies in accepting all the symptoms you are experiencing and not pushing it away, avoiding them, deliberately distracting yourself or suprressing the symptoms..

Judging by your comment about having anxiety for no reason says to me that the reason you are still suffering is because you are continually trying not to feel anxious.

Do the opposite and do nothing to change those scary thoughts or feelings and work on being ok about not feeling ok. Its just anxiety venting out and needs to be left to do its thing. This is how recovery works but sufferers don't realise that and interfere with the natural physiological healing process by refusing to feel it all willingly and unwittingly delaying recovery that is patiently waiting in the wings to do its thing when you learn to accept it all.

Best wishes

Beevee ❤️

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Beevee

Thank you so much I appreciate it! I love hearing everyone’s advice. It helps so much

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Beevee

I was waiting for this comment :) I could feel the anxiety in Daisy’s post, the key really is to just accept. It’s like the magic you’ve been looking for forever. I’ve found 99% of the time what I feel is anxiety and not whatever catastrophe I’ve made up. Acceptance works either way. If you’re sick… ok. If it’s anxiety… ok. I don’t know why worry gives us some weird sense of control, it’s such a sick trick.

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to MindfulMoment

Never been one to disappoint 😊

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97

I relate to you and your post so much that I could've written most of it myself.

I do still have the fear/phobia but it's lessened only because of exposure therapy. When I was told that was my only way out, I was scared to pieces. I thought no freakin way.

That being said, you seem to maybe, be stuck in the freeze or flight response of anxiety. (just my opinion I have no credentials) Not fun. It's somewhere I go sometimes too.

I feel that you need therapy or help in some form. Ya know? Like, even Youtube. I know I suggest it to many people but, when I was desperate, I went to to do self help on it. I still do. Every night I watch 1 or 2 self help videos. It helps I promise.

It was the only thing I could do at times because I can control what I hear. I could stop it or pause, rewind, or fast forward because, some therapists wouldn't just stop if I was uncomfortable or anxious you know? It doesn't have to be exposure therapy it could just be something to get you out of this response your in.

Crisis, flight or freeze response is terrible and I'm so sorry that you're struggling.

Do you have any meds to help? Sometimes the placebo effect helps. Zofran or promethazine? Or klonopin? Benadryl and antihistamines can help nausea and anxiety too if you don't have meds.

You need a hugggggggggggggg

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Swilly97

Thank you so so much. I just completed an IOP group, but I can’t sustain it with work. I would take leave off work but work actually helps my anxiety so much, just not today I guess. I do have a therapist as well. Those videos are a great suggestion so thank you! I currently take Zoloft for my anxiety. I have Zantac I could take for my stomach. I guess I’m in this position where I wish I knew if my stomach pain was anxiety or sickness. I know the anxiety I could try to control where as a sickness I can’t. But in reality it doesn’t matter the cause.

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to Daisy425

Good that you have some resources! Leaving work sounds like it won't help. I'm glad you know that ya know? It's insightful.

Your pain, if I could opine, is probably from anxiety and stress. Been there too. I'm not an expert or doc but, I just have been there so much. Stress can do a number on our bodies.

You'll be ok. Right now, you're safe.

Maybe, try, (from experience) stomp your feet, clap your hands, put some ice on your head or hold it tightly, whatever will help get you out of anxious mode.

I feel terrible for you but I think that you'll be ok. I still am. There's hope.

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to Daisy425

And, you're here right! Vent if you want. We're here to help each other.

litethatnevergoesout profile image
litethatnevergoesout in reply to Swilly97

Nice I like what swilly is saying.

I take clonopin to jar myself free of being caught in a major panic attack. A Benadryl seems to quiet anxiety as well.

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to litethatnevergoesout

Yes for sure. Clonopin has saved me a few times. Benadryl helps with the nausea too.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Swilly97

I’m just stressed about if I can go to work or not tomorrow. I’m a teacher. My temp most of the day was 98.8 but earlier when I was anxious and crying it was 99.3.

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to Daisy425

Oy. But, that's mild right? Take it again after about 2 hours from your last maybe? I get hot and sweaty from stress and anxiety it could be that.

