Guilt

[Lookingforhope20100]

Guilt, it's a horrible feeling. It makes people crazy. It causes people to act out. I feel guilty very guilty. So something happened and now I feel like crap. but I'll get to what happened here in a second. First, I want to talk about my anxiety, I've had more anxiety/panic attacks in the last few days than I've had in the last few years I thought I was doing good now not so much. Now onto why I feel guilty... I found my angel, my prince whatever you choose to call him but I did a horrible thing to him today and I hope you all don't judge me or hate me. ok, here goes everything. I was at work when I got a text saying my friend (for story's sake let's call him Smith) Smith saying he needed to talk and that he just got into a huge with his roommate now I'm not the type that leaves people in need in the dust so I go over intending to just talk and we did talk for a while then things took a turn when he was comforting me after a panic attack struck we ended up having sex I cheated on the person I love more than anything and now the guilt is eating me alive but I have to keep it a secret because I can't lose my angel I wanted to stop but I was scared that if I said stop he would do something anyways or hurt me or get mad at me and now it's all I can think about to the point where life sucks and my anxiety is higher than ever. I don't know what to do, I just needed to tell someone what happened.

[God-sFavourite]

This is the worst thing that can happen to someone 😣 Unfortunately, I too have been a part of that guilt some years ago. The reason that we ended up having sex was different though.

You know, I used to blame myself a lot for it but then I slowly started to realise and analyze the situation carefully. In my case, the intend was not to cheat on my current partner rather it was the pain that had been stuck inside of me. The pain of my previous breakup. I gave my 200% in that relationship yet got cheated multiple times in the whole 6 years of it until I finally chose to walk out.

So my current partner just came as a friend in my life and I never got to know how fast we bonded and he started healing me without even knowing an inch of my past.

So somewhere that past's pain was stuck which came out like this.

I never told him anything until now because I felt that it is important to first forgive myself. If I don't, I don't have any right to expect the same from him.

It's been a few years now and finally I have forgiven myself and someday, if the situation is right and favourable, I will let him know all of this and I'm sure the kind of person he is, he will understand me.

No one is God. Everyone makes mistakes. Just let him discuss his mistakes and listen to them with the intent of forgiving him in the end. That way, you both will end up bonding more strong.

Also, analyse yourself about why you ended up doing that and the moment you forgive yourself, things will start falling in place.

Good luck 🤞

[Mrspjsmom]

Try your best to let go of the guilt and move forward. It happened but is now in the past. We already beat ourselves up so much. No need to add to that.

[Agamemnon2022]

I too have done several things that I regret and have tremendous guilt over. I often wonder what good does it do that God forgives me, if I can't forgive myself. Forgiving yourself is hard. I don't know if I'll ever forgive myself.

All we have is now. This moment and time. We can never go backwards and undo what we have done. We can only move forward while carrying the load. Hopefully, one day the load will ease. But for me I think it will always be there to some degree.

Good luck in your journey.

[Brooklyn99]

Hi. I am so sorry that you are going through this. I know it is very difficult right now but we need to start taking responsibility for our actions. People make mistakes all the time. One day he will find out. Trust me. It will be worse if he finds out about it through somebody else. You feel guilty because you are human and you need to listen to that guilt because it is asking you to do the right thing and tell him. It will damage him, and your relationship, yes. But he deserves to know the truth. This guilt will keep eating you if you hide it for too long. Try and imagine yourself in his shoes...how would you have felt. Maybe, he will forgive or maybe he won't But as a human being he deserves to have that choice. When we truly love someone we do what's best for them even if we don't end up getting anything out of it. Even if you choose to stay, anything that you do for him won't come out of a place of love but sheer guilt. He is a human being and if even for a moment he made you happy then he deserves to know the truth. Of course, it is your choice. I am just trying to help you understand the possibilities of what will happen if you choose to not tell him the truth. All the best.