I've been in denial a long timeBecause where I'm from emotions are for the weak and feebleminded.
Wrongs were done to me and no one gives a damn. I was raped, not protected and make to feel ashamed and responsible by my mom.
She's not married to my father.
He has his family and they're doing quite good for themselves.
He however isolates me or ignores me because he fears my mom has a hold on me.
They are both mad at each other and I suffer. He doesn't know what I've been through because I feel this need to prove to him I'm strong despite his abandonment. I also feel obligated to keep my mom's role a secret because she's my mom and I feel like she needs my help always.
She has a way of gaslighting me .
I'm used to having toxic partners and now there's a new pure hearted healthy man in my life and I can't even relate to that.
They broke me with their constant rejection and I can't even help myself move on.