You sound like me. I just checked my temp last night and thought I was sick. I had covid a few months ago btw and I didn't get sick, if that helps you at all.

Work-That's a tough decision bc you'll be anxious. Will there be triggers at school? It could be good to go, get you over this hump.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Swilly97

Work always helps. Today was hard but it was nice being around people and not all alone at home. I’m glad you weren’t too sick with covid!!

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to Daisy425

It was very mild. Same with my family too but, I know it can be tough with some.

Work sounds kinda therapeutic. That's a good thing. I know when I just sit on the couch and avoid, I'm miserable. Be strong 💪. You can do this. You're just being deeply involved with anxiety right now. It's not who you are though. Gotta get out of this fun anxiety cycle. If anything, time does help in my experience. Tomorrow's a new day.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to Swilly97

Thank you so much! I’m feeling better, which seems to happen in the evenings. Then in the morning the cycle begins again

Swilly97 profile image
Swilly97 in reply to Daisy425

Same. I peak when the sun goes down. Try to think of tomorrow as a new chance. Instead of it being the same anxious cycle. I know it's easier said than done.

Beevee profile image
Beevee in reply to Daisy425

Very, very common cycle! Use those moments of clarity in the evening to ask yourself where all those scary thoughts and feelings have gone? If just proves that all the symptoms that are there the next day are nonsense, a symptom of anxiety, not based on reality and not to be respected or given any attention. These glimpses of normality make it easier to accept the symptoms when they are present and to let them go.

MindfulMoment profile image
MindfulMoment in reply to Daisy425

That’s a great indicator you’re experiencing anxiety. Fevers always go up at the witching hour (evening) and you always feel worse when sick. Anxiety in the morning and feeling better at night is classic anxiety. Hope tomorrow is a better day for you :)

loveletters profile image
loveletters

Hi Daisy, are you anxious about other things besides being sick? I am anxious about driving and have social anxiety. Maybe if you put on some relaxing music or do some meditation it will help with your anxiety. I hope you feel better soon.

Daisy425 profile image
Daisy425 in reply to loveletters

I get a lot of anxiety around getting sick. It’s my biggest trigger as of right now.

SayNOtoPanic profile image
SayNOtoPanic

Hope you feel better soon Daisy. The upper GI pain totally sounds stress induced. Maybe take a bubble bath and do some deep breathing combo. Just take it easy on yourself. Try mindfulness too just identifying things around you with no judgement. As soon as you start thinking of fearful stuff. I get how you feel you’re not alone. Hugs.

Pitalife profile image
Pitalife

Try some soothing music on YouTube there tons great music to relax too,I take some me time n listen to nature sounds on YouTube or relaxing music,or try to go for lil walk..just may help calm you,I suffer severely w anxiety n depression so we gotta help ourselves if we can..stay w this group very neat people here who understand your struggles....much luck 2 u.. .pita...

punkster profile image
punkster

Bless your heart. I understand because I've been there. I also had a hard day yesterday, but I lived through it. During the worst of Covid I was constantly taking my temperature, and I discovered that it fluctuates throughout the day. In the late afternoon it is highest- sometimes 99 degrees or slightly higher. If I rested and relaxed it went back down. I also had stomach issues, like you. I had to take Prilosec for a while. I wondered if I had cancer. Fortunately, those days are over for now. Therapy helped because I talk to myself differently now. Meditation and breathing helped. Exercise helped. I learned to play the piano (again) and that reduces my anxiety. My advice to you would be to stop taking your temperature. You will know when you have a fever because your body will feel terrible. Also, you might try looking into Dr. Claire Weeks. Learning how to accept my anxiety and let time pass really helped me to "get out of my head".

Pel3749 profile image
Pel3749

Hi Daisy, the lining of your stomach and brain are very similar. Usually anxiety will effect your stomach. Try to eat and stay hydrated. Going for a walk especially with someone will definitely help. I have been there many times . Hope that you have a counselor or therapist that you can talk to. This is very common but there are people that you can confide in. Hope you feel better soon. God bless

